[Copypasta] My BODY is machine that turns diary products into spicy liquid diarrhea

My πŸ€Έβ€β™‚οΈBODYπŸ‹οΈβ€β™€οΈ is a πŸš‚πŒπ€π‚π‡πˆππ„πŸš‚ that turns πŸ„π’Ήπ’Άπ’Ύπ“‡π“Ž π“…π“‡π‘œπ’Ήπ“Šπ’Έπ“‰π“ˆπŸ₯› into ➑ πŸ”₯β“ˆβ“…β’Ύβ’Έβ“ŽπŸ”₯ πŸ³π“π’Ύπ“†π“Šπ’Ύπ’ΉπŸ’¦ πŸ’©πŸ’©π”»π•€π”Έβ„β„β„π”Όπ”ΈπŸ’ͺπŸ’ͺ
March 2021

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What happened to this ad? :(
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Bullish market makes me hard

When the stocks πŸ“ŠπŸ“ go up πŸ“ˆπŸ’Έ, my dick goes too πŸ†β¬†οΈπŸ˜³. Bullish πŸ‚ market 🏬 makes me hard πŸ¦΄πŸ’¦. All the countries πŸ³οΈπŸ΄πŸ΄β€β˜ οΈπŸπŸš©πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆπŸ³οΈβ€βš§οΈπŸ‡ΊπŸ‡³ try to recover πŸ”„ from corona 🦠 so the money πŸ’°πŸ’΅πŸ’Έ flows 🌬 into my pocket πŸ’³. Soon πŸ”œ there will be a crash πŸ“‰πŸ˜­πŸ₯ΊπŸ˜– and the bears 🐻 will crawl 🚼 out of their holes πŸ•³. Then they cut off my greedy dick βœ‚οΈπŸ†πŸ©Έ if I don’t ❌ eat ’em out πŸ‘…πŸ˜Έ. I must turn into a bear πŸ‚βž‘οΈπŸ» and make 🀌🏼 more money πŸ’°πŸ’΅πŸ’Έ and eat some honey 🐻🍯. When I’m done βœ… I’ll throw a party πŸŽ‰πŸ·πŸΎ and eat your ass πŸ‘…πŸ‘.
October 2021

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WallStreetBets

If my girl and my fidget spinners are both drowning

twitchquotes: If my girlπŸ‘§πŸ˜ and my fidget spinners πŸ’―πŸ”₯ are both drowning🌊😦 and I could only save oneπŸ˜„β˜οΈοΈ you can Catch me letting it spin at my girls funeralπŸ˜…πŸ‘»πŸ’€ Cause it's fidget spinner or catch a fade πŸ™πŸ‘Š
twitch chat
May 2017

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Fidget Spinner

President's Day Emoji Pasta

ITS PRESIDENTS DAY SLUTS!! πŸš¨πŸš¨πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡ΈπŸ‡ΊπŸ‡ΈπŸ‡ΊπŸ‡ΈπŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έtime to hop onto that founding father dickπŸ†πŸ†πŸ†πŸ‘΄πŸ»πŸ‘΄πŸ»πŸ‘΄πŸ»πŸ‘΄πŸ»or should i say founding DADDIES!!!πŸ˜©πŸ˜©πŸ˜©πŸ™ŒπŸ™ŒπŸ‘…πŸ‘…πŸ’¦πŸ’¦ out here tryna get rammed from behind πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘harder than the rock of MOUNT RUSHMOREβ˜„οΈβ˜„οΈβ›°πŸ”πŸ”george washington mightve been able to survive the harsh β„οΈβ„οΈπŸŒ¬wintersπŸŒ¬β„οΈβ„οΈ of valley forge, but can he handle the conditions between the sheetsπŸŒͺπŸ’‘β“β“β“be the monica Lewinsky πŸ™‹πŸ»to my bill clintonπŸ™‹β€β™‚οΈ baby and i wont deny i had πŸ†πŸ†β™‹οΈsexual relationsβ™‹οΈπŸ†πŸ† with you!!! crack the whip down harder on your bae than ronald Reagan did on welfare programsπŸ’ΈπŸ’ΈπŸ€·πŸΌβ€β™‚οΈπŸ€·πŸΌβ€β™‚οΈπŸ€·πŸΌβ€β™‚οΈβœπŸ»send this to FIVE of your baddest presidential PRINCESSESπŸ‘ΈπŸΌπŸ‡ΊπŸ‡ΈπŸ‡ΊπŸ‡ΈπŸ‘ΈπŸΌwho will throw the nastiest neckπŸ†πŸ†πŸ˜©πŸ˜©πŸ™ŒπŸ™ŒπŸŒ¬πŸ’¦ on this AMERICAN BEAUT OF A DAYπŸ˜ŠπŸ˜ŠπŸ’™πŸš¨β€οΈ if you get 10 back, be prepared for the president to enter the oval office of you PUSSY tonightπŸ±πŸ±πŸ’¦πŸ’¦πŸ™ŒπŸ˜©πŸ˜©πŸ˜©πŸ˜©πŸ˜©πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡ΈπŸ‡ΊπŸ‡ΈπŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ
February 2024

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Holiday Emoji

President's Day

i didnt fuck my cat emojified

twitchquotes: iπŸ™‹β€β™‚οΈdidn’t 🚫 fuck πŸ†πŸ’¦my cat😾. i didnt 🚫cum πŸ†πŸ’¦on my cat😼 . i didnt❌ put πŸ‘‰ my Dick πŸ† anywhere 🌎near my catπŸ™€ . Ive never βŒπŸ™…β€β™€οΈdone anything weird ❓❓❓with my πŸ’β€β™‚οΈπŸ˜»cats. I promised🀝 myself 🀞i wasnt going to make πŸ’’πŸ’’apology 😿 videosπŸ“Ή after last yearsπŸ“… thing so im just trying to be as short and honest πŸ‘ with this πŸ‘…πŸ˜Όas possible. (1/?)
twitch chat
March 2019

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Ocean Man

twitchquotes: OCEAN MAN 🌊 😍 Take me by the hand βœ‹ lead me to the land that you understand πŸ™Œ 🌊 OCEAN MAN 🌊 😍 The voyage 🚲 to the corner of the 🌎 globe is a real trip πŸ‘Œ 🌊 OCEAN MAN 🌊 😍 The crust of a tan man πŸ‘³ imbibed by the sand πŸ‘ Soaking up the πŸ’¦ thirst of the land πŸ’―
twitch chat
September 2016

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Text-to-Speech Playing