[Copypasta] Never raise a child who likes Jake and Logan Paul

twitchquotes: My son πŸ‘¦πŸ» can be homer sexual πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ My daughter πŸ‘§πŸ» can be lebanese πŸ‘­ But I will NEVER ‼️ Raise a child πŸ‘ΆπŸ» who likes Jake and Logan Paul πŸ™…πŸ»β€
twitch chat
August 2018
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

spagootie

sometimes i like to pronounce spaghetti as "spagootie" and it has been working out fantastically so far. honestly, this single change has improved my life more than you could ever imagine. i highly suggest everyone try this out and see where your life goes. probably make all your dreams come true in like 5 business days. next time you have a big bowl of piping hot marina drenched pasta in front of you say "spagootie time!!" or maybe something like "im so ready for this spagootie!" and see where the magic will take you.
April 2022

You can't stop what's coming leafboy

You can't stop what's coming leafboy. I walk all over leaves every autumn, you think this year will be any different? Your flag is a fucking leaf. You chose the one part of the tree that dies every year. Not only that, but it's one of hundreds of leaves, thousands if it's a big tree. All dead come winter. Every winter. A vicious cycle. Totally insignificant. As soon as the tree has had it's way with you you are cast to the Earth to be trod by all other living things. Ants? They not only stomp about you, they will steal your corpse and use it for their people. Birds steal your lifeless shell with impunity. Leaves not only die once, but every year. A brave man dies only once, but leaves die a thousand deaths, or at least 20 or 30 if the tree lives that long. Perhaps more. Every year, leafs crunch beneath my boot. This year shall be no different. So it shall be written. So it shall be done. The day of the rake is at hand because every day is the day of the rake and has always been.
January 2021

A boy asked a girl in a library

twitchquotes: A boy asked a girl in a library, "Do you mind if I sit beside you"? The girl Answered with a loud angry voice; "I don't want to spend the night with you!! All the people in the library started staring at the boy and he was embarrassed. After minutes the girl walked quietly to the guy's table and said to him I study psychology and I know what man is think, I guess you felt embarrassed,right? The guy responded with a loud voice :$300 for one night That's too much!! and all the people in the library looked at the girl in shock and the guy whispered in her ears, "I study law and I know how to make someone guilty.
twitch chat
August 2020

NA is so ba... I should brush my teeth

twitchquotes: SMOrc NA is so ba... SMOrc maybe i should brush my teeth SMOrc NA is s... SMOrc maybe i should floss SMOrc fk give me dentures SMOrc
twitch chat
April 2016
Kripp

Classic

EU vs NA

Please quit calling it "Victory Fap"

twitchquotes: Would you guys please quit calling it "Victory Fap"? I find it very offensive, and I'm sure Rania does too, that you think Kripp can only become aroused through dominance in a child's card game. Please grow up chat, thanks
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing