[Copypasta] Holy shit Kim Kardashian is about to be single

Holy shit Kim Kardashian is about to be single. I've waited so long for this moment. This is my chance, my opportunity. God is real. I should chill with the god talk because she's probably over that stuff but im fucking hyped. I am going to shoot my shot. I am not black so my chances are less but I have been doing push ups, eating vitamins and controlling my jacking off.
January 2021
Kim Kardashian rumored to divorce Kanye West
I used to be a real ad
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Trolling My Church with Among Us

So today at church the pastor was preaching about the crucifixion of Jesus and when he said that Judas would betray Jesus, I blurted out "JUDAS IS THE IMPOSTER! HE'S SUS!" and did a big wide grin (like the "when the imposter is sus" meme). The pastor then said "What are you talking about?" So I yelled "EMERGENCY MEETING! HE DOESN'T GET THE AMONG US REFERENCE!" and then I explained the joke. The pastor, not amused, told me to sit down. I sat back down but then later when he said that Jesus was accused of blasphemy and crucified I couldn't contain myself and I yelled out "JESUS WAS NOT THE IMPOSTER!" and when the pastor told me to stop disrupting I said "THE PASTOR IS SUS, HE DOESN'T GET IT" and I then told everyone to download Reddit for funny Among Us memes. That's when the pastor told me to leave for causing disruptions. I said "WAIT! I'M NOT SUS THOUGH! WHY ARE YOU EJECTING ME?" and then I said "WHEN THE PASTOR IS SUS!" And did the hilarious grin from the meme. After that I got kicked out but it was worth it because I just trolled them all with Among Us.
March 2021

Trolling with Among Us

Among Us / Amogus

Teaching him how to throw so well

twitchquotes: Hey xQc my son is a huge fan of yours. Anyway over the past few days of watching you play this game hes got much better at playing baseball (he plays in the 11-13 year old division). I just wanted to stop by and thank you for teaching him how to throw so well.
twitch chat
October 2018
xQcOW

Overwatch

Ban hammer

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
ascii art
November 2014

Roe v. Wade Emoji Pasta

HEY ๐Ÿ‘‹๐Ÿ˜ฉ there comrade ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ชcummy! the ๐Ÿ‘น supreme ๐Ÿ† cock๐Ÿ› has ๐Ÿ—ณvoted to strike ๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€โš–๏ธโŒ›๏ธdown the ๐ŸŒˆ sexy ๐Ÿคง๐Ÿคฐ๐Ÿปroe v. wade decision ๐Ÿ˜according ๐Ÿคค๐Ÿฆถ๐Ÿปto a opinion ๐Ÿ–Šwrittenโœ๏ธ๐Ÿ’ธ by daddy ๐Ÿ’…๐Ÿป๐Ÿ™ˆ sammy ๐Ÿ‘ถ๐Ÿป๐Ÿ™…๐Ÿปโ€โ™‚๏ธ aLITo. ๐Ÿท๐Ÿ’จ the opinion is a ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐ŸŒ FULL THROATED ๐Ÿ“ฒโค๏ธโ€๐Ÿ”ฅGIRTHY ๐Ÿ† contraDICKtion ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿ‘ of the 1973 ๐Ÿ‘ฟ๐Ÿ‘Ždecision that ๐Ÿ’๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ๐Ÿ‘Œ guaranteed federal ๐Ÿ˜ค cocks-titutuinal ๐Ÿ˜ณ protection ๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ’„of abortion rights!!! โค๏ธโ€๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿซกeveryone who ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿ’ฆ woke remember ๐Ÿ™‹โœŠ๐Ÿป๐Ÿค” to fund ๐Ÿ’ธ๐Ÿฅต planned parenthood and ๐ŸŒช๐Ÿ‘ผ donate to ๐Ÿง‘๐Ÿผโ€๐Ÿผ๐Ÿค‘abortion funds! get yo ๐Ÿ“ธuturuses ๐Ÿ’‹๐Ÿ‘ turnt you ๐Ÿ’ƒwhore! ๐ŸŒญevery whore knows ๐Ÿง ๐Ÿผthat everyone ๐Ÿ”œshould have ๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€โš•๏ธ๐Ÿฅaccess to safe ๐Ÿ™ ๐ŸŒŽabortions โค๏ธ๐Ÿ˜˜ if they choose ๐Ÿ’…๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘€ to have one. ๐Ÿ‘‘๐Ÿ‘นsend to ten ๐Ÿ˜ฌ๐Ÿ™of your closest ๐Ÿšฑ๐Ÿ…พ๏ธWHORES to secure abortion ๐Ÿ“ซ๐Ÿคrights in ameriCUM ๐Ÿคค๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธif you get five โœ‹ back abortion ๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ’‹rights will be codified ๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€โš–๏ธ๐Ÿคคin law ๐Ÿ“ธ๐Ÿ‘ 
May 2022

Emoji Pasta

Politics

Daddy, are the Spammers gone?

twitchquotes: โ”ปโ”ณ| โ€ข.โ€ข) Daddy, are the Spammers Gone? โ”ปโ”ณ|(า‚`_ยด) ,๏ธปโ•ฆโ•คโ”€ า‰ NOPE,SON GET BACK IN YOUR BEDROOM
twitch chat
February 2016
Riot Games
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Text-to-Speech Playing