[Copypasta] Think about your actions

twitchquotes: I have noticed that, although this subreddit has 179,776 readers, I am not receiving 179,776 upvotes on my posts. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to click 'upvote'. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to upvote my most recent posts. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
twitch chat
September 2018

Classic

What happened to this ad? :(
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My son won't stop using "TwitchSpeak?

My son (14) watches a lot of video game streamers on Twitch.tv. I personally don't find them entertaining but I can understand why some people (like my son) do. Over the past month he's starting using terms like "pog", "jabaited", and "Kappa" which I guess are terms that are used in the scope of Twitch. I don't have an issue with my son using these terms but it's gotten to the point where every sentence is Twitchspeak. We were having dinner and my daughter (age 12) was talking about how she got accepted for a summer program with the local animal shelter, and my son said "Pog you, easy clap". I told him that it was getting out of hand and that he would have to communicate normally to his parents and family. To that he said "Weird champ, feels weird man, normies omega LOL." Until he learns to communicate like a normal human being I've blacklisted Twitch from the internet for the time being. He's hysterical now but I told him that I would unblacklist it if he stopped using twitchspeak, but he's refusing to stop so for now it's banned. AITA?
May 2019

Classic

Am I The Asshole?

Oops I dropped my CONGA LINE

twitchquotes: Oops I dropped my CONGA LINE πŸƒπŸšΆ πŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆ CONGA LINE πŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆ πŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆ CONGA LINE πŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆ πŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆ CONGA LINE πŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆ πŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆ CONGA LINE πŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆπŸ’ƒπŸƒπŸšΆ
twitch chat
October 2015

Classic

I saw JPOW at the grocery store

I saw JPOW at the grocery store. I was buying a dozen eggs last night and the store was kind of slow since it was after dark. Some old boomer was in front of me and chatting away with the woman at the cash register. Everyone had masks on, but as soon as he spoke I recognized the voice. He was telling the lady how inflation is a good thing. She said how come inflation keeps going up but minimum wage never rises? He ignored her and pulls out a large sheet of $1 bills. He asks if she had scissors but she said no. He looked back at me and saw the eggs and said "You workout huh? Its good to stay healthy. I used to workout by lifting bales of hay after school in 1952. Eggs are a good source of energy, mind if I take one? " I shrugged and told him.go ahead. He opened my pack of eggs, takes one out, lowers his mask, just throws the whole thing in his mouth shell and all, puts his mask back up, and begins chewing loudly. As he's chewing he's crookedly folding and ripping a sheet of dollar bills handing them to the lady individually. While he's chewing he tells me it's a great time to buy bonds. I tell him I'm good. The store was short on change so he just pays the full dollar amount. He hands me a crooked bill that is almost ripped in half and says "thanks pal, in the future that single egg will be worth a dollar so we will call it even" Im heading to my car after and I see him and another boomer arguing. There was JPOW and he's arguing with a man built like a gnome wearing a poorly fit collared shirt. The little man spoke and I instantly knew it was Cramer. Cramer wanted JPOW to hurry up and stop hogging the best parking spot. JPOW tells Cramer that hes got his mask on inside out and upside down. They both start talking about inflation and then look deep into each other's eyes and start making out with their masks on. It was a pretty weird.
February 2021

WallStreetBets

Classic

this streamer is look very nerd

twitchquotes: this streamer is look very nerd :\
twitch chat
August 2019

Classic

A single Dongerbill can save a life

twitchquotes: Hello, I'm Sarah McLanchdong. Every day millions of poor, helpless dongers go unraised everyday. Dongers that are abused and negated, like this poor fellow ΰΌΌ β–€ΜΏ ΜΏ Ω„ΝŸΰΊˆ ΰΌ½. For just one Dongerbill [Μ²$Μ²(Μ² Ν‘Β° ΝœΚ– Ν‘Β°Μ²)Μ²$Μ²] a day we can help save these forgotten dongers (β—‰_☒) ΰΌΌ ͝°ʖಠ ΰΌ½ ( Ν‘Β°Ω„Νœ ΒΊ) from a life time of being lowered. Your there only hope, because just a minute of your time and a single Dongerbill [Μ²$Μ²(Μ² Ν‘Β° ΝœΚ– Ν‘Β°Μ²)Μ²$Μ²] can save a life.
twitch chat
November 2014

Classic

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