[Copypasta] Never raise a child who likes Jake and Logan Paul

twitchquotes: My son πŸ‘¦πŸ» can be homer sexual πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ My daughter πŸ‘§πŸ» can be lebanese πŸ‘­ But I will NEVER ‼️ Raise a child πŸ‘ΆπŸ» who likes Jake and Logan Paul πŸ™…πŸ»β€
twitch chat
August 2018
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

is that… a GIRL?!!!?

is that… a GIRL?!!!? Uhhhhhhhhhhhh girls? uhhhhhhhhhhhhh like, here? *starts sweating* uuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh *starts drooling* uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh *wide eyed* UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *starts farting* UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *starts shitting with bloodshot eyes* UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *poopie leaking out of my shorts* UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *starts convulsing which makes the shit run down my shaved legs even faster* UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-UUU-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH-HHH *gets a boner* UUUHHH-UHHH-UHHHHH-UUUUHHHH-UHHHH-UUUUHHHHHHH-UUUUHHHHHHHHH-UHHHHH-UUUUUUHHHHHHHHH *passes out*
May 2022

Romanian Salt Baron

twitchquotes: POLICE REPORT - Canadian Mounties have at last apprehended the "Romanian Salt Baron" after suspiciously salty whining was heard outside of a dingy apartment in Toronto. The Salt Baron, a morose, balding gypsy man, was at the time playing a children's card game when Mounties burst through the door. The man attempted to resist by "brofisting" the officials, but his scrawny vegan arms had no effect. The man's wife then assumed her true Succubus form and escaped into the Nether. More at 11.
twitch chat
July 2016
Kripp

Copypastus Totalus

twitchquotes: β•°( Ν‘Β° ΝœΚ– Ν‘Β° )γ€β”€β”€β˜†*:γƒ»οΎŸ Copypastus Totalus!! I can't believe people actually take time out of their day to copy and paste messages instead of contributing to chat. What kind of inhuman degenerate would take pleasure in wasting valuable chat space? Quite FrankerZly, it's discusseding.
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp

Henry Dongerman and his pet donger Mr Mittens

twitchquotes: Hey my name is Henry Dongerman I lost my pet donger. Here's a picture of him [α•™ΰΌΌΰΊˆΩ„ΝœΰΊˆΰΌ½α•—] if you can help find him I would be eternally grateful he means the world to me. Mr. Mittens is his name if it helps share this around and pray to lord donger to help find him. His favorite song is α•™ΰΌΌΰΊˆΩ„ΰΊˆΰΌ½α•— HARDER BETTER FASTER DONGER α•™ΰΌΌΰΊˆΩ„ΰΊˆΰΌ½α•— so try playing that he may come
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Parody names for the ACDC song Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap

Atrocious Acts Accomplished at Affordable Rates Barbaric Business Bartered at Bargain Costs Contemptible Coups Carried out at Cut Rates Dastardly Doings Dealt at Discounted Payments Evil Endeavors Enacted at Extraordinary Deals Filthy Feats Furnished through Fair Expenses Gross Games Garnished through Good Contracts Heinous Hooliganism Haggled to Humble Budget Immoral Incidents Issued at Inconsequential Fees Jarring Jobs Judged Justly Priced Kriminal Kapers Kompleted at Kompetitive Prices Licentious Larceny Licensed at Low Tariffs Malicious Missions Made with Minimal Resources Nefarious Notions Negotiated at Negligible Charges Ominous Operations Outsourced at Optimal Prices Perilous Performances Priced at Pocket Change Questionable Quests Quarried at Quackpot Terms Rambunctious Rackets Realized at Reduced Figures Sinister Shenanigans Supplied at Satisfactory Pay Thuggish Things Terminated at Trivial Fees Unscrupulous Undertakings Unleashed at Unusual Discount Villanous Ventures Valued at Vexing Costs. Wicked Work Waged at Wee Fares Xecrable Xploits Xecuted Xtremely Inexpensively Yucky Yerks Yielded as Year-End Sales Zany Zinging Zoned for Zero Markup
August 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing