Holy shit Kim Kardashian is about to be single. I've waited so long for this moment. This is my chance, my opportunity. God is real. I should chill with the god talk because she's probably over that stuff but im fucking hyped. I am going to shoot my shot. I am not black so my chances are less but I have been doing push ups, eating vitamins and controlling my jacking off.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
My husband of 5 years bought me Reddit Gold for my anniversary
My 5-Year anniversary with my husband was last week. The traditional gift for 5 years is silverware. I wanted a new set and told my husband which he could get me as a gift. I knew he wanted an Apple Watch and bought that as my gift to him.
On the day of our anniversary, I logged onto Reddit to find dozens of my posts and comments guilded. I found it odd as I donβt post terribly often and the guilded comments were old. Itβs also the first time Iβve received Reddit gold.
When the time came to exchange gifts, he gleefully opened his Apple Watch and begin setting it up. I figured Iβm all the excitement he forgot to give me my gift so I gently prodded him. He told me to check Reddit.
Ladies and Gentlemen, my husband GUILDED me 24 times as an anniversary gift. Heβs a bit of a jokester, so I figured my real gift was coming.
But Reddit, itβs been a week. Do I say something? Buy the silverware myself? Some combination of the two? I feel if I donβt say something then the cycle will repeat itself.
I tried to go help
Damn saw this one guy getting beat up by 2 other dudes today so I tried to go help, didnβt stand a chance against the 3 of us.
AITA for not showing up to my own funeral?
So I (74M) was recently hit by a car (2014 Honda) and died. My wife (5F) organized me a funeral (cost $2747) without asking me (74M) at all. I (74M) was unable to make it because I (74M) was dead (17 days). At the funeral I heard my dad (15M) and other family members talking about how they wish I could be there and now I feel bad for not showing up. AITA?
AITA
Hello Michael, this is your cat, "small cat"
GG EZ
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