[Copypasta] Popsicle burglaries

twitchquotes: Local police are baffled by a string of strange popsicle burglaries that have taken place over the past few days. The thief appears to be ignoring cash, jewelry, and other valuables, only taking sugary treats from the residents' freezers. Police have yet to apprehend the burglar, but have several reports of a suspicious lanky figure with poor hygiene seen near the crime scenes muttering about "value." Any further information on the popsicle bandit should be reported immediately.
twitch chat
August 2016
Kripp
What happened to this ad? :(
More Kripp Copypastas

7/11 was a part time job

twitchquotes: deIlluminati 7/11 was a part time job deIlluminati
twitch chat
July 2015
Kripp

I'm gonna play this perfectly. Kripp misses lethal.

twitchquotes: Kripparrian grabs Rania by the scruff of her delicate neck, thrusting her to the Hyper-X Ultra-White High-Def gaming chair. The Krippster's rightfully claimed woman presents her rose-hued folds to her master in submission. "Top deck me and #Shrek me, you Romanian stallion" Rania wails in passion. Kripparadino kicks Cattarrian aside, and towers over the chair, "I'm gonna play this perfectly." Kripp misses lethal.
twitch chat
February 2019
Kripp

Hearthstone

Kripp's corgi Fey yips at Kripp

twitchquotes: CorgiDerp "Alright, yip at Kripp, I guess" CorgiDerp "Haven't yipped at Kripp in a while, let's go yip" CorgiDerp "Yipping at Kripp isn't that good, but alright" CorgiDerp
twitch chat
January 2017
Kripp

When Kripp is eat I pretend he is eat me

twitchquotes: When Kripp is eat I pretend he is eat me. I go down Kripp wet Kripp throat and am in warm Kripp stomach. Then I go deeper into the Kripp. I am made into Kripp gold. The Kripp sits on toilet and frees me. I am sad I am no longer Kripp food. Then Kripp eats me again.
twitch chat
June 2015
Kripp

Classic

Kripp and Arthus

twitchquotes: My son the day you were born, the very websites of internet whispered the name: Kripparian.My child, I watched with pride as you grew into a gamer of hardcoreness.Remember, our family always played hardcore with friends and I know you will never play casual scrubcore shit, but the truest hardcoreness is my son is the entertaining your viewers. I tell you this for when my days come to an end you shall not be casual.
twitch chat
April 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing