[Copypasta] Popsicle burglaries

twitchquotes: Local police are baffled by a string of strange popsicle burglaries that have taken place over the past few days. The thief appears to be ignoring cash, jewelry, and other valuables, only taking sugary treats from the residents' freezers. Police have yet to apprehend the burglar, but have several reports of a suspicious lanky figure with poor hygiene seen near the crime scenes muttering about "value." Any further information on the popsicle bandit should be reported immediately.
twitch chat
August 2016
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

We wish you a Merry Krippmas

twitchquotes: Κ• Ν‘β—Š Νœβ—‰ Ν‘β—Š Κ” We wish you a Merry Krippmas, We wish you a Merry Krippmas, We wish you a Merry Krippmas and a Salty New Year. Good top-deckings to you, whereever you are, Good top-deckings for Krippmas, and a Salty New Year. Κ• Ν‘β—Š Νœβ—‰ Ν‘β—Š Κ”
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Worst Matchup

twitchquotes: Worst Matchup: Warrior βœ“ Shaman βœ“ Priest βœ“ Rogue βœ“ Druid βœ“ Warlock βœ“ Hunter βœ“ Mage βœ“ Paladin βœ“
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp

Xi Jinping Tanner

twitchquotes: So you’re going by Kripparian now, nerd? Haha what up, it’s Xi Jinping from China. Me and the other dictators used to give you a hard time. Sorry you were just an easy target. I see your social credit score is still low. Remember Mei Ling, the girl you had a crush on? Yeah, I have her organs now. I forcefully oppress over 1 billion people a year, and run a corrupt government. I guess some things never change, huh? Nice catching up, pathetic..
twitch chat
November 2019
Kripp

Tanner from High School

My daughter was born with a hearing impairment

twitchquotes: My daughter was born with a hearing impairment than ultimately left her deaf shortly after birth. I have been working for years to pay for a new surgery that would allow her to hear again. Today was her 8th birthday and I managed to get her what she's always wanted for her birthday, the sense of hearing. I decided to let her listen in on what Daddy has been watching late at night and I turn on your stream and what do I hear? Silence. Now she's crying thinking she's deaf again, Nice job Kripp.
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

Classic

CHOCOLATE RAIN, HOBGOBLIN INTO CHICKEN WINS THE GAME

twitchquotes: CHOCOLATE RAIN, hobgoblin into chicken wins the game, CHOCOLATE RAIN, turn one coin in missles, Kripp is slain, CHOCOLATE RAIN, fireball the face and feel the pain, CHOCOLATE RAIN, sacrifice the raptor, all in vain, CHOCOLATE RAIN, Kripp that wrecking of Tay was inhumane BibleThump
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp
More Kripp Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing