[Copypasta] Todd Howard Fallout 76 announcement

twitchquotes: Hey, gamers. It's me, Todd Howard with an important announcement. Fallout 76 was all an early April Fools' joke. To help us release the REAL game, Fallout: New Vegas 2, all I need is your credit card number, the expiration month and year, and the three digits on the back.
twitch chat
November 2018
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Call of Duty is the most realistic video game with the most advanced engine

Meanwhile in Call of Duty, true gamers laugh about Battlefield's primitive physics engine. Arma was an attempt by a failing Czech developer to make Call of Duty 'more realistic'. However due to the fact that Call of Duty was already as realistic as a video game can possibly be, they panicked. They made a shameless rip-off and slapped 'military simulator' on the front. True gamers are smart enough to know this, hence why Arma averages 67 on Metacritic, whereas Call of Duty averages 98-100. Call of Duty players laugh down at players of every other game, knowing they are Call of Duty rip-offs. Call of Duty is the most realistic video game with the most advanced engine. The world's leading video game scientists have confirmed this, so it isn't as much 'thinking' as it is 'knowing'. And Call of Duty can't possibly RIP those games off. Call of Duty was the first video game, so there wasn't anything for it to rip off.
August 2021

Call of Duty

Everyone please STOP SPAMMING

twitchquotes: Everyone, please STOP SPAMMING, it is very INCONSIDERATE of the folks who are trying to have REAL CONVERSATIONS. Plz no copy pastarino Frappaccino-mochaccino-capuccino, macarino Eddie Pasterino pepperoncino kakaino poopieino peepeeino dickarino assarino skillswiperino salterino bad-luckerino Al Pacino with his dongerino in San Bernardino.
twitch chat
May 2014
Kripp

Hey, vsauce, Micheal here! Why is my peepee hard? Or is it?

Hey, vsauce, Micheal here! Why is my peepee hard? Or is it? Well, ya see, we need to start with the peepee itself. The hardening of the peepee is called an erection. Erection. The term itself shares a similarity with our own predecessors, Homo Erectus. That's Latin for Gay Straight. So, naturally, we can start to fill in the picture. Our predecessors, Gay Straights, also had hard peepees. Which brings us back to modern day erections. You see, an erection is a signal to tell you that you are gay, a leftover device from the era of Gay Straights. But what is "gay"? To quote Nelson Mandela, "To be gay is not to love others. It is to love yourself and to stay true in the face of many hardships and hard dicks." In Layman's terms, Nelson Mandela is trying to tell us to go fuck ourselves. This is vital to know because it puts into perspective the absolute size of gayness itself, divided into unique homogenous subgroups. Such a diverse range is exactly why the flag of LGBTQBBQ communities is a rainbow. But, you ask, how does this tie in to what gay Is? I'm getting there. Gay is a slang term for homosexual, which is to have sexual interest in someone of the same gender as yourself. To see more on the topic of gender, click the annotation on my face now for a playlist of videos specifically on the subject. So, to answer your question, your peepee is hard because you're gay. Hopefully today's little snippet was a good brain train for you. If you'd like to find other fun ways to test your mind mettle, click the annotation up here to go see some of my huge DONGs. And, as always, thanks for watching.
August 2021

monkaShh

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣤⣶⣶⣿⣶⣶⣤⣀⠄⣀⣤⣴⣶⣶⣶⣦⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢀⣤⣿⠡⢟⡿⠿⣛⣛⣛⠿⢿⡆⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣃⣸⣧⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣋⣵⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⡄⣩⣴⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣭⣉⣀⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢀⣿⡟⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢋⣭⣴⣶⣶⣶⣦⣮⡙⠟⢛⣭⣭⣶⣶⣶⣮⣭⣄⠄ ⣴⣸⣿⠑⣛⣿⠟⢩⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⡋⠉⣿⣿⡌⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⡋⠛⣿⣧ ⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣭⣝⡻⠿⣿⣿⣷⣧⣵⠿⢟⡑⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠶⠭⠶⠟⠃ ⣬⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣬⣙⣛⣒⠠⢤⣤⡔⢚⣛⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⣋⣱⣾⣿⣿⣿⣎⡙⢛⣋⣉⣉⣅⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢏⣭⡝⢿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣛⣩⣭⣭⣭⣛⣛⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⡏⣾⣿⡇⢸⣿⡿⠿⢛⣃⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⢾⣿⣯⣭⣍⣛⣛⣛⡻⠶⠶⣮⣭⢡⣿⣿⢇⣭⣵⣶⠾⠿⠋⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⢿⣦⣤⣭⣭⣭⣝⣛⡻⠿⠿⠿⠶⠶⢸⣿⣿⢠⣤⣤⣶⠾⠛⠄⠄ ⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣾⣿⡿⠰⠖⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣭⣕⠒⠲⣭⣭⣝⣛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⢛⣛⣭⠄⣿⡟⢣⣴⣾⠟⢂⣤⡀⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣮⣭⣭⣭⣍⣛⣛⣉⣭⣭⣭⣶⢸⣿⣿⣿⣯⣴⠞⣛⣭⣶⣷⠄
November 2021

Pepe

Pizza anytime

twitchquotes: ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ ᴘɪᴢᴢᴀᴀᴀᴀ. ᴘɪᴢᴢᴀ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴏʀɴɪɴɢ ᴘɪᴢᴢᴀ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴇᴠᴇɴɪɴɢ ᴘɪᴢᴢᴀ ᴀᴛ sᴜᴘᴘᴇʀᴛɪᴍᴇ. ᴡʜᴇɴ ᴘɪᴢᴢᴀs ᴏɴ ᴀ ʙᴀɢᴇʟ, ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴ ᴇᴀᴛ ᴘɪᴢᴢᴀ ᴀɴʏᴛɪᴍᴇ ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ
twitch chat
April 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing