[Copypasta] Popsicle burglaries

twitchquotes: Local police are baffled by a string of strange popsicle burglaries that have taken place over the past few days. The thief appears to be ignoring cash, jewelry, and other valuables, only taking sugary treats from the residents' freezers. Police have yet to apprehend the burglar, but have several reports of a suspicious lanky figure with poor hygiene seen near the crime scenes muttering about "value." Any further information on the popsicle bandit should be reported immediately.
twitch chat
August 2016
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Can you guys stop typing 'misplay'?

twitchquotes: Can you guys stop typing 'misplay'? We know Kripp is not the best player and he might be a bit slow in the head, but stop pointing out the obvious by typing 'misplay' over and over.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Kripp releasing Hafu nudes cures man's ED

twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Visited by the MIGHTY DREADSTEED of the Nether

twitchquotes: ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ IF YOU SEE THIS WHILE SCROLLING you have been visited by the MIGHTY DREADSTEED of the nether, he will leave you alone BUT only if you COPY and PASTE this message 3 times ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ
twitch chat
September 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

Kripp finally picks Pogo

twitchquotes: Dear Mr. Kripparian, thank you so much for finally picking Pogo! Ever since you picked Pogo, his grades have gone up, he finally got a girlfriend, and he's stopped masturbating all day in his bedroom. I was certain my little Pogo was going to end up a lifeless virgin loser for his entire life, but your kind actions have put Pogo on a path for success. Thank you, thank you, you have my sincerest gratitude. Much love, Pogo's mom.
twitch chat
June 2020
Kripp

Hearthstone

Minion Masters turned my life around

twitchquotes: I was sat in my car with the exhaust connected to the window, waiting to die, until I saw an ad on my phone for Minion Masters, at that moment I turned the engine off and decided to turn my life around. Now I have a 12 inch cock and 3 ferraris, and all it took was the $149.99 package (best value).
twitch chat
March 2019
Kripp

sellout

More Kripp Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing