[Copypasta] Why did I marry this angry bald internet man?

twitchquotes: It’s 11 p.m. and i've finally gotten comfortable in bed. It's been a long day and finally being able to get some rest is such a luxury. But my peace is soon broken as my husband shouts from the other room "OH COME ON! That was such BULLSHIT! Fucking highrolled AGAIN." Why did i do this to myself. Why did I marry this angry bald internet man? I haven't slept properly in months for his constant yelling throughout the night. God help me.
twitch chat
September 2020
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

I've been making fake sub names for Kripp

twitchquotes: Hey, my name is Carlton Pasterino. I have something to confess. For the last 3 years I've been making fake sub names for Kripp. He pays me pennies and dimes to come up with 50 new names a day. From Thundercuck to MrRabbit69, I've made over 80% of his subs up for him. I'm tired of working like a child laborer. I'm ready to go back to college and make something of myself. I'm here to let the world know.
twitch chat
December 2016
Kripp

Classic

Professional Penguin Wrestling Champion

twitchquotes: hello. i am 18 years old and i am a profesonal penguin wrestling champion. i have won all matches with penguins but now i need money to go to the north pole so i can wrestle with the penguin king so please donate to me. please dont copy and paste my life story
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Teddy Roosevelt messages Kripp

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, This is Teddy Roosevelt calling! I am concerned that you have formed a monopoly on the hearthstone section of twitch dot telly. You must renounce this darkness immediately or I will SMITE YOU like I did Andre Carnegie and Nelson Rockemsockem. You must give up your monopolistic ways or face the mighty wrath of the White House and the US Judicial system. Much love to Rania and the baby. Regards, yo boi TD
twitch chat
June 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

12-1 Cheerleaders

twitchquotes: ❁(β—• β€Ώ β—•)❁ This is the 12-1 Cheerleaders, Go Kripp Go! ❁(β—• β€Ώ β—•)❁
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

When soup, my spoon automatically go to bowl

twitchquotes: ο½—ο½ˆο½…ο½Ž ο½“ο½ο½•ο½οΌŒ my ο½“ο½ο½ο½ο½Ž ο½ο½•ο½”ο½ο½ο½ο½”ο½‰ο½ƒο½ο½Œο½Œο½™ go to ο½”ο½ˆο½… bottom of ο½”ο½ˆο½… ο½‚ο½ο½—ο½ŒοΌŽ i taste ο½”ο½ˆο½… more ο½†ο½Œο½ο½–ο½ο½•ο½’ ο½ο½Žο½„ ο½†ο½…ο½…ο½Œ ο½ˆο½ο½–ο½‰ο½Žο½‡ ο½“ο½…ο½˜ ο½—ο½‰ο½”ο½ˆ ο½”ο½ˆο½… ο½“ο½ο½‰ο½ƒο½…οΌŽ all ο½‚ο½…ο½ƒο½ο½ο½‰ο½Žο½‡ fuck you
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing