[Copypasta] Give me a second guys, Dex says

twitchquotes: "Give me a second, guys," Dex says. "Gotta hit up the mailman" He turns down the volume on his bork, and immediately gives Kripp a swift kick down the stairs. As Kripp yelps loudly in pain, Dex overturns the nearest chair, yelling "Fuck this delivery!" as loudly as he can. Fey tries to calm him down, but Dex swiftly bodyslams her onto a glass coffee table. After taking a few deep breaths, Dex wipes the blood off of his snout, sits back down at his ball, and resumes being a good doggy
twitch chat
January 2019
Kripp
What happened to this ad? :(
More Kripp Copypastas

Give the Kitty 200 kissy wissy's on his little tum tum

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, this is Kenneth J. Nipplemeyer IV, sole heir to the Nipplemeyer fortune. I am willing to give you the entirety of my family's $26 Billion Fortune if you give the Kitty 200 kissy wissy's on his little tum tum on stream. Must be done enthusiastically and at 60fps or no deal. Sincerely. Kenneth aka "the Nippster"
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

I'm Tanner jr. btw!

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, I just turned 5 years old! My dad says I'm pretty good at this game at that I should watch your stream to learn how not to play bad. He says he stole your high school girlfriend. Oh yeah, I'm Tanner Jr. btw! Nice to meet you!
twitch chat
May 2019
Kripp

Tanner from High School

EU>NA

twitchquotes: I *** on the Flag of the United States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands, the Fattys, Guys who have no idea of anything and the most Hated Country EU > NA 4 ever
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Kripp needs to find a Romanian woman

twitchquotes: KRIPP! This is Papparian, your father! What is this I hear about marrying a Greek woman and making mini kripps with her??!! You need to find yourself a real full bodied Romanian woman, boy. One that can hand squeeze OJ and carry on our bloodline.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Doggies can be vegan too

twitchquotes: I am a dog being raised by a very loving family. Or at least I was, until a balding romanian gypsy kidnapped me from my home. Now he doesn't let me go outside and doesn't feed me. Every time I try to tell him I am hungry he puts green leaves in my bowl and says doggies can be vegan too if they try hard enough. I believe this man is mentally disabled. Please send help. OhMyDog
twitch chat
June 2016
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing