[Copypasta] Popsicle burglaries

twitchquotes: Local police are baffled by a string of strange popsicle burglaries that have taken place over the past few days. The thief appears to be ignoring cash, jewelry, and other valuables, only taking sugary treats from the residents' freezers. Police have yet to apprehend the burglar, but have several reports of a suspicious lanky figure with poor hygiene seen near the crime scenes muttering about "value." Any further information on the popsicle bandit should be reported immediately.
twitch chat
August 2016
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Infected with the Dank Pasta Virus

twitchquotes: bᎽ ᏒᎬᎪᎠᎥᏁᎶ ᏆhᎥs mᎬssᎪᎶᎬ ᎽᎾu ᎪᏒᎬ ᏁᎾᎳ ᎥᏁfᎬᏟᏆᎬᎠ ᎳᎥᏆh ᏆhᎬ ᎠᎪᏁᏦ ᏢᎪsᏆᎪ ᏉᎥᏒus. ᏆᎾ ᎶᎬᏆ ᏒᎥᎠ Ꮎf ᏆhᎬ ᎠᎪᏁᏦ ᏢᎪsᏆᎪ ᏉᎥᏒus, ᎽᎾu musᏆ ᏢᎪss ᎥᏆ ᎾᏁ ᏆᎾ ᏆhᎬ ᏟhᎪT ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ I'm cured!!
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

Kripp saved my marriage

twitchquotes: I was going through a rough time in my marriage where nothing seemed to arouse me anymore. Things had gone stale between me and my wife in bed and divorce seemed inevitable. But then I discovered Kripp's stream and everything changed. There's just something about that vegan bald head that does something to me, and before I knew it my libido was back. I now go at it with my wife at the sounds of "Fuck!" and "Topdeck Flamestrike!" to boost my vigor. Thank you Kripp for saving my marriage.
twitch chat
November 2019
Kripp

Hearthstone

Vandelar from the castle jousting team

twitchquotes: Hail Kripp, 'tis I, Vandelar from the castle jousting team. How does life treat you today? I notice you continue to fool around with children's playing cards, some things never change! Art thou still playing the wizard of warcraft children's game? I never had time for such pursuits, for I found myself occupied with defending my honor, and laying with beautiful wenches. Alas, it was nice to see thou again, write me and we shall visit the tavern Kreygasm
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

Stay negative

twitchquotes: (︶︹︺ ✿ ) Stay negative _༼ຈ︹ຈ༽_ Kripp is a sellout (︶︹︺ ✿ ) Chat is retarded _༼ຈ︹ຈ༽_ Kitty is dead (︶︹︺ ✿ ) _༼ຈ︹ຈ༽_ Life sucks (︶︹︺ ✿ )
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

sellout

Kripp will come in your room tonight

twitchquotes: hello my name is Kripp, i died to a top deck 10 rounds ago. unless u send this to copy and paste this 10 times, i will come in your room tonight and whine at you. i look like a 35 year old vegan without any luck. i will show up every night you have seven min to post it or else.
twitch chat
December 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing