Hey, quandale Pringle here,
My boss caught me watching a hottub streamer during work and he squeezed my hog so hard and wouldn't even stop after I banned him.
My brother Cornelius Bartholomew Anderson ringle got caught in an alberian twitch prime and bits scam and got sent to the gulag, but we've snuck him a Nokia 3310 in his ass with a spoon that he'll be using to plan a breakout with my cousin longsdale dimmsdimone slingle.
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My SUSSY POWERS ARE AWAKENING
My SUSSY POWERS ARE AWAKENING ๐ฑ๐
Part 1. I just did my daily jackoff โบ๏ธ to my impostor body pillow, ๐ฑ but when I came, ๐ป I started floating, ๐ฑ and think I got teleported into the skeld. ๐ฎ I swear for a second I felt the imposter's strong hands grip my asscheeks.๐คค ๐ ๐ I immediately was transported back to earth, ๐ญ and I instantly got on all fours on my bed naked, ๐คช as you would, and started screaming in my best efforts to summon the imposter ๐ช
โIM READY FUCK ME FUCK ME FUCK ME FUCK ME PLEASE DADDY IMPOSTERโ
I was so close to feeling the imposters sweet cock fuck the shit out of me ๐คค but then my NAZI RACIST mother came in and beat the shit out of me. ๐๐๐โน๏ธ
She then said I was going to a magical place called the โmental asylumโ 
Iโm not too sure where that dimension is located but it sounds EPIC ๐ฎ
Iโm not too sure where that dimension is located but it sounds EPIC ๐ฎ
Among Us / Amogus
WSB Choose your fighter
Choose your fighter
Alex Magikarp ๐
Elon TechnoCuckLord ๐ค+๐คด
Jeff Divorcedzos ๐
Salmonella ๐ Nutella ๐ซ
Bill "HELL Giga GUH is coming" Clownman ๐คก
Chamath, "I'm abouta fuck shit up" Papaya ๐
Ryan Cocken your butthole ๐ฅ๐ฆ ๐๐๐ณ
๐ฅ Z ๐ฅ U ๐ฅ C ๐ฅ C ๐ฅ
Tim ๐ Bottom ๐
ฑ๏ธENIS
Jack Ma MIA ๐คทโโ๏ธ
Cathie "A prayer a day keeps the ๐ปs' away" or "Jesus, take my buying power" Woods ๐โ๏ธ
WallStreetBets
I heard-a you-a guys-a like-a da pasta!
twitchquotes:
(ยฐ ~อส~ ยฐ)I heard-a you-a guys-a like-a da pasta!(ยฐ ~อส~ ยฐ)
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Trick2g
The Emoji Movie summary
The Emoji Movie unlocks the never-before-seen secret world inside your smartphone. Hidden within the messaging app is Textopolis, a bustling city where all your favorite emojis live, hoping to be selected by the phone's user. In this world, each emoji has only one facial expression - except for Gene, an exuberant emoji who was born without a filter and is bursting with multiple expressions. Determined to become "normal" like the other emojis, Gene enlists the help of his handy best friend Hi-5 and the notorious code breaker emoji Jailbreak. Together, they embark on an epic "app-venture" through the apps on the phone, each its own wild and fun world, to find the Code that will fix Gene. But when a greater danger threatens the phone, the fate of all emojis depends on these three unlikely friends who must save their world before it's deleted forever.
THINKING
twitchquotes:
Every day rushing through my head, like a river that only runs red, Every night when I lay in my bed, I remember every word that you said, I try to stop myself from thinking, And yet I find myself sinking, Deeper and deeper, your lies blinking in my mind, Crushing the only inkling of hope I never knew I could find, On and on these horrible thoughts I can't stop myself, Pulled out of my head like some kind of deranged shelf, I just had anal sex with a gay elf
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