๐hey! ๐spooky๐ sluts itโs ๐ญcocktober ๐
๐happy samhain ๐ come on๐ ghouls๐ปgrab๐ ya crystal๐ balls๐ฎ and hop ๐on a ๐broomsdick ๐the ๐veil๐ is thin๐ tonight ๐so protect ๐ yourself ๐& ๐ซwrap it up ๐ฌ
I used to be a real ad
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Japan heart surgeon and yakuza boss
In Japan ๐ฏ๐ต , heart surgeon โค๏ธ๐จโโ๏ธ . Number one ๐ญโ๏ธ . Steady hand๐ณโ๏ธ. One day, Yakuza boss ๐๐ปneed ๐ heart๐. I do operation๐ชโ๏ธ. But, mistake๐ฑ! Yakuza boss die๐ต๐ช! Yakuza very mad๐ฟ. I hide๐ in fishing boat๐๐ฃ๐ปโโ๏ธ, come to America๐๐๐บ๐ธ. No english๐ค, no food๐ฉ, no money๐๐ซ๐ฒ. Darryl ๐จ๐ฟgive me job๐๐จ๐ปโ๐ผ. Now I have house๐ก, American car ๐ , and new woman ๐๐ฑ๐ปโโ๏ธ. Darryl ๐จ๐ฟsave lifeโ. My big secret๐: I kill โ ๏ธyakuza boss on purpose๐. I good ๐surgeon. The best๐๐ฏ!
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Classic
President's Day Emoji Pasta
ITS PRESIDENTS DAY SLUTS!! ๐จ๐จ๐บ๐ธ๐บ๐ธ๐บ๐ธ๐บ๐ธtime to hop onto that founding father dick๐๐๐๐ด๐ป๐ด๐ป๐ด๐ป๐ด๐ปor should i say founding DADDIES!!!๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐๐๐
๐
๐ฆ๐ฆ out here tryna get rammed from behind ๐๐๐๐harder than the rock of MOUNT RUSHMOREโ๏ธโ๏ธโฐ๐๐george washington mightve been able to survive the harsh โ๏ธโ๏ธ๐ฌwinters๐ฌโ๏ธโ๏ธ of valley forge, but can he handle the conditions between the sheets๐ช๐โโโbe the monica Lewinsky ๐๐ปto my bill clinton๐โโ๏ธ baby and i wont deny i had ๐๐โ๏ธsexual relationsโ๏ธ๐๐ with you!!! crack the whip down harder on your bae than ronald Reagan did on welfare programs๐ธ๐ธ๐คท๐ผโโ๏ธ๐คท๐ผโโ๏ธ๐คท๐ผโโ๏ธโ๐ปsend this to FIVE of your baddest presidential PRINCESSES๐ธ๐ผ๐บ๐ธ๐บ๐ธ๐ธ๐ผwho will throw the nastiest neck๐๐๐ฉ๐ฉ๐๐๐ฌ๐ฆ on this AMERICAN BEAUT OF A DAY๐๐๐๐จโค๏ธ if you get 10 back, be prepared for the president to enter the oval office of you PUSSY tonight๐ฑ๐ฑ๐ฆ๐ฆ๐๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐บ๐ธ๐บ๐ธ๐บ๐ธ
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Holiday Emoji
President's Day
SIMP SUMMER IS OVER
twitchquotes:
SORRY SLUTSโผ๏ธ๐ค๐SIMP SUMMER๐IS OVER๐
๐ปโโ๏ธ๐ซYOU BETTER FUCK OFF ๐๐ผโโ๏ธBECAUSE NO โSIMP โSEPTEMBER HAS ONLY JUST BEGUN๐๐ป๐๐ป YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS ๐๐ณ LOOKS LIKE THE ๐TURKEY๐ ISNT GETTING ANY SLURPY ๐ง TONIGHT๐โผ๏ธ PREPARE ๐ค๐ปUR PUSSIES ๐๐ป๐๐ปFOR A DRY SPELL โ๏ธ CAUSE ITS TIME๐ FOR THE BOYS ๐ค๐ช๐ผTO FOCUS ๐ ON THEMSELVES ๐YOU SLUTS BEST SAVE YOURSELVES FOR THAT GOOD DICK๐๐ป๐ SEND THIS TO 7๏ธโฃ OF YOUR BIGGEST HOES๐ฏโโ๏ธTO LET THEM KNOW YOU'RE READY๐FOR NO โSIMPโSEPTEMBER๐๐ป๐๐ป
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Simps
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OMG you're so FUNNY so quirky
๐๐OMG ๐ youโre so FUNNY ๐คฃ ๐คฃ so quirky ๐๐ ๐คช so different ๐คฉabsolute crackhead energy ๐คช๐คช comedic genius๐ง ๐ I literally canโt โ breathe ๐ญ iโm crying dude ๐ญ๐ญ that was so hilarious ๐ u really got the whole squad laughing ๐จโ๐ฉโ๐งโ๐ฆ๐๐ฉโ๐ฉโ๐ฆโ๐ฆ๐๐จโ๐จโ๐งโ๐ฆ high IQ comedy ๐ง ๐ง howโd you come up with that ๐ง๐ really original work ๐ never seen ๐ or heard ๐ anything like that before ๐ ๐ ๐ great ๐ job ๐๐ keep up the funnies ๐๐คฃ๐ i love you ๐ ๐ youโre my inspiration ๐คฉ๐คฉ๐คฉ if only i were as funny ๐ or smart ๐ค or cool ๐ as you ๐ but its whatever Iโll continue to watch ๐๐๐ your content ๐ฅ๐คณ because it โNEVER EVERโ fails to make me laugh ๐๐ thank you ๐ for existing ๐ and doing what you do โค๏ธโค๏ธ
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VEGAN MAN
twitchquotes:
VEGAN MAN ๐ ๐ Take me by the hand โ lead me to the spam that you understand ๐ ๐ VEGAN MAN ๐ ๐ The voyage ๐ฒ to the top of the ๐deck is a real trip ๐ ๐ VEGAN MAN ๐ ๐ The crust of a Romanian man ๐ณ fueled by the banned ๐ Soaking up the ๐ฆ salt in the spam ๐ฏ
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Kripp