[Copypasta] A Reddit comment summarized and compressed

Anne frankly, I did nazi that coming. I literally came here to say this but boy, that escalated quickly so to the top with you! Lost it at 'This is why we can't have nice things' and then my faith in humanity was restored, my mind blown, and manly tears were shed. Well said. As a 'murican, I can confirm this gem has just won the internet and is doing it right. Just sayin', I know that feel, bro, and while that was a risky click, this post was a 9/10, 11/10 with rice, would read again. I see what you did there and it feels good man. You're doing God's work, son. I laughed way harder than I should have at your list that seems legit and totally nailed it. You - I like you. You magnificent bastard; you, sir, are so brave, a gentleman and a scholar, and seeing how you are a redditor for 4 years, this checks out, so I'll allow it. I regret that I only have one upvote to give for this cool story, bro. CTRL+F "about tree fiddy" was not disappointed. Wait, why do I have you tagged as "NOPE NOPE NOPE"? Nice try, you monster. You are now banned from /r/pyongyang What did I just read? Dafuq? I read that as "YOU HAD ONE JOB". I can't fap to this. No true scotsman could see that this relevant XKCD was bad, and you should feel bad. You must be new to reddit, so I'll see your cakeday and raise you a karma train. One does not simply rustle my jimmies, not even once. Jet fuel can't melt dank memes, that stahp gave me cancer for science, so that's enough internet for me today. OP is a fuzzy little man-peach, 2/10, would not bang. What is this I don't even know how is this wtf? Fuck Jenny. Circlejerk must be leaking. This will get buried but brace yourselves, some men want to watch the world burn right in the feels. When you see it, they'll KILL IT WITH FIRE! But this has nothing to do with atheism. Lawyer up, delete facebook, hit the gym, and SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY, said no one ever, so you wouldn't download a strawman. /r/dadjokes. Damn onions, you scary like a BOSS. whoosh. Since rule #1 is 'be attractive', I'll just leave this here: This is my [f]irst post, be gentle. Edit: This blew up. RIP my inbox. Edit: thanks for the gold kind stranger
August 2021
I used to be a real ad
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Ben Shapiro counts to one million

So today, for the first time, my little toddler finally counted to ten. Everyone was celebrating, saying how proud they are in my kid, and then Ben Shapiro kicks open the door. "Oh you think it's impressive that they can count to ten? I can count to one million." and then proceeded, in my living room for the next two weeks, to count to one million. He then said "yep, another libtard destroyed" and then curbstomped my kid.
December 2020

Ben Shapiro

Topdecking and Wrecking

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʟʟᴏ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ I ᴀᴍ ғᴀᴍᴏᴜs ᴘᴏʀɴ ᴅɪʀᴇᴄᴛᴏʀ, ᴇᴅᴅʏ ᴘᴀsᴛᴇʀɪɴᴏ. ᴡᴇ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ʟɪᴋᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀɴᴅ ᴋᴀᴄᴇʏᴛʀᴏɴ ᴛᴏ ᴘᴀʀᴛɪᴄɪᴘᴀᴛᴇ ɪɴ ᴏᴜʀ ɴᴇᴡ ᴠɪᴅᴇᴏ " ᴛᴏᴘᴅᴇᴄᴋɪɴ' ɴ ᴡʀᴇᴄᴋɪɴ' " ᴋᴀᴄᴇʏᴛʀᴏɴ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ʙᴇ ᴀ ᴘɪᴢᴢᴀɢɪʀʟ ᴀɴᴅ ʏᴏᴜ sᴀʏ ɴᴏ ᴘɪᴢᴢᴇʀɪɴᴏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴛᴏᴘᴅᴇᴄᴋ ʜᴇʀ
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Roblox has taken over my sons life

Roblox has taken over my sons life, I need someone here to help me, it started off pretty small, he told me he was into this game called Roblox. I looked it over, seemed nice. That was 5 years ago, now my son has locked himself inside his room, using a pile of roblox toy plastic to guard me from opening it. When he comes out (The 1 time he does a week) he carries 5 bottles of empty soda pop filled with human waste and empty bags of food and throws them away. He will not speak to me, and will not leave the house, only will play Roblox. I've tried it all, but he seems to find a way to play roblox. I tired killing the WiFi but he payed someone in robux to let him have his, so he has his own wifi source, and trying to take away his PC causes him to go into a fit of terror, where he'll scream "ROBLOX ESCAPE THE BOSSBABY RAINBOW OBBY FIGDET SPINNER" until he gets it back please someone tell me how I stop this. I've tried doing a thing I call "Good Robloxian Robux" where I give him Robux when he does good things, like come out of his room, or doesn't use more then 20+ hours of wifi a day but it only works so much please someone tell me how I can get my son back, I miss that boy, he's 25 now, and needs a job
March 2021

You guessed it right, I'm SUMMIT1G

twitchquotes: 4Head MY GRAGAS IS BAD 4Head MY CHO'GATH IS FREE 4Head YOU GUESSED IT RIGHT 4Head IM SUMMIT1G 4Head
twitch chat
May 2017
Summt1g

League of Legends

forsenBoys

⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⠹⠟⣩⣭⣤⣬⣍⡻⠁⣤⡄⢤⣤⣬⣉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⣈⢿⠄⠄⠤⠤⢠⣿⡿⣩⣤⣍⢻⡷⡀⣿⡇⠠⠬⢹⣿⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⣷⣯⠺⠿⠿⠿⢸⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⢈⣬⡃⣶⡇⣶⣶⣾⡟⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⡌⢷⣶⣌⠛⢩⣼⡿⠁⠽⡇⢰⣦⠐⣉⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣇⣃⣘⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣍⣋⣐⣛⣋⣴⣀⣀⣀⣻⣿⣄⣋⣁⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡟⢩⣴⣶⢰⣶⣬⠁⣤⣦⣶⣶⣶⣶⢀⣶⣦⠹⣿⢰⣶⡆⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⢺⣿⣐⣒⠘⠛⠂⠈⢻⢐⣒⡒⡒⢘⠊⠻⢇⠹⢨⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡷⠆⠙⠫⠻⠿⡑⠄⣉⡣⠙⠛⠋⠂⢸⣽⡇⠹⣷⠘⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡄⢻⡧⢌⠉⣀⠃⠂⠽⠇⠈⠉⡉⣉⢸⣿⡇⣦⠹⣷⡜⠂⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣈⣀⣀⣀⣠⣆⣀⣀⣀⣈⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣿⣧⣀⣈⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡇⣶⡆⣶⣶⡶⣦⠙⠟⣩⣴⣶⢰⣦⣍⡙⡐⣶⣦⢀⣶⡶⠄⣡⣶⠶⣶⣦⣍⢻ ⡇⣿⡇⣐⡒⣨⡾⠃⢰⣿⢋⣤⣦⡘⡿⠷⢰⠸⢇⡼⣿⢡⠄⣿⣇⣐⠂⠘⢛⣸ ⡇⡿⠁⢛⣛⠻⠶⠄⠸⠍⠸⣿⣿⡇⣰⣻⢰⠇⣾⡌⢀⣾⠷⠌⠙⡓⠛⠿⠤⠙ ⡇⢤⡅⡈⣉⣀⡈⠁⡀⢻⢧⢈⢋⣴⡴⠏⡌⣸⣾⠇⣼⣿⠄⢶⣦⠉⢉⡈⠄⢀ ⣧⣈⣁⣈⣀⣀⣤⣶⣿⣦⣤⣀⣈⣤⣴⣾⣄⣀⣠⣼⣿⣿⣿⣦⣭⣄⣈⣠⣴⣿
November 2021
Forsen

Emote

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