[Copypasta] Popsicle burglaries

twitchquotes: Local police are baffled by a string of strange popsicle burglaries that have taken place over the past few days. The thief appears to be ignoring cash, jewelry, and other valuables, only taking sugary treats from the residents' freezers. Police have yet to apprehend the burglar, but have several reports of a suspicious lanky figure with poor hygiene seen near the crime scenes muttering about "value." Any further information on the popsicle bandit should be reported immediately.
twitch chat
August 2016
Kripp
What happened to this ad? :(
More Kripp Copypastas

CATTARIAN WAS A SLOW AND DELICIOUS DINNER

twitchquotes: ( ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°) CATTARIAN WAS A SLOW AND DELICIOUS DINNER ( ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°)
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

Please remove Leifman's mod status

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, it has come to my attention that one of your mods "Leifman" has been abusing his authority as mod and banning people for no good reason. I would appreciate if you took some time out of your schedule to take action and remove his mod status. Thank you!
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Blessings to you, Oh Salty One

twitchquotes: Blessings to you, Oh Salty One. This is Pope Francis, leader of the Catholic Church. My son, why do you avoid choosing Priest for your arena runs? Are you so afraid of attaining Salvation? It worries me that you prefer playing the murderous rogue or the destructive mage to the humble priest. You have sinned much already through your veganism, but atonement can be reached through more Priest runs. Thank you and God Bless.
twitch chat
July 2018
Kripp

Hearthstone

He needed PRECISELY those two inches to win!

twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

This Copypasta Is CRAZY!

i cannot support a stoner kripp

twitchquotes: wow. i cannot support a stoner kripp. i have given thousands of my hard earned money to you but i cannot sit idly by and let you use your platform to promote the devil's lettuce.
twitch chat
December 2018
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing