twitchquotes:
MOSHI MOSHI π 
RUNNING LOW ON CUTIES π NEED BACKUP π ARIGATO π
RUNNING LOW ON CUTIES π NEED BACKUP π ARIGATO π
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I used to be a real ad
More Classic Copypastas
Natalie Portman is the reason I work out
Natalie Portman is the reason I work out. I have this fantasy where we start talking at the Vanity Fair Oscars party bar. We exchange a few pleasantries. She asks what I do. I say I loved her in New Girl. She laughs. I get my drink.
"Well, see ya," I say and walk away. I've got her attention now. How many guys voluntarily leave a conversation with Natalie Portman? She touches her neck as she watches me leave.
Later, as the night's dragged on and the coterie of gorgeous narcissists grows increasingly loose, she finds me on the balcony, my bowtie undone, smoking a cigarette.
"Got a spare?" she asks.
"What's in it for me?" I say as I hand her one of my little white ladies. She smiles.
"Conversation with me, duh."
I laugh.
"What's so funny?" she protests.
"Nothing, nothing... It's just... don't you grow tired of the egos?"
"You get used to it," she says, lighting her cigarette and handing me back the lighter.
"What would you do if you weren't an actress?" I ask.
"Teaching, I think."
"And if I was your student, what would I be learning?"
"Discipline," she says quickly, looking up into my eyes, before changing the subject. "Where are you from?"
"Bermuda," I say.
"Oh wow. That's lovely."
"It's ok," I admit. "Not everything is to my liking."
"What could possibly be not to your liking in Bermuda?" she inquires.
"I don't like sand," I tell her. "It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere."
Classic
A girl... AND a gamer?
A girl.... AND a gamer? Whoa mama! Hummina hummina hummina bazooooooooing! *eyes pop out* AROOOOOOOOGA! *jaw drops tongue rolls out* WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF *tongue bursts out of the outh uncontrollably leaking face and everything in reach* WURBLWUBRLBWURblrwurblwurlbrwubrlwburlwbruwrlblwublr *tiny cupid shoots an arrow through heart* Ahhhhhhhhhhh me lady... *heart in the shape of a heart starts beating so hard you can see it through shirt* ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum *milk truck crashes into a bakery store in the background spiling white liquid and dough on the streets* BABY WANTS TO FUCK *inhales from the gas tank* honka honka honka honka *masturabtes furiously* ohhhh my gooooodd~
Classic
American Test Passed
twitchquotes:
β Obesity β π₯π« β Laziness β Stupidity β π΅ β McDonald's β Donald Trump β $70k College β Bad healthcare β Bad food β Bad music β Fahrenheit β Pounds β Inches β AMERICAN TEST PASSED
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Classic
EU vs NA
I'm just a memer
twitchquotes:
γ½γ½ο½γ½ο½γγ½γ½ο½γ½ο½γγ½γ½ο½γ½γγ½γ½ο½γ½ο½γγ½γ½ο½γ½ο½γο½γγ½γ½ο½γ½ο½γγ½γ½ο½γ½ο½γγ½γ½ο½γ½ο½γγ½γ½ο½γ½ο½γγ½γ½ο½γ½ο½γγ½γ½ο½γ½ο½γγ½γ½ 
β just a memer γ½ο½γ½ο½γγ½γ½ο½γ½ο½γο½γ½ο½γγ½γ½ο½γ½ο½γγ½γ½ο½γ½γγ½γ½
β just a memer γ½ο½γ½ο½γγ½γ½ο½γ½ο½γο½γ½ο½γγ½γ½ο½γ½ο½γγ½γ½ο½γ½γγ½γ½
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Forsen
Classic
This is the world we have wrought
twitchquotes:
The year is 2129; humans can only communicate through increasingly garbled copy-pasta. A man approaches and says "ire: βββ 10 ο½ο½ο½ο½ο½ο½
ο½ο½ο½ο½ ff β EKT βΎ β ΒΈ. ?" In confusion, I reply "AT ASCII ΰΊΩΝΩΝΰΊΰΊΰΌ½ΰΌ½οΎοΎ HA Κα΄Κα΄ γ½ΰΌΌΰ²’_ β βΰΈ±β)β TUCK F (β‘βΏβ‘βΏ)". This is the world we have wrought.
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