[Copypasta] All intensive purposes

I hole-hardedly agree, but allow me to play doubles advocate here for a moment. For all intensive purposes I think you are wrong. In an age where false morals are a diamond dozen, true virtues are a blessing in the skies. We often put our false morality on a petal stool like a bunch of pre-Madonnas, but you all seem to be taking something very valuable for granite. So I ask of you to mustard up all the strength you can because it is a doggy dog world out there. Although there is some merit to what you are saying it seems like you have a huge ship on your shoulder. In your argument you seem to throw everything in but the kids Nsync, and even though you are having a feel day with this I am here to bring you back into reality. I have a sick sense when it comes to these types of things. It is almost spooky, because I cannot turn a blonde eye to these glaring flaws in your rhetoric. I have zero taller ants when it comes to people spouting out hate in the name of moral righteousness. You just need to remember what comes around is all around, and when supply and command fails you will be the first to go. Make my words, when you get down to brass stacks it doesn't take rocket appliances to get two birds stoned at once. It's clear who makes the pants in this relationship, and sometimes you just have to swallow your prize and accept the facts. You might have to come to this conclusion through denial and error but I swear on my mother's mating name that when you put the petal to the medal you will pass with flying carpets like it’s a peach of cake.
September 2021
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Tyler, you are a role model to other streamers

twitchquotes: Tyler, you are a role model to other streamers where you dont prioritize your subs, you are a man of culture who appreciates many things with your 195 IQ. You solved many of the worlds mysteries and invented 400k viewer records. You make even the worst games winnable and never surrender at 15. You are the sole man to walk the Earth capable of achieving such feats. You will leave your footprints in history books.
twitch chat
March 2018
Tyler1

League of Legends

I finally did it. I out pizza'd the Hut

I finally did it. I out pizza'd the Hut. It was the greatest mistake of my life. After years of perfecting my recipe, I made my way down to the local hut, fresh-baked pizza pie in hand. "Try this," I told the kid working the counter. He did, and he had to agree that it was better than anything Pizza Hut had to offer. Soon, the entire store, customers included, was feasting on my delicious pie. The manager walked over, grabbed a slice, and took a bite. I look at him, anticipation rising. This was the boss, the local fief lord of the Hut. His approval meant more to me than all the rest combined. He took a bite and nodded. "I'll be damned," he said, "you really did it. You out- pizza'd the Hut. Shame." Shame? What did he mean by tha-- the manager pulled a gun out from behind his apron and shot the nearest customer in the head. "We have a Code Jalapeño," he said into his wrist as he executed the remaining customers. "I repeat, we have a Code Jalapeño." The ground was slick with blood. The kid working the counter choked out his dying breath as the manager turned to me. "You just had to do it motherfucker. You just had to out pizza the Hut." He shoved the gun in my face. I was too scared to fight, too scared to run. The manager pulled the trigger. A click. The gun was empty. I threw a chair at the manager and scrambled out of the Pizza Hut, not even bothering to see if my missile hit its mark. I was closely pursued by the manager, who had gotten his hands on a deadly sharp pizza cutter. I suspected in his hands it would cut more than pizza. Somehow, I was able to get into my car and speed off, the manager cursing my existence as I left him behind. I took a deep breath. The manager was clearly psychotic. Yes, that was it, just a crazy man with a gun. It had to be. My phone rang. Sister. I picked it. "They're dead, she sobbed. They're all dead. Mom, Dad, Chris, Bill. Dead. They killed them all." I could barely understand her, so great were her sobs. "What do you mean? Where are you?" I asked urgently. "How is this possi--" A single gunshot sounded through my phone's speakers. Silence. Then, I heard a man's voice. "No one out pizzas the Hut." He hung up. I drove down the empty country road, mind blank. I had nothing. They killed my family. I was alone. At that moment I knew what I had to do. They took everything from me. Well then, I would take everything from them. Pizza Hut was so terrified of being out pizza'd, they forgot there's one thing worse than a man with a recipe: A man with nothing to lose. I'll give them a limited time offer they won't be able to refuse: two bullets for the price of one. With a free side order of pain.
July 2021

Twitch Should Ban The Term “Live-Streaming”

twitchquotes: Twitch Should Ban The Term “Live-Streaming”. It’s offensive to dead people. My great grandparents are dead and I would like to show them some respect and have twitch ban the term “live-streaming”. It’s a slur used against dead people
twitch chat
December 2020

xqcTOS (emote)

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣤⣤⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠁⠀⠘⠛⠛⠿⠿⠛⠛⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠉⢻⣿⣿⠛⠋⠀⠀⣿⡟⠛⠛⠻⣿⡇⠀⣿⣿⠿⠛⠛⠿⠇⠀⠀ ⢠⣶⣦⡀⠀⠀⠘⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⣿⠁⠀⢿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣸⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⣿⡆⠀⠸⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⡆⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⢀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⡇⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠸⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣷⣤⣤⣴⣿⡇⠀⠀⢤⣤⣶⣾⣿⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⡀⠈⠉⠉⠉⢉⣩⣤⣄⣀⣀⣉⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀ ⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣀⣁⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀ ⠘⣻⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠛⠛⠛⠉⠉⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠟⠃⠀ ⢿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣾⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠀⠀⠀ ⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⢛⣿⣄⠈⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠟⠛⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠤⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
June 2021
xQcOW

I sexually identify as a priest player

twitchquotes: I sexually identify as a priest player. Everyday I dream about flying into ranked games and conceding to rank 25 players. Call me retarded. I don't care. I'm beautiful. I'm getting plastic surgery to get my minions silenced for 2 mana. You can now refer to me as Anduinn and respect my right to concede on turn 1. If you can't accept me you're a holy-phobe and need to check your concede privileges. Thank you for being so understanding.
twitch chat
August 2016

Hearthstone

I sexually Identify as

Text-to-Speech Playing