Holy shit Kim Kardashian is about to be single. I've waited so long for this moment. This is my chance, my opportunity. God is real. I should chill with the god talk because she's probably over that stuff but im fucking hyped. I am going to shoot my shot. I am not black so my chances are less but I have been doing push ups, eating vitamins and controlling my jacking off.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Vegetron Ruler and Protector of all plant matter
twitchquotes:
Hello Kripp, This is Vegetron Ruler and Protector of all plant matter in the galaxy. I command you to stop being a p*ssy and eat meat, instead of eating all of my relatives. If you don't, I will be super angry at you. You've been warned.
twitch chat
Kripp
Hi Michael, it's the ghost of Abraham Lincoln here
twitchquotes:
Hi Michael, it's the ghost of Abraham Lincoln here, 16th president of the USA. Just wondering if you can let me see your minimap. I realize you don't like "ghosting" but maybe you can make an exception for me. Sorry for spooking you.
twitch chat
imaqtpie
You've been visited by Hellbear Smasher of fortune
twitchquotes:
ʕ ͡·ᴥ ͡· ʔ You've been visited by Hellbear Smasher of fortune. 
your paws and copy paste this message 5 times without getting banned by mods and luck be with you for the next year ʕ ͡·ᴥ ͡· ʔ
your paws and copy paste this message 5 times without getting banned by mods and luck be with you for the next year ʕ ͡·ᴥ ͡· ʔ
twitch chat
Response to the Vaporeon copypasta (Vaporeons are dangerous)
Hey guys did you know that in terms of water Pokemon inland, Vaporeon would be very capable of hunting grown humans?
Their bodies being the size of a medium dog and weight are just enough to pounce on a man and throw him to the ground. Their bulky stats would allow them to shrug off and outlast any attempts by the human to fight them off, and that's not getting even into moves like Hydro Pump and Scald. But that's not all these water dogs have up their sleeves.
Their bodies being so similar to water not only lets them hide in bodies of water and become nearly invisible to catch prey off guard, but allows them to enter the body through almost any orifice. Things do not get any better once a Vaporeon is inside of you. If asphyxiation doesn't kill you, the internal bleeding and displacement of internal organs certainly will. In addition, they are able to learn Charm, allowing them to take advantage of certain... desires humans may have and create even more opportunities to go in for the kill.
But wait, there's more. Since Vaporeon is an omnivore, its cells would need to be able to digest proteins, such as those in meat. This only opens even more possibilities as to what these creatures are capable of.
Pokemon
SMOrc
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⠀⠐⠻⣿⣿⣟⣛⡻⠶⣦⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡗⢿⣿⣿⢙⠛⣃⠬⢄⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀
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