[Copypasta] A Reddit comment summarized and compressed

Anne frankly, I did nazi that coming. I literally came here to say this but boy, that escalated quickly so to the top with you! Lost it at 'This is why we can't have nice things' and then my faith in humanity was restored, my mind blown, and manly tears were shed. Well said. As a 'murican, I can confirm this gem has just won the internet and is doing it right. Just sayin', I know that feel, bro, and while that was a risky click, this post was a 9/10, 11/10 with rice, would read again. I see what you did there and it feels good man. You're doing God's work, son. I laughed way harder than I should have at your list that seems legit and totally nailed it. You - I like you. You magnificent bastard; you, sir, are so brave, a gentleman and a scholar, and seeing how you are a redditor for 4 years, this checks out, so I'll allow it. I regret that I only have one upvote to give for this cool story, bro. CTRL+F "about tree fiddy" was not disappointed. Wait, why do I have you tagged as "NOPE NOPE NOPE"? Nice try, you monster. You are now banned from /r/pyongyang What did I just read? Dafuq? I read that as "YOU HAD ONE JOB". I can't fap to this. No true scotsman could see that this relevant XKCD was bad, and you should feel bad. You must be new to reddit, so I'll see your cakeday and raise you a karma train. One does not simply rustle my jimmies, not even once. Jet fuel can't melt dank memes, that stahp gave me cancer for science, so that's enough internet for me today. OP is a fuzzy little man-peach, 2/10, would not bang. What is this I don't even know how is this wtf? Fuck Jenny. Circlejerk must be leaking. This will get buried but brace yourselves, some men want to watch the world burn right in the feels. When you see it, they'll KILL IT WITH FIRE! But this has nothing to do with atheism. Lawyer up, delete facebook, hit the gym, and SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY, said no one ever, so you wouldn't download a strawman. /r/dadjokes. Damn onions, you scary like a BOSS. whoosh. Since rule #1 is 'be attractive', I'll just leave this here: This is my [f]irst post, be gentle. Edit: This blew up. RIP my inbox. Edit: thanks for the gold kind stranger
August 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
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Undertale Annoying Dog

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘ โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
March 2016

Little dribble drop

You guys ever like hustle your pee too quickly and pull your dick in faster than youโ€™re done shaking? Then you have that little dribble drop that goes onto your leg. Itโ€™s only a drop. But you fucking feel it. Sprawling down your thigh. Making its presence known and ruining whatever plans you just had. Just happened. The fucking worst.
April 2021

WallStreetBets

That's some bad shit right there

twitchquotes: do NOT sign me the FUCK up ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘€ bad shit baฬทฬถ ิ sHit ๐Ÿ‘Ž thats โŒ some bad ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘Žshit right ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘Ž th ๐Ÿ‘Ž ere ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘Ž right โŒ there โŒ โŒ if i do ฦฝaาฏ so my sel๏ฝ†๐Ÿšซ i say so ๐Ÿšซ thats not what im talking about right there right there (chorus: สณแถฆแตสฐแต— แต—สฐแต‰สณแต‰) mMMMMแŽทะœ ๐Ÿšซ ๐Ÿ‘Ž ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘ŽะO0ะžเฌ ๏ผฏOO๏ผฏOะžเฌ เฌ Ooooแต’แต’แต’แต’แต’แต’แต’แต’แต’ ๐Ÿ‘Ž ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘Ž ๐Ÿ‘Ž ๐Ÿšซ ๐Ÿ‘Ž ๐Ÿ‘€ ๐Ÿ‘€ ๐Ÿ‘€ ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘ŽBad shit
twitch chat
April 2016

My 86-year-old grandmother replied "OK, boomer" to my boomer aunt in an argument

Backstory: I live round the corner from my gran and visit her often so thanks to me she has a vague grasp of what memes are and how they work. The other day when I was round at hers and she asked what memes were popular at the moment so I told her about the "OK boomer" meme. She knew what boomers were already so she was able to get the concept of this meme fairly easily. Fast forward to today, I'm over at my gran's again, and she's on the phone to my aunt. They got into a disagreement over a slightly racist comment my aunt made the other day (my gran is very much against racism) and my gran eventually just said "OK boomer" and hung up. I've never been so proud. UPDATE: So I told my gran about this post and the reaction it got - she said she's glad that so many of you enjoyed her little joke and that it proves she's still young at heart. I agree with that 100%.
December 2021

This chat is awful

twitchquotes: This chat is awful, literally ass, except ass can bring pleasure, and this chat is the goddamn antithesis of pleasure. This chat takes life from children and kittens and puts that pure innocence into phallic pus. This chat is disappointment and hate of humanity funneled into barely literate text that takes intelligence and shits all over it before making a shit sculpture out of the souls of everyone watching this whore of a stream. Everyone in this chat is the dregs of humanity, if even that, content with postulating whatever ass talk they can squeeze out of the withered rectum of their wasted lives.
twitch chat
August 2018

I hate Twitch Chat

Text-to-Speech Playing