[Copypasta] Popsicle burglaries

twitchquotes: Local police are baffled by a string of strange popsicle burglaries that have taken place over the past few days. The thief appears to be ignoring cash, jewelry, and other valuables, only taking sugary treats from the residents' freezers. Police have yet to apprehend the burglar, but have several reports of a suspicious lanky figure with poor hygiene seen near the crime scenes muttering about "value." Any further information on the popsicle bandit should be reported immediately.
twitch chat
August 2016
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Mr. K-Kripp, I charted your win rate for the last month

twitchquotes: monkaS ๐Ÿ‘‰ ๐Ÿ“‰ Um.... Mr. K-Kripp, I charted your win rate for the last month...
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

Kripp's lettuce points

twitchquotes: The year is 2035. Kripp's lettuce points have quickly developed into one of the most valuable crypto currencies in the world. Elsewhere, Tanner sits alone in his dark, dingy apartment, watching Kripp's stream, desperately trying to gamble for some lettuce points. He types "!bet 2 all" in chat, and anxiously awaits the results. Upon seeing Kripp go 0-3, Tanner puts a gun to his head and lets out one final "never lucky" before pulling the trigger.
twitch chat
February 2019
Kripp

Hearthstone

Tanner from High School

Hello, this is Kripp's red shirt

twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

Brofist

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–„โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–ˆ โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–„โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–“โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘ โ–ˆโ–’โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
ascii art
February 2015
Kripp

Chess is too basic for Kripp

twitchquotes: "Well," Kripp drawled, a toothy grin splitting his face, "I think chess is a little too basic a game for me. I mean, only 6 different types of pieces? It's a game for children. No strategy whatsoever" That said, he proceeded to chortle as his opponents Huffer triggered his effigy, creating a Nexus Champion Sarad. "Outplayed."
twitch chat
November 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

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