[Copypasta] Holy shit Kim Kardashian is about to be single

Holy shit Kim Kardashian is about to be single. I've waited so long for this moment. This is my chance, my opportunity. God is real. I should chill with the god talk because she's probably over that stuff but im fucking hyped. I am going to shoot my shot. I am not black so my chances are less but I have been doing push ups, eating vitamins and controlling my jacking off.
January 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Hi Toast this is Mrs. Laurent - Fiora's mom

twitchquotes: Hi Toast this is Mrs. Laurent - Fiora's mom. I noticed you have been picking my girl for your team in gym class. Fiora has been having a really tough time since her dad and I split up, and I know how much it means to her. You could have been rerolling saying: "We're never taking Fiora." It warms my tired heart that you would show such kindness and give a struggling girl with a good, noble soul a chance. Bless you Toastfor never giving up on my dear little girl
twitch chat
July 2019
DisguisedToast

Teamfight Tactics

I've been unvaccinated for 9 months now

I've been unvaccinated for 9 months now, moving from place to place, keeping ahead of the vaxmaxers, never staying anywhere too long, never letting my face become known. "It's great being vaxmaxed isn't it" the shopkeep says vacantly, to nobody in particular. In keeping with the act I reply to the Heinz Baked Beans Substitute 6 Pack (No Plastic) in my hand, something unrelated, with what I hope is a slightly bemused tone. It takes a lot longer to do my shopping these days, I can't simply march through the shop in an orderly fashion, taking what I need in a single trip, I have to absent mindedly shuffle back and forward between the aisles, never really displaying any intent. As unpresent as they are, the vaxmaxed would notice if I was too focused, too alert. A loud smashing sound in the distance almost blows my cover, I notice, and focus on the sound. The vaxmaxed around me slowly aim their distant gaze on me, but I'm able to save myself, I continue my neck jerk and turn it in to a series of spasms, I drop to the floor convulsing, the vaxmaxed around me quickly lose interest and continue on with their day. "That means it's working" one elderly lady comments to her milk as she passes. I continue the charade long enough to filter out most of the vaxmaxed sharing the aisle. It takes a while, and no insubstantial amount of sweat on my part, but I make it to the checkout. A morbidly obese woman directs the horde at the tills, seemingly oblivious to the cacophony of aberrant scan noises and blinking red lights above the entirely self service super checkout. I wait dutifully, not wanting to be noticed, not wanting to be set upon by the Asda Security Vax Checker team, it had taken all my best bluffing to get past them at the door, I almost chuckled when they believed my vax card was in the post but it was quickly stifled, a chuckled would have given me away, a chuckle would have seen me held down and injected with science juice.
April 2022

COVID

Coronavirus

To be clear, in Project A, shooting matters

To be clear, in Project A, shooting matters. You don’t kill with abilities. Abilities create tactical opportunities to take the right shot. Characters have abilities that augment their gunplay, instead of fighting directly with their abilities.
September 2020

Valorant

only the realest player will dunk this

twitchquotes: TriHard / πŸ€ TRUE BALLER TEST only the realest player will dunk this πŸ—‘
twitch chat
March 2018

Chat Test

Purify is a great card

twitchquotes: Hey guys blizzard here and we just wanted to say purify is a great card if you combo it with ancient watcher you spend 2 cards to get a 4 mana 4/5! think of all that value... If you want even more value you can try it with zombie chow! its a 3 mana 2/3!!!! Finally we just wanted to say we thought it would be better as a rare but we realized priest is not the best in arena so we made it common so almost all priests will have it!...
twitch chat
August 2016
PlayHearthstone

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing