[Copypasta] Todd Howard Fallout 76 announcement

twitchquotes: Hey, gamers. It's me, Todd Howard with an important announcement. Fallout 76 was all an early April Fools' joke. To help us release the REAL game, Fallout: New Vegas 2, all I need is your credit card number, the expiration month and year, and the three digits on the back.
twitch chat
November 2018
What happened to this ad? :(
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At least you have a life

twitchquotes: (β—•β€Ώβ—•βœΏ) Kripp, you may suck at Hearthstone but at least you have a girlfriend. I bet these people beating you have no life (β—•β€Ώβ—•βœΏ)
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

πŸ‘…HAPPY NEW YEARS SLUTS πŸ†

πŸ‘―hey SlutS! πŸ‘―πŸ’… Now that we got our yearly 🎁 FUCK πŸ‘ŠπŸΌfrom good ole Saint DICK πŸŽ…πŸΎ it’s FINALLY New Years Eve!!!πŸ—“πŸΎπŸ‘… 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣0️⃣ was a LONGG πŸ†πŸ† and HARD πŸ˜‰βœŠπŸ»πŸ˜« year.... we laughedπŸ˜‚πŸ˜†πŸ‘ŒπŸΌ We cried πŸ˜’πŸ˜–πŸ‘Ž We coughed πŸ’¦πŸ€’πŸ€§ we fucked GOODπŸ‘πŸ» dickπŸ† and 😡😡BAD πŸ˜” dick, 😫 BUTT πŸ‘ now let’s πŸ‘πŸ‘Celebrate πŸ™ŒπŸŽ‰ and watch that πŸ’¦πŸ†BIG πŸ‘… BALL πŸ˜ŽπŸ‘ŒπŸΌ Drop πŸ‘„πŸ‘„ on us! πŸ’ƒπŸ’ƒ So spread πŸ‘πŸ½ those πŸ‘πŸ½ legs πŸ‘πŸ½ and count down ⬇️ from πŸ”Ÿ until your man πŸ’ͺ🏾 pops πŸŽ‰ his CORK 🍾🍾 into that thirsty πŸ‘…thirsty πŸ‘… hole! πŸ₯°πŸ₯° Send this to 2️⃣1️⃣ COCK-BEGGING βœŠπŸ»πŸ† WHORES to get BUTTFUCKED πŸ‘πŸ˜± for the next 3️⃣6️⃣5️⃣ days 😍😍😍
August 2021

Emoji Pasta

New Years

Holiday Emoji

NSFW

Holiday

What if TF2 injuries were more realistic?

Just imagine: You are playing 2fort as RED team and pick heavy, you get out of spawn when suddenly a Pyro with the Homewrecker hits you square on the head. Your Heavy falls down and makes a weird snoring sound and has a nasty gash in his head with clear fluid running out of his ears. Then for like 30 minutes the screen goes black and you hear Heavy being transported into an ambulance. After the 30 mins Heavy opens his eyes a little. It looks like hes in the ICU and is currently getting artificially ventilated. Then the screen goes black again for 3 days until Heavy opens his eyes a little to see a woman, presumably heavys wife, crying beside his bed. She says something but it seems like Heavy doesnt understand anything she is saying, only thing you clearly make out is "permanent brain damage" and how sorry she is for never talking you out of your Mercenary profession. Then the screen goes black for another 5 months with some short times of conciousness inbetween until you see the same woman with 2 kids talking to your doctor in the ICU. All you can make out is that they decided to end your suffering and pull the plug. The last thing you see is heavys eyes closing, until you suddenly respawn in RED Spawn.
January 2021

Bear King Burry vs TSLA

Bear King Michael Burry in the ring, slappin TSLA with a metal chair. His glass eye open wide with rage as he batters TSLA relentlessly. "The valuation..." crunch "makes...." crunch "NO.... " crunch "SENSE!" he roars with maniacal autistic glee. TSLA struggles for the edge of the ring, but coughs blood as each hit lands, and eventually stops moving. Bear King Burry drops the chair. Bear King Burry turns to the crowd "Was this your champion!? Was TSLA supposed to be your chosen one!?" A child in the crowd turns his face into his mother's side and cries. On the side of the ring WSB can barely move. TSLA was supposed to tag them in, but couldn't make it to the side in time. "Get up TSLA" WSB whimpers hopelessly, a single tear rolling down their cheek. "Get up..." Bear King Burry turns to WSB "Now it is your portfolio's turn. Get in here you little bitch." "Excuse me." Someone replies from behind BKB. "I believe I can give you the fight you want." A robed figure is administering smelling salts to TSLA. The figure puts TSLA on its shoulder and carries TSLA gently out of the ring. "And just who the fuck do you think you are?" BKB rumbles ominously. BKB's fingers squeeze so tightly on the chair that metal bends. "Who am I?" the robed figure inquires. The robed figure stands straight and stretches to their full height. They must be at least 7' tall. The crowd stops crying and watches in stunned silence. "Who am I?" The figure repeats menacingly. The figure turns around to face BKB, ripping off his robe. A gleaming light fills the stadium. Before us stands a Golden deity, rippling with muscle. If there is an ounce of body fat it is currently in hiding, only to make way for seemingly endless coiled golden musculature. The figure looks directly into Bear King Burry's eyes. "I'm Goldman Sachs, and i'm here to kill you."
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Please dont talk about melee in an ultimate chat 😑

twitchquotes: honestly melee is dead, it has been since smash 4. Please dont talk about melee in a smash ultimate chat. 😑
twitch chat
April 2019

Super Smash Bros

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