[Copypasta] Popsicle burglaries

twitchquotes: Local police are baffled by a string of strange popsicle burglaries that have taken place over the past few days. The thief appears to be ignoring cash, jewelry, and other valuables, only taking sugary treats from the residents' freezers. Police have yet to apprehend the burglar, but have several reports of a suspicious lanky figure with poor hygiene seen near the crime scenes muttering about "value." Any further information on the popsicle bandit should be reported immediately.
twitch chat
August 2016
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
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Papparian returns from a business trip

twitchquotes: Hello Kripp, Papparian here. I recently returned from my business trip. All the furniture is gone, my bank accounts are empty and I found out you moved to Europe. What in the heck is going on???
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Lower case is for the lower class

twitchquotes: ╰༼ಠʖ̯ಠ༽ﾉ LOWER CASE IS FOR THE LOWER CLASS ╰༼ಠʖ̯ಠ༽ﾉ
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

I like pom

twitchquotes: I like pom. You read that wrong. You have a dirty mind and I hope you have a bad day. Goodbye and please go to church. Cleanse your mind, soul and body. Thank you.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

I want to become a hearth

twitchquotes: I want to become a hearth. I know there’re people out there just like me, but I’m different. On November 14th, I’m moving to Jamestown; home of the hearths. I’ve cut off my arms, and now light myself on fire everywhere I go as training. I'm not be a hearth yet, but if you give me a chance, I will become the greatest hearth.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Every 60 seconds in Murica, 60000 burgers are digested

twitchquotes: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Eᴠᴇʀʏ 60 sᴇᴄᴏɴᴅs ɪɴ Mᴜʀɪᴄᴀ, 60,000 ʙᴜʀɢᴇʀs ᴀʀᴇ ᴅɪɢᴇsᴛᴇᴅ. Tᴏɢᴇᴛʜᴇʀ ᴡᴇ ᴄᴀɴ sᴛᴏᴘ ᴛʜɪs. Pʟᴇᴀsᴇ sᴘʀᴇᴀᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀᴅ. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
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