[Copypasta] Only Ninety's kids will remember This.

There once was a woman who had 100 children. She named each of them after numbers in the order they were born. There was a fire and all of them died except Ninety. Ninety went off to have kids of her own. They were very kind and loving. One day they found an injured dog. They took it home and nursed it back to health. They hid the dog and never told their mother afraid she would kick the dog out . In fact they never told anyone. To keep from arousing any suspicions they named the dog "This" so the name could be used in conversation. One day This ran away. They never saw This again. No one else knew about This. No one even knew a dog named This existed. Only Ninety's kids will remember This.
August 2021
I used to be a real ad
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One off lethal

twitchquotes: Discovering his inner-passion for painting, Kripp leaves Twitch for good and takes Rania and Dex on the road with him to pursue his dream. After six months Kripp realizes being an artist is a lot harder than playing video games. But itโ€™s too late. Homeless and starving, Rania hates Kripp, Dex hates Kripp, and, worst of all, Kripp hates Kripp. Buying a gun one rainy day, he puts it in his mouth and pulls the trigger. *click* He forgot to buy bullets. โ€œOne off lethal,โ€ Rania sobs.
twitch chat
November 2018
Kripp

Urgot demands playtime!

twitchquotes: Dear Mr Rodriguez Qtpie. This is Urgot, the best ranged champion since Thresh ADC. I must confess that I find your consistant playing of other ADCs whilst neglecting me racist. Urgot demands playtime!! Kappa
twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie

The Headbutts will be random

twitchquotes: "Tสœแด‡ สœแด‡แด€แด…ส™แดœแด›แด›s แดกษชสŸสŸ ส™แด‡ ส€แด€ษดแด…แดแด" Kส€ษชแด˜แด˜ แด…แด‡แด„ส€แด‡แด‡s. Aษดแด… sแด แด€ ษดแด‡แดก า“แด€แด„แด›ษชแดษด แดา“ sแดœส™s แดกแด‡ส€แด‡ ส™แดส€ษด. Tสœแด‡ส€แด‡ แดกแด‡ส€แด‡ แด›สœแดsแด‡ แดกสœแด แดกแด‡ส€แด‡ ส™ส€แดา“ษชsแด›แด‡แด…, แด€ษดแด… แด›สœแดsแด‡ แดกสœแด แดกแด‡ส€แด‡ ส™ส€แดส™แดœแด›แด›แด‡แด…. Sแดแดษด แด€ แดกแด€ส€ แด‡ส€แดœแด˜แด›แด‡แด… ส™แด‡แด›แดกแด‡แด‡ษด แด›สœแด‡ แด›แดกแด, แด€ษดแด… แด…แดษดษขแด‡ส€s แด€แด›แด›แด€แด„แด‹แด‡แด… แด…แดษดษขแด‡ส€s, แด€สŸสŸ ส™แด‡แด„แดแดษชษดษข sแด€สŸแด›ส..
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp

Derp face

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
May 2021

Navy Seals Copypasta in Middle English

Bi Godโ€™s bons, hwat didest thou seien of min, thou litel cunte? Thou shalt knouen ich was gradลซฤten best in min classe in soldierie, and ich was in mani-fold skekeries on the Frenshe men, and I hawe more than thre hundred slaghs that ben verried. Ich am expertful in mancowe militaunce, and ich am the best longe-boue archer in all the Englisch hoste. Thou are nout to min but a newe marke. Ich wille thee sottili renden, semble-wise was neverte beholden; par fei! Thou think thou canst afforthe to speken that shite ouer the โ€œInternetโ€? Think-agen, churl! as we speken nou, ich am spฤ“king wit minen aspฤซeris in all of Engellonde, and thin estre bith spฤซen aboute noue, thus thou shalt fore-dighten before the storm, maddok! The storm that wille shenden that spฤซtว’us frivลl thou namest โ€œthine lifโ€. Thou art ded, childe. Ich can ben ought-wher, ought-tym, and ich can slen thou with ouer seven hundred methodes, and all bar-handed! Ich am not only expertful in bar-handed baratri, but ich haue infare to the pleine armurie of the host of engelonde, and ich wille emploien hit for slen thine spitous arse, mandrake mymmerkin. If only thou cว’uthest hauen knouen what unblessed pลซnฤซciว’un thine littel โ€œgleuโ€ glose was about to cause, parchaunce thou hauen holden thine tว’ng stille. But thou cว’uthest nout, thou didest nout, and now thou paien for hit, thou simpleton. Ich wille casten oute furour upon thee, and thou wille senchen in hit. Thou art utterly ded, mannikin.
February 2021

Navy Seal

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