[Copypasta] Lonely Moby Dick

twitchquotes: So in Moby Dick why does Captain Ahab never consider that the whale is just lonely and looking for love? Clearly it's been through a lot from the scarring and probably wants to settle down in it's golden years. Personnally, if i were captain, i would have been a good human and take 2 and a half feet of whale cock to ease his pain
twitch chat
June 2020
I used to be a real ad
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Crab

⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣮⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣵⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣿⣯⡛⠋⠁⢻⡟⠈⠙⢛⣽⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⢾⣿⠟⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠻⣿⡷⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿ ⠛⠛⣷⡀⠀⠀⠈⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠁⠀⠀⢀⣾⠛⠛ ⡀⠀⠈⠻⣶⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⣶⠟⠁⠀⢀ ⣷⣄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⣾ ⠛⠛⠛⠶⠶⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠶⠶⠛⠛⠛ ⣆⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣰ ⣿⣿⡿⠶⠚⠉⠀⠀⢀⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⡀⠀⠀⠉⠓⠶⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡴⠋⠀⠀⣠⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣄⠀⠀⠙⢦⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣿ ⣿⣿⣷⣾⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
October 2019

Disappointed with Giant Enemy Crabgot

twitchquotes: I was INSANELY disappointed once I loaded into summoner's rift on my favourite champion, Urgot, to find that Giant Enemy Crabgot did NOT have a female resting on his left shoulder ingame. This is a HUGE deal as it was one of the main factors of which I purchased the skin. I sincerely ask that you recoup my losses or change the skin to have a female resting on his manly shoulder
twitch chat
January 2017

League of Legends

Positive streamers only

twitchquotes: Hi Mewnfare, it's Cliff, from Blizzard. Heard you were having some issues with matchmaking in our game. Our records show you aren't on our Streamer Prime servers, due to the notes 'Salt mine Overlord' and 'Hots Suggardaddy' Flagged on your account. I regret to inform you only positive streamers can play with a proper matchmaking today. Feel free to submit an appeal to our support team.
twitch chat
November 2020
mewnfare

I sexually Identify as the Bolshevik Revolution of 1917

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as the Bolshevik Revolution of 1917. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of seizing the means of production from the dirty bourgeoisie. People say to me that a person being a historical communist revolution is Impossible and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon instal hammers, sickles, and other assorted proletariat farming tools on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Comrade" and respect my right to seize the means of production and free the working class. If you can't accept me you're an oppressor and need to check your capitalist privileges. Thank you for being so understanding.
twitch chat
June 2017

I sexually Identify as

Or I will be forced to call the 0-3 Police

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparrian, this is Reginald. It has come to my attention that you went 0-3 in Hearthstone arena. This is completely unacceptable and detrimental to the image of Team Solo Mid. Remove any and all affiliation with TSM and "BayLife" or I will be forced to call the 0-3 Police.
twitch chat
March 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

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