Search TwitchQuotes
514 copypastas found. 0 streams found. 0 copypasta tags found.
I used to be a real ad
514 copypastas found.

I sexually Identify as a WEEB

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as a WEEB. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of AYAYA. People say to me that a person being a WEEB is Impossible and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm cute. From now on I want you guys to call me "AYAYA-CHAN" and respect my right to be cute. If you can't accept me you're a racist and need to check your privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
twitch chat
May 2019

Weebs

That's some bad shit right there

twitchquotes: do NOT sign me the FUCK up ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘€ bad shit baฬทฬถ ิ sHit ๐Ÿ‘Ž thats โŒ some bad ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘Žshit right ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘Ž th ๐Ÿ‘Ž ere ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘Ž right โŒ there โŒ โŒ if i do ฦฝaาฏ so my sel๏ฝ†๐Ÿšซ i say so ๐Ÿšซ thats not what im talking about right there right there (chorus: สณแถฆแตสฐแต— แต—สฐแต‰สณแต‰) mMMMMแŽทะœ ๐Ÿšซ ๐Ÿ‘Ž ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘ŽะO0ะžเฌ ๏ผฏOO๏ผฏOะžเฌ เฌ Ooooแต’แต’แต’แต’แต’แต’แต’แต’แต’ ๐Ÿ‘Ž ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘Ž ๐Ÿ‘Ž ๐Ÿšซ ๐Ÿ‘Ž ๐Ÿ‘€ ๐Ÿ‘€ ๐Ÿ‘€ ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘ŽBad shit
twitch chat
April 2016

Here ๐Ÿ’ฆ CUMS ๐Ÿ’ฆ SANTA (Christmas Emoji Pasta)

Here ๐Ÿ’ฆCUMS๐Ÿ’ฆ ๐ŸŽ…๐ŸฝSanta Claus,๐ŸŽ…๐Ÿฝ here ๐Ÿ’ฆCUMS๐Ÿ’ฆ ๐ŸŽ…๐ŸฝSanta Claus,๐ŸŽ…๐Ÿฝ right down ๐Ÿ‘ฉ๐Ÿฝ๐Ÿ‘ธ๐Ÿฝslutty girl lane!๐Ÿ‘ฉ๐Ÿฝ๐Ÿ‘ธ๐Ÿฝ โŒ๐ŸšซโŒ๐ŸšซSTOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!โŒ๐ŸšซโŒ๐Ÿšซ Is your ๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿปdaddy๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿป not giving you enough ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆcummies?!๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ Hold up,๐Ÿ™…๐Ÿฝ๐Ÿ™…๐Ÿฝ๐Ÿ™…๐Ÿฝ ho! It's ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆcummy๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ โ„๏ธ๐Ÿ’ฆโ„๏ธSEASON!โ„๏ธ๐Ÿ’ฆโ„๏ธ Pushโœ‹๐Ÿฝโœ‹๐Ÿฝ that ๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿปdaddy๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿป to the โฉโฉsideโฉโฉ and let a ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐ŸฝNEW๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿฝ father in ๐ŸกYOUR CHIMNEY!! ๐Ÿก ๐ŸŽ…๐Ÿฝ๐ŸŽ…๐Ÿฝ๐ŸŽ…๐ŸฝFather CHRISTMAS,๐ŸŽ…๐Ÿฝ๐ŸŽ…๐Ÿฝ๐ŸŽ…๐Ÿฝ the ๐Ÿ‘‘๐Ÿ‘‘KING๐Ÿ‘‘๐Ÿ‘‘ of ๐Ÿ’ฆcummies!๐Ÿ’ฆ That's right,๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿผ he's been making ๐Ÿ‘ง๐Ÿฝlittle๐Ÿ‘ง๐Ÿฝ ๐Ÿ‘ง๐Ÿฝgirls๐Ÿ‘ง๐Ÿฝ squishy for 6๏ธโƒฃ CENTURIES. Don't โŽโŽ mind the old saying; he ONLY makes the ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ˜ˆNAUGHTIEST๐Ÿ˜ˆ๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ’ฆgirls โ˜๏ธsquishyโ˜๏ธ! So send this to all the ๐Ÿ˜ผnastiest๐Ÿ˜ผ ๐Ÿ‘ง๐Ÿฝgirls๐Ÿ‘ง๐Ÿฝ you know and shareโ—๏ธThoseโ—๏ธCummiesโ—๏ธGet 0๏ธโƒฃ back and you're a basic ๐ŸŒ‘๐ŸŒ‘coal-slinging bitch.๐ŸŒ‘๐ŸŒ‘ Get 5๏ธโƒฃ back and you get ๐Ÿ‘…eaten๐Ÿ‘… like ๐Ÿชcookies๐Ÿชand ๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ’ฆslurped๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ‘… like ๐Ÿผmilk!๐Ÿผ Get 1๏ธโƒฃ0๏ธโƒฃ back and ๐ŸŽ…๐ŸฝSanta's๐ŸŽ…๐Ÿฝ big ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ†COCK๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ† will growโซโซ 3๏ธโƒฃ sizes inside of you!๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ˜ฉ Get 1๏ธโƒฃ5๏ธโƒฃ back and you become Mrs. Claus, and get ๐Ÿ‘๐ŸŒ๐Ÿ†yummy ๐Ÿ’๐Ÿญ๐Ÿผnummy ๐Ÿผ๐Ÿ’ฆโ˜๏ธsquishy๐Ÿผ๐Ÿ’ฆโ˜๏ธ ๐Ÿ’ง๐Ÿ’งcummies๐Ÿ’ง๐Ÿ’ง until next โฉ๐ŸŒจโ˜ƒChristmas!๐ŸŒจโ˜ƒ
December 2021

Emoji Pasta

Christmas

Holiday Emoji

Holiday

A cat's eye view is the best advantage

twitchquotes: "wtf are you doing Micheal" says Lisha as she walks into the room and sees QT on top of the cat stand. He looks at her and says "A cat's eye view is the best advantage." deIlluminati
twitch chat
July 2015
imaqtpie

I sexually Identify as an Elon Musk

I sexually Identify as an Elon Musk. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of implanting wires in monkey brains and being the supreme leader of Mars. People say to me that a person being a multi-billionaire CEO is impossible and Iโ€™m a fucking Twittard but I donโ€™t care, Iโ€™m the richest man on Earth. Iโ€™m having a plastic surgeon install a Tesla HUD, StarLink terminal and a crypto mining rig on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me โ€œTechnoking of Teslaโ€ and respect my right to manipulate dogecoin prices. If you canโ€™t accept me youโ€™re a muskophobe and need to check your unionized worker privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
April 2022

I sexually Identify as

Hello Kripp, Cattarian here

twitchquotes: CoolCat Hello Kripp, Cattarian here. Since I'm dead, my new family bought me sunglasses and propped me up like in that movie Weekend At Bernie's. How you doing in Canadaland? Playing Grindstone? Been lucky? Not dead like me? Say hello to Rania from me. CoolCat
twitch chat
July 2015
Kripp

I sexually Identify as the Bolshevik Revolution of 1917

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as the Bolshevik Revolution of 1917. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of seizing the means of production from the dirty bourgeoisie. People say to me that a person being a historical communist revolution is Impossible and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon instal hammers, sickles, and other assorted proletariat farming tools on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Comrade" and respect my right to seize the means of production and free the working class. If you can't accept me you're an oppressor and need to check your capitalist privileges. Thank you for being so understanding.
twitch chat
June 2017

I sexually Identify as

In japan we we say ไน‡ไน‚ใ„’ๅฐบๅ‚ ใ„’ๅ„ไธจๅŒšๅŒš

twitchquotes: In japan we don't say 'I love you' we say ไน‡ไน‚ใ„’ๅฐบๅ‚ ใ„’ๅ„ไธจๅŒšๅŒš which doesn't mean anything it just spells out 'Extra Thicc' in japanese symbols.
twitch chat
July 2017

AYAYA pyramid

twitchquotes: ______ AYAYA only real Ayaa can build the perfect pyramid AYAYA AYAYA . Try like me !Try like me ! Try like me !! AYAYA AYAYA AYAYA And my pyramid still higher!!!! AYAYA AYAYA AYAYA AYAYA yes I am very good look!! AYAYA AYAYA AYAYA AYAYA AYAYA one more u say ? AYAYA AYAYA AYAYA AYAYA AYAYA AYAYA for fun ok !!
twitch chat
May 2019

Weebs

If, according to Kanye West

If, according to Kanye West, one good girl is worth a thousand bitches, and if, according to Lil Wayne, bitches come a dime a dozen, does that mean one good girl is worth $8.33? Well, $8.35 in Canada. In Thailand, $8.33 is about 275 Baht. 275 Baht will get you a skanky one in a Thai brothel. If you want a really good hooker, it'll cost you at least 2000 Baht, or about $61.00. So in Thailand a good woman is worth $61.00 or $732 a dozen. Yes. However to further this, according to 2Pac Mo' Money= Mo' Bitches If you divide out Mo', you will see that money=bitches Therefore, 1000 moneys= one good girl. To extrapolate further, diving with respect to "money" yields 1 money = $0.00833 This changes everything, because money isn't worth hardly anything. True. A linear relationship between money and bitches means the equation relating money to them is in the form of y=ax+b, where x is money and y is bitches. Consulting the Lil Wayne theorem, if 12 bitches are worth $0.10, then one is $0.0083. Therefore we know that the equation 1=a(.0083)+b must hold true and so must 12=a(.1)+b. To find the equation relating money to bitches must have "a" and "b" values which satisfy the two previous equations. Since "Mo'" implies a positive linear relation, we know "a" must be positive. I have done the math for you and found that a=119.96 and b=.0043. So, (Bitches)=119.96(Money) + .0043. To find the number of good girls you get from an amount of money, simply divide the number of bitches by 1000 (because of the Kanye West Theorem). No but biggie said mo' money= mo' problems so money=problems and since mo' money mo' bitches, we can see that bitches=problems Well one must first consult the "50 Cent Law": "Mo' Money, Mo' Problems". Here we see that the amount of money is proportionate to the number of problems. Then one must factor one of the basic rules of the "The Carter Theorem" : "I got 99 problem but a bitch ain't one". Here we see that without a "bitch" the average person will have exactly 99 problems. Therefore the formula must be applied: (current amount of money) (8.33) / ln[(Problems100-1 ) (current amount of money)]bitches = worth of bitch Unfortunately this formula only tells us the value "a bitch" which as we know is only worth one monies Therefore you must apply [(worth of said prostitute) (problems) * (money-8.33)] + 1 / 1000 = The value of a good girl. Hope this helps. Yeah. No. That's not how math works. 2pac was merely stating that the derivative of Money in terms of Bitches is strictly positive. More-over, he skipped a lot of steps in his proof and never formally published the full version. I bet you believed Fermat's margins really were too small as well, right? Imperial bitches is actually a unit of weight. An imperial one is ~111.1111111112 pounds (Also known as a feminist) Theres one fundamental law of math that Lil'Wayne forgot to include in his calculations. We have to follow the law of "bitches ain't shit" theorized by doctor dre himself. With that principal included we can work out that if bitches aint shit, and a good girl is worth 1,000 bitches, a good girl is still not worth shit. You're forgetting that Jay-Z published his paper on the "Money Ain't A Thang" theory. Therefore if bitches aren't worth shit then bitches aren't money and so therefore they ARE, in fact, a "Thang". Is that the transitive property of bitches? Is it possible that for every bitch, there is an equal and opposite good girl? That doesn't make sense though because kanye said a good girl is worth one thousand bitches. The economics don't make sense. Newton or kanye is wrong. They cannot both apply their laws to bitches I think the important part here is, are we assuming that there is 1 good girl for every 1000 bitches. This is a very scary thought. 1/1000 females is a good girl and the other 999 are bitches. To me this would make my $8.33 a very good investment. I paid at least $3000 for my wife's wedding ring. Could I have bought 360 good girls in stead of 1 good girl? B/c I can't help but feel like I have overpaid for my good girl according to the genius of Kanye West and Little Weezy F. Baby. Don't get me wrong, I love my good girl wife, but I feel duped knowing she may have only been worth 8 bucks instead of 3000 It actually depends on they type of women. If it is a bakers daughter it is less since the sample size is actually larger I.E. a bakers dozen (13) so: (.10/13)x1000=$7.69 ...0r $9.69 Canadian (not counting the maple syrup) How much candy you can buy for $8.33? We can conclude that 1 bitch is worth approximately 0.83c, but since bitches are of negative value it's actually -0.83c. This means that in order to get the correct positive value of a good girl there needs to be an exponential factor involved here. In order to evaluate the amount of good girls needed to offset the bitches you use the simple formula -0.0083B2 = G. This intuitively makes sense when you think about how the more bitches you have around you the exponentially higher value even a single good girl has. So when B=1000 we get: G = -0.0083(1000)2 = $68.89 Interestingly enough, if the entire female population of the US, let's say 150 million for simplicity, were bitches, the worth of one good girl would then be $1,550,025,000,000 which is just over the total USD currently in circulation.
March 2022

I sexually identify as a centipede

twitchquotes: I sexually identify as a centipede. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of dropping dank memes on cucks everywhere. People say to me that a person being a centipede is Impossible and Iโ€™m *** retarded but I donโ€™t care, Iโ€™m beautiful. Iโ€™m having a plastic surgeon install 100 legs and two hollow fangs on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me โ€œNimble Navigatorโ€ and respect my right to meme everywhere and trigger endlessly.
twitch chat
November 2016

2016 US Election

I sexually Identify as

Catten Eatarrian

twitchquotes: "This pasta is delicious, Rania," says Kripp as he receives his vegan foodie. Rania replies, "That's not pasta. It's cat." As the Kripp vomits in horror, Trump removes the Rania mask. "It seems you've catten Eatarrian."
twitch chat
June 2015
Kripp

Forgive English, I am Russia

forgive english, i am Russia. i come to study clothing and fashion at American university. i am here little time and i am very hard stress. i am gay also and this very difficult for me, i am very religion person. i never act to be gay with other men before. but after i am in america 6 weeks i am my friend together he is gay also. He was show me American fashion and then we are kiss. We sex together. I never before now am tell my mother about gay because i am very shame. As i fock this American boy it is very good to me but also i am feel so guilty. I feel extreme guilty as I begin orgasm. I feel so guilty that I pick up my telephone and call Mother in Russia. I awaken her. It too late for stopping so I am cumming sex. I am very upset and guilty and crying, so I yell her, "I AM CUM FROM SEX" (in Russia). She say what? I say "I AM CUM FROM SEX" and she say you boy, do not marry American girl, and I say "NO I AM CUM FROM SEX WITH MAN, I AM IN ASS, I CUM IN ASS" and my mother very angry me. She not get scared though. I hang up phone and am very embarrass. My friend also he is very embarrass. I am guilt and feel very stupid. I wonder, why do I gay with man? But I continue because when it spurt it feel very good in American ass.
July 2014

KappaPride

Classic

It seems you've tarried Mrump

twitchquotes: Do you take Rania to be your lawfully wedded wife?" asks the priest. Kripp smiles as he slips the ring on her finger. "Yes I do," he says, squinting in the glare of a foggy day. The priest says, "You may kiss the bride." as the crowd cheers. Kripp lifts Rania's veil and recoils in horror. Trump smirks, "It seems you've tarried Mrump."
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

Can a nigga borrow a fry?

He says it every morning. He calls me nigga, he calls the other kids nigga, he calls himself nigga. All the time. Nigga this, nigga that, nigga PLEASE. Bitch nigga. Nigga have you lost your mind? Nigga check that ho. Nigga, you bullshittin. Break yourself, nigga. He says it so much I don't even notice it anymore. Last week in lunch Riley says to a classmate, "Can a nigga borrow a French fry?" My first thought wasn't "Oh my God he said the word, t-the n-word!" It was "How is a nigga gonna borrow a fry?, nigga, is you gonna give it back?"
January 2021

Hey Kripp-kun. It's me Samantha-chan!

twitchquotes: H-hey Kripp-kun. It's me Samantha-chan! I know you don't know me that well, I sit in the column closest to the door and in the back row. Oh yeah, duh... LoL, we have Chemistry together with Ms. Raphatello. Ughh, she's such a b****! Anyways I'm being such a baka (LoL that's Japanese for idiot!). Oh, do you like Anime too? I'm sure if you gave it a chance you would too if you don't already watch it ~_~. I always look at you in Chemistry and you never seem to notice me... BAHHH WHAT AM I DOING?!?! GOMENASAI Artour-kun (gomenasai means sorry in Japanese ^.^). Just wanted to say hello and I really love your stream! Good luck Kripp-kun!
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Weebs

Classic

I screamed "dead body reported" at my aunts funeral

Me (M 9) screamed "dead body reported" at my aunts funeral. My mom said that my aunt died and that we are going to her funeral the next morning. As soon as she left the room crying I busted put laughing because it reminded me of among us a popular video game. So as we were riding in the car I was thinking about saying "dead body reported" at the funeral. When we finnaly arived I screamed "dead body reported" everyone was looking me like if some sort of a weirdo. Then I remembered that my grandfather's sister fell in the vents and died when she was 2 years old. So I said grandpa's sister sus she vented. My grandfather started crying and everyone was screaming at me instead of laughing. My mom took my x box and said that I am going to therapist tomorow. Idk my mom is acting kinda sus ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚
February 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Ben Shapiro sings Rick Roll

Lets say, hypothetically, that we were not strangers to love, and lets say, you knew the rules and so did i. And if you thought of a full commitment, you wouldnt get this from any other guy, right? Then hypothetically speaking, i just want to tell you how im feeling. Now lets say i gotta make you understand. Now that we've established that im never gonna give you up or let you down. Am i not correct? You would never run around, and desert you. And i, as a balcony, think that i wouldnt make you cry, so i must be the one to never tell a lie, and hurt you This would mean that, we've known eachother for so long, and logically, your hearts been aching but, youre too shy to say it. which would proceed with both of us knowing whats been going on. Which didnt make sense, we know the game, in a way that we're gonna play it. Yet, if you ask me how im feeling, seeing as you shouldnt say that youre too blind to see
December 2020

Ben Shapiro

Response to "who asked?"

I don't care if you "didn't ask". The world does not revolve around you and I can say whatever the fuck I want, and I could not care less if you didn't ask so shut the fuck up. This is why you are lonely and everyone leaves you.
August 2021

Who Asked?

I saw JPOW at the grocery store

I saw JPOW at the grocery store. I was buying a dozen eggs last night and the store was kind of slow since it was after dark. Some old boomer was in front of me and chatting away with the woman at the cash register. Everyone had masks on, but as soon as he spoke I recognized the voice. He was telling the lady how inflation is a good thing. She said how come inflation keeps going up but minimum wage never rises? He ignored her and pulls out a large sheet of $1 bills. He asks if she had scissors but she said no. He looked back at me and saw the eggs and said "You workout huh? Its good to stay healthy. I used to workout by lifting bales of hay after school in 1952. Eggs are a good source of energy, mind if I take one? " I shrugged and told him.go ahead. He opened my pack of eggs, takes one out, lowers his mask, just throws the whole thing in his mouth shell and all, puts his mask back up, and begins chewing loudly. As he's chewing he's crookedly folding and ripping a sheet of dollar bills handing them to the lady individually. While he's chewing he tells me it's a great time to buy bonds. I tell him I'm good. The store was short on change so he just pays the full dollar amount. He hands me a crooked bill that is almost ripped in half and says "thanks pal, in the future that single egg will be worth a dollar so we will call it even" Im heading to my car after and I see him and another boomer arguing. There was JPOW and he's arguing with a man built like a gnome wearing a poorly fit collared shirt. The little man spoke and I instantly knew it was Cramer. Cramer wanted JPOW to hurry up and stop hogging the best parking spot. JPOW tells Cramer that hes got his mask on inside out and upside down. They both start talking about inflation and then look deep into each other's eyes and start making out with their masks on. It was a pretty weird.
February 2021

WallStreetBets

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing