twitchquotes:
π’ SLOW AND STEADY π’ WINS THE RACE π’ MODS CAN'T BAN ME π’ AT THIS PACE π’
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I used to be a real ad
More Classic Copypastas
Natalie Portman is the reason I work out
Natalie Portman is the reason I work out. I have this fantasy where we start talking at the Vanity Fair Oscars party bar. We exchange a few pleasantries. She asks what I do. I say I loved her in New Girl. She laughs. I get my drink.
"Well, see ya," I say and walk away. I've got her attention now. How many guys voluntarily leave a conversation with Natalie Portman? She touches her neck as she watches me leave.
Later, as the night's dragged on and the coterie of gorgeous narcissists grows increasingly loose, she finds me on the balcony, my bowtie undone, smoking a cigarette.
"Got a spare?" she asks.
"What's in it for me?" I say as I hand her one of my little white ladies. She smiles.
"Conversation with me, duh."
I laugh.
"What's so funny?" she protests.
"Nothing, nothing... It's just... don't you grow tired of the egos?"
"You get used to it," she says, lighting her cigarette and handing me back the lighter.
"What would you do if you weren't an actress?" I ask.
"Teaching, I think."
"And if I was your student, what would I be learning?"
"Discipline," she says quickly, looking up into my eyes, before changing the subject. "Where are you from?"
"Bermuda," I say.
"Oh wow. That's lovely."
"It's ok," I admit. "Not everything is to my liking."
"What could possibly be not to your liking in Bermuda?" she inquires.
"I don't like sand," I tell her. "It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere."
Classic
I am coming back from my 10 minute ban
twitchquotes:
I am coming back from my 10 minute ban, and I want to say that I think it was bullshit. Yes, I wrote a funny paragraph that turned into copypasta, which happened to bring a laugh or a smile to a few people. If you mods wanted that to stop, you could have just said so, there is so much copypasta going on in this chat that I could have never thought that deserved a 10 minute ban. Reggie is probably a mod in here and he is the one that banned me. Anyway, I'm glad to be back
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Classic
MODS
Secret Puerto Rican lover
twitchquotes:
Hola, Kripp, this is Antonio, Rania's secret Puerto Rican lover. I mistakenly left a package of my Magnum XXL Heavy-Duty Condoms at your place last night while you were complaining about a children's card game. I was hoping I could swing by tonight and pick them up. I'll just go in through the backdoor just like how I do with Rania, the dirty girl! Thanks, and good luck with your funny little computer game!
twitch chat
Kripp
Classic
Now playing Who Asked (Feat: Nobody)
twitchquotes:
now α΄Κα΄ΚΙͺΙ΄Ι’: Who asked (Feat: Nobody) ββββββββββββͺββββββ βββ βββ βΊβΊ πΈ:π·πΎ / πΉ:π»πΌβ ββββ π
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Classic
Who Asked?
FitnessGram Pacer Test
The FitnessGramβ’ Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20 meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly, but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. [beep] A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. [ding] Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start.