[Copypasta] Popsicle burglaries

twitchquotes: Local police are baffled by a string of strange popsicle burglaries that have taken place over the past few days. The thief appears to be ignoring cash, jewelry, and other valuables, only taking sugary treats from the residents' freezers. Police have yet to apprehend the burglar, but have several reports of a suspicious lanky figure with poor hygiene seen near the crime scenes muttering about "value." Any further information on the popsicle bandit should be reported immediately.
twitch chat
August 2016
Kripp
What happened to this ad? :(
More Kripp Copypastas

Catarrian hungry

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, Catarrian here. Far too long have I meowed and you've ignored my plea for food. Here you are bragging to everybody about the militant "vegan" that you are, yet you neglect animals. It's time everybody knows the truth meow so we can report your sorry Romanian *** to PETA.ᕙ໒(˵ ̄ᴥ ̄˵)७ᕗ
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Do you even ❚█══█❚

twitchquotes: KRIPP do you even ❚█══█❚
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Doritos Chip Pyramid

DoritosChip  DoritosChip  DoritosChip  DoritosChip Only a REAL Chip tastes this good DoritosChip  DoritosChip  DoritosChip "Thats too pro for me!! Too L33t Bro!!!! DoritosChip  DoritosChip I can't beat all of this SKILL man!! Git Gud Bro DoritosChip
twitch chat
August 2016
Kripp

Dennis in a time machine

twitchquotes: The year is 1945. “Dennis,” Kripp speaks breathlessly into the night. “Get back to the time machine. We have what we need here.” A foul smirk plays upon his lips as he pockets a top-secret Nazi folder marked “Top Deck.” Lightning flashes and thunder crashes far across the German mountains. “We will see who says "Salt" now,” he says….
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

get teh tazer

twitchquotes: (▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿) RESISTING ARREST - Get the Tazer (▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿)
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing