Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Classic Copypastas
Oh my gourd, I am financially ruined (agricultural futures)
I have lost everything, and I'm not sure how to continue. This summer I invested $17,500 (six months salary and my entire life savings) into ornamental gourd futures, hoping to capitalize on this lucrative emerging industry. After watching a video about Vincent Kosuga and his monopoly on onions, I decided I'd try to do something similar with another vegetable. I did some research and found out many agricultural forecasters expected this year's gourd yield would be far smaller than the past, due to deteriorating soil conditions in central Mexico and a warmer-than-average spring. At first, demand soared around Halloween and prices skyrocketed, but the gourd bubble burst on November 12th. Unfortunately, the coronavirus caused a massive drop-off in demand due to fewer families decorating their tables for thanksgiving, and prices plummeted. I had invested early enough that I thought I would still be fine, but then on the morning of December 2nd, a new email in my inbox caused my stomach to turn into a pretzel. The massive gourd shipment from Argentina, scheduled for early March, had arrived. I was planning on selling off my futures right before this, in February, but this ruined everything. To top it off, the gourds in this shipment were absolutely gargantuan, some topping 4 pounds each, causing the price-per-pound to drop like an anchor into the range of 6 cents per pound. I am ruined.
Classic
WallStreetBets
This is the world we have wrought
twitchquotes:
The year is 2129; humans can only communicate through increasingly garbled copy-pasta. A man approaches and says "ire: ███ 10 ｓｔｒｏｋｅ ｄｉｃｋ ff ☑ EKT ☾ ☆ ¸. ?" In confusion, I reply "AT ASCII ຈل͜ل͜ຈຈ༽༽ﾉﾉ HA ʙᴏʟᴀ ヽ༼ಢ_ ♌ ❛ั∗)◞ TUCK F (◡‿◡✿)". This is the world we have wrought.
twitch chat
Classic
Hey Kripp-kun. It's me Samantha-chan!
twitchquotes:
H-hey Kripp-kun. It's me Samantha-chan! I know you don't know me that well, I sit in the column closest to the door and in the back row. Oh yeah, duh... LoL, we have Chemistry together with Ms. Raphatello. Ughh, she's such a b****! Anyways I'm being such a baka (LoL that's Japanese for idiot!). Oh, do you like Anime too? I'm sure if you gave it a chance you would too if you don't already watch it ~_~. I always look at you in Chemistry and you never seem to notice me... BAHHH WHAT AM I DOING?!?! GOMENASAI Artour-kun (gomenasai means sorry in Japanese ^.^). Just wanted to say hello and I really love your stream! Good luck Kripp-kun!
twitch chat
Kripp
Weebs
Classic
My daughter was born with a hearing impairment
twitchquotes:
My daughter was born with a hearing impairment than ultimately left her deaf shortly after birth. I have been working for years to pay for a new surgery that would allow her to hear again. Today was her 8th birthday and I managed to get her what she's always wanted for her birthday, the sense of hearing. I decided to let her listen in on what Daddy has been watching late at night and I turn on your stream and what do I hear? Silence. Now she's crying thinking she's deaf again, Nice job Kripp.
twitch chat
Kripp
Classic
Le Toucan has arrived
░░░░░░░░▄▄▄▀▀▀▄▄███▄░░░░░░░░░░░░░░
░░░░░▄▀▀░░░░░░░▐░▀██▌░░░░░░░░░░░░░
░░░▄▀░░░░▄▄███░▌▀▀░▀█░░░░░░░░░░░░░
░░▄█░░▄▀▀▒▒▒▒▒▄▐░░░░█▌░░░░░░░░░░░░
░▐█▀▄▀▄▄▄▄▀▀▀▀▌░░░░░▐█▄░░░░░░░░░░░
░▌▄▄▀▀░░░░░░░░▌░░░░▄███████▄░░░░░░
░░░░░░░░░░░░░▐░░░░▐███████████▄░░░
░░░░░le░░░░░░░▐░░░░▐█████████████▄
░░░░toucan░░░░░░▀▄░░░▐█████████████▄
░░░░░░has░░░░░░░░▀▄▄███████████████
░░░░░arrived░░░░░░░░░░░░█▀██████░░