twitchquotes:
If harambe ๐ and my girl ๐ง ๐ both drowning ๐ฑ ๐ and I can only save one ๐ค ๐ฌ Catch me at my girl funeral ๐ ๐ป ๐น with my dick out ๐ ๐ฏ ๐ ๐
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(โฬฟฤนฬฏโโฌโดโฌโด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Japan heart surgeon and yakuza boss
In Japan ๐ฏ๐ต , heart surgeon โค๏ธ๐จโโ๏ธ . Number one ๐ญโ๏ธ . Steady hand๐ณโ๏ธ. One day, Yakuza boss ๐๐ปneed ๐ heart๐. I do operation๐ชโ๏ธ. But, mistake๐ฑ! Yakuza boss die๐ต๐ช! Yakuza very mad๐ฟ. I hide๐ in fishing boat๐๐ฃ๐ปโโ๏ธ, come to America๐๐๐บ๐ธ. No english๐ค, no food๐ฉ, no money๐๐ซ๐ฒ. Darryl ๐จ๐ฟgive me job๐๐จ๐ปโ๐ผ. Now I have house๐ก, American car ๐ , and new woman ๐๐ฑ๐ปโโ๏ธ. Darryl ๐จ๐ฟsave lifeโ. My big secret๐: I kill โ ๏ธyakuza boss on purpose๐. I good ๐surgeon. The best๐๐ฏ!
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Classic
GUYS PLEASE HELP! I NEED HELP!
twitchquotes:
WHEN I SAT DOWN โฌ๏ธ TO PEE ๐ฆ THERE WAS A BUG ๐ IN THE TOILET ๐ฝ BUT I THOUGHT ๐ญ IT WAS DROWNED ๐๐ป โโโโ N WHEN I GOT UP โฌ๏ธ IT WASN'T โ THERE 
IM SOBBING ๐ญ IS IT IN MY FUCKING ๐ BUTTHOLE ๐โญ WHERE IS ITโ๏ธโ๏ธโ๏ธ
IM SOBBING ๐ญ IS IT IN MY FUCKING ๐ BUTTHOLE ๐โญ WHERE IS ITโ๏ธโ๏ธโ๏ธ
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Gulugulu in your stomach
twitchquotes:
Doโ not ๐ฐ eat ๐ fish ๐ after ๐ถ u ๐ฏ drink water ๐บ bc ๐ฐ it can ๐ป swim in ๐ ur stomach ๐ฎ and u will ๐ฒ feel ๐ gulugulu in ur stomach ๐๐ณ๐ผ
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my brother is the best cook
twitchquotes:
my๐ฝ brother ๐ฑ is the best๐ฅcook ๐งโ๐ณbecause ๐ฃwith 2๏ธโฃ eggs๐ฅ๐ฅ1๏ธโฃsausage๐ญand a cup๐ฅof milk๐ผhe๐ฑcan fillโฌ๏ธmy๐ฉtummy๐คฐfor9๏ธโฃ๐ฃmonths๐
๐ฅฐ๐คฉ
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Emoji Pasta
OMG you're so FUNNY so quirky
๐๐OMG ๐ youโre so FUNNY ๐คฃ ๐คฃ so quirky ๐๐ ๐คช so different ๐คฉabsolute crackhead energy ๐คช๐คช comedic genius๐ง ๐ I literally canโt โ breathe ๐ญ iโm crying dude ๐ญ๐ญ that was so hilarious ๐ u really got the whole squad laughing ๐จโ๐ฉโ๐งโ๐ฆ๐๐ฉโ๐ฉโ๐ฆโ๐ฆ๐๐จโ๐จโ๐งโ๐ฆ high IQ comedy ๐ง ๐ง howโd you come up with that ๐ง๐ really original work ๐ never seen ๐ or heard ๐ anything like that before ๐ ๐ ๐ great ๐ job ๐๐ keep up the funnies ๐๐คฃ๐ i love you ๐ ๐ youโre my inspiration ๐คฉ๐คฉ๐คฉ if only i were as funny ๐ or smart ๐ค or cool ๐ as you ๐ but its whatever Iโll continue to watch ๐๐๐ your content ๐ฅ๐คณ because it โNEVER EVERโ fails to make me laugh ๐๐ thank you ๐ for existing ๐ and doing what you do โค๏ธโค๏ธ