[Copypasta] Popsicle burglaries

twitchquotes: Local police are baffled by a string of strange popsicle burglaries that have taken place over the past few days. The thief appears to be ignoring cash, jewelry, and other valuables, only taking sugary treats from the residents' freezers. Police have yet to apprehend the burglar, but have several reports of a suspicious lanky figure with poor hygiene seen near the crime scenes muttering about "value." Any further information on the popsicle bandit should be reported immediately.
twitch chat
August 2016
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Maximus Kappacus Spamicus, commander of the Twitch Armies

twitchquotes: <:::::[]=¤༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ My name is Maximus Kappacus Spamicus, commander of the Armies of the Twitch, General of the PJSalt Legions, loyal servant to the true Emperor Kripparrian. Father to a banned son, and husband to a banned wife. I will slay all moderinos, whether in this chat or the next. <:::::[]=¤༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

MODS

salty

Mindnumbingly slow Hearthstone games

twitchquotes: Using footage of Octavian "Kripp" Morosan's mindnumbingly slow Hearthstone games, a landmark sleep study at Cologne University has successfully replicated the brain patterns produced in a comatose state. Lead researcher Don Pepporoni had hopes that this research will be able to cure the thousands of mentally invalid children who have, of late, been reduced to perpetual shitposting on video game streams.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

I'm honestly considering uninstalling PUBG on PC

twitchquotes: (sponsored message) WOW! I love the way this game looks. The graphics are great and the framerate is perfect! I'm honestly considering uninstalling PUBG on PC and just moving over to mobile because this seems like the far superior product. Thank you Kripp for showing me this amazing new game.
twitch chat
April 2018
Kripp

sellout

PlayerUnknown's Battlegrounds

Rob ford messages Kripp

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʏ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ ɪᴛs ʀᴏʙ ғᴏʀᴅ. ᴘʟᴇᴀsᴇ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ʙᴀᴄᴋ ᴛᴏ ᴛᴏʀᴏɴᴛᴏ. ᴡɪᴛʜᴏᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜʀ sᴛʀᴇᴀᴍ ᴏᴜʀ ɢᴅᴘ ɪs ᴅʀᴏᴘᴘɪɴɢ, ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀs ᴀʀᴇ ʀɪᴏᴛɪɴɢ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ sᴛʀᴇᴇᴛs ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛᴀxᴘᴀʏᴇʀs ᴀʀᴇɴ'ᴛ ʜᴀᴘᴘʏ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴍᴇ. ɪ'ᴍ ᴜᴘ ғᴏʀ ʀᴇ-ᴇʟᴇᴄᴛɪᴏɴ ᴀɴᴅ ɴᴇᴇᴅ ʏᴏᴜʀ sᴜᴘᴘᴏʀᴛ. ᴘʟs ɴᴏ ᴄᴏᴘʏᴘᴀsᴛᴇʀɪɴᴏ ᴄʀᴀᴄᴋᴀʀɪɴᴏ.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Kripp after the power outage on December 21, 2013

twitch chat
May 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing