[Copypasta] In Japan, heart surgeon

Number one. Steady hand. One day, yakuza boss need new heart. I do operation. But mistake! Yakuza boss die! Yakuza very mad! I hide fishing boat, come to America. No English, no food, no money. Darryl give me job. Now I have house, American car and new woman. Darryl save life. My big secret. I kill yakuza boss on purpose. I good surgeon. The best!
April 2021

Classic

(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Tired of Weebs? No problem!

twitchquotes: Tired of Weebs? No problem! Here at Weeb Deflectorsβ„’ we can shield your Twitch chat Queue from incoming Weebs with our new patent-pending WeebShieldβ„’ Technology! Our shield will bounce incoming Weebs right back to the dark place they came from (definitely not HEARTHSTONE), causing them to effectively Spread their disease called anime to themselves! Buy 24/7 protection now for only $24.99/month!
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Hey subs, it's me walking with my $5, don't mind me

twitchquotes: Hey subs! [Μ²Μ…$Μ²Μ…(Μ²Μ…5)Μ²Μ…$Μ²Μ…]γƒ½ΰΌΌΰΊˆΩ„ΝœΰΊˆΰΌ½ΰΈ‡ It's me walking with my $5, don't mind me.
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plebs vs subs

Mario poops mods

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Just taking Reynad for a walk

twitchquotes: β•­( Ν‘Β° ΝœΚ– Ν‘Β°)β•―β•²_____ PJSalt Oh, don't mind me, just taking Reynad for a walk.
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salty

Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise?

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twitch chat
April 2017

Tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise

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