[Copypasta] Bowling simulator: E-Bowler

twitchquotes: Hello my name is Kenneth Jizbombski, president of Viral Games, Inc. Recently sales of our most popular Bowling simulator "E-Bowler" have plummeted. Please help my small company by going out and getting E-Bowler any way that you can. I want E-Bowler to spread infecting people with it's incredible gameplay!
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Viewbot #21701 reporting for duty

twitchquotes: MrDestructoid HEY MrDestructoid KRIPP MrDestructoid VIEWBOT #21701 MrDestructoid REPORTING MrDestructoid FOR MrDestructoid DUTY MrDestructoid
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

Viewbots

Patrick Star - I am back

──────────────────────── ─────────▄▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▄────── β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ ───────▄▀▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▄▀───── β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–€β–’β–„β–„β–„β–’β–„β–„β–„β–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€I─── β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–’β–’β”€β–€β”€β–’β”€β–€β”€β–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€AM── β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€BACK ────▄▀▒▒▒▀▄▄▄▀▒▒▒▒▀▀▄─── ──▄▀▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▀▄─ β”€β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–’β–’β–ˆβ”€ ─▀▄▀▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▀▄▀─ β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–’β–’β–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€ ──────▀▀─────────▀▀─────
August 2015
Kripp

"Only 200 Gems, are you kidding me?!"

twitchquotes: "Only 200 Gems, are you kidding me?!" screams Kripp at the struggling mobile game dev who's game he is being sponsored to play. "How am I supposed to hit rank 1 without a massive head-start over everyone else!? I have to be able to brag to my chat about being #1 in every game I play!" The developer, scared, gives in to his demands. Business as usual for the Kripp.
twitch chat
November 2018
Kripp

sellout

This guy's deck is average

twitchquotes: β˜‘ β€œThis guy's deck is average” β˜‘ β€œMy deck wins about half of the time against a deck like that” β˜‘ "He played precisely those two cards" β˜‘ β€œHe topdecked a mediocre card for a mediocre turn” β˜‘ "He had several cards" β˜‘ β€œThere were multiple options open to me” β˜‘ β€œI played that"
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

This Copypasta Is CRAZY!

Real hardcore gamers play at least 4 games at a time

twitchquotes: οΌ’ games at ο½”ο½ˆο½… same ο½”ο½‰ο½ο½…οΌŸ ο½†ο½‰ο½Œο½”ο½ˆο½™ ο½ƒο½ο½“ο½•ο½ο½ŒοΌŽ ο½’ο½…ο½ο½Œ ο½ˆο½ο½’ο½„ο½ƒο½ο½’ο½… gamers ο½ο½Œο½ο½™ at ο½Œο½…ο½ο½“ο½” οΌ” games ο½—ο½‰ο½”ο½ˆ ο½ο½Žο½… ο½ˆο½ο½Žο½„ tied ο½‚ο½…ο½ˆο½‰ο½Žο½„ ο½”ο½ˆο½…ο½‰ο½’ ο½‚ο½ο½ƒο½‹οΌŽ ο½“ο½…ο½’ο½‰ο½ο½•ο½“ο½Œο½™ ο½‹ο½’ο½‰ο½ο½οΌŒ if you ο½—ο½ο½Žο½” to keep your viewers you better step it ο½•ο½οΌŽ ο½“ο½‰ο½Žο½ƒο½…ο½’ο½…ο½Œο½™οΌŒ a ο½“ο½ο½ο½Ž to be ο½…ο½˜οΌο½‹ο½’ο½‰ο½ο½ο½Œο½…ο½”
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing