[Copypasta] Only Ninety's kids will remember This.

There once was a woman who had 100 children. She named each of them after numbers in the order they were born. There was a fire and all of them died except Ninety. Ninety went off to have kids of her own. They were very kind and loving. One day they found an injured dog. They took it home and nursed it back to health. They hid the dog and never told their mother afraid she would kick the dog out . In fact they never told anyone. To keep from arousing any suspicions they named the dog "This" so the name could be used in conversation. One day This ran away. They never saw This again. No one else knew about This. No one even knew a dog named This existed. Only Ninety's kids will remember This.
August 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Surf, Psychic, Thunder, Blizzard

twitchquotes: Surf, Psychic, Thunder, Blizzard. There was a time when all 4 moves were used to achieve teh urn. But all that changed when the e4 attacked. Only the avatar, master of all 4 moves could stop them. But when the chat needed him most, he missed! 26 e4 attempts later and we keep losing. Some believe that pc will ruin the team. But I haven't lost hope, I still believe Starmie can save teh urn.
twitch chat
May 2019
TwitchPlaysPokemon

Priced in

Don't even ask the question. The answer is yes, it's priced in. Think Amazon will beat the next earnings? That's already been priced in. You work at the drive thru for Mickey D's and found out that the burgers are made of human meat? Priced in. You think insiders don't already know that? The market is an all powerful, all encompassing being that knows the very inner workings of your subconscious before you were even born. Your very existence was priced in decades ago when the market was valuing Standard Oil's expected future earnings based on population growth that would lead to your birth, what age you would get a car, how many times you would drive your car every week, how many times you take the bus/train, etc. Anything you can think of has already been priced in, even the things you aren't thinking of. You have no original thoughts. Your consciousness is just an illusion, a product of the omniscent market. Free will is a myth. The market sees all, knows all and will be there from the beginning of time until the end of the universe (the market has already priced in the heat death of the universe). So please, before you make a post on wsb asking whether AAPL has priced in earpods 11 sales or whatever, know that it has already been priced in and don't ask such a dumb fucking question again.
December 2020

Classic

WallStreetBets

Hi Kripp, Google again here

twitchquotes: Kripp, Google again here. We've noticed that you've been away from Twitch for at least 2 minutes in the past. We're just wondering if everything is okay. Is it still the merchandise? We're serious about raising the price if it's a problem to you. We just want you to have fun, and to of course buy more Twitch merchandise. Our Viewbots are ready to bring you (mostly us) much ad revenue. Thank you Kripp, hope to see you soon
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Viewbots

Creepy frontal pepe smile

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠛⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣟⠟⠉⠋⠉⠛⠛⠻⢿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠹⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠟⠁⠀⢀⡤⠖⠒⠛⠛⠒⠒⠲⠤⣄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡿⠃⠀⠀⡔⣁⡤⠖⠒⠛⠛⠛⠛⠒⠒⠤⣉⠳⣆⣠⠞⢉⣁⡤⠤⠤⠤⣀⣀⡉⠛⢶⣄⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡅⠀⠀⢸⠏⠁⠀⠀⢀⣀⣤⣄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠳⣼⡧⠞⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠓⠦⣙⢦⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿ ⡏⡇⠀⠀⡎⠀⠀⢀⣾⣟⢙⣿⠿⢿⣷⡄⠀⠀⠀⢸⠁⠀⠀⢠⣴⡾⣿⡿⢻⣷⣦⡀⠀⠈⢻⡇⠀⠐⠛⣿ ⠟⠁⠀⠀⢱⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣧⣀⣠⣿⣿⠄⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⢠⣿⣇⣀⣼⣷⣾⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⢠⠃⠀⠈⠛⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠱⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⣠⣾⣆⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢀⡴⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙ ⣰⠞⠛⠲⢄⡀⠀⠉⠛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠶⠖⠚⠁⠀⠙⠷⣌⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⠀⠀⠀⣀⡤⢤⡀ ⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠢⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠴⠛⠁⠀⠀⢻ ⠹⣇⠀⢳⣄⡀⠀⠈⠙⠦⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⠖⠋⠀⠀⣀⣤⠀⠀⡼ ⠀⠘⣦⠀⠹⣍⠒⠤⣀⡀⠀⠉⠓⠶⠤⣤⣄⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣤⠤⠴⠖⠛⠉⠀⣀⠤⠒⢉⡴⠁⢀⠞⠁ ⠄⠀⠈⠳⣄⠈⠓⢤⡀⠉⠁⠒⠤⢤⣀⡀⠀⠀⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⡠⠤⠒⠉⢁⣠⠖⠁⢀⡴⠋⠀⢀ ⣯⣆⠀⠀⠈⠳⢤⣀⠙⠲⢤⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⢀⣀⠴⠒⠉⢀⣤⠞⠁⠀⠀⠠⣾ ⣿⣿⣧⣄⠀⠀⠀⠉⠓⠦⣄⣀⠉⠙⠒⠒⠲⠤⠤⠤⠤⠤⠤⠔⠒⠒⠋⠉⣀⣠⠴⠚⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡦⣶⠤⣤⣀⡀⠈⠙⠓⠒⠶⠤⠤⠤⣤⠤⠤⠤⠴⠶⠖⠛⠋⠁⠀⠀⢀⣀⠤⠶⣶⣴⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠁⠒⠒⠒⠶⠦⠤⠤⠤⠤⠤⠤⠤⠴⠶⠖⠒⠊⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿
June 2021

Pepe

Somewhere in a parallel universe, Europe didn't need to be saved by America

twitchquotes: ★  ★ ° ☾ ☆ ¸. ¸  ★  :.  . • ○ ° ★  .  * . .  ¸ .   °  ¸. * ● ¸ . ...somewhere   ° ☾ °  ¸. ● ¸ .  ★ ° :.  . • °   .  * :. .in a parallel universe* ● ¸     ° ☾ °☆  . * ¸.   ★ ★ ° . .    . ☾ °☆  . * ● ¸ ..EUROPE...° ☾ ★ °● ¸ .   ★ ° :.  . • ○ ° ★  .  * DIDN'T NEED TO BE SAVED BY AMERICA ☾ ★ °● ¸ .   ★ °
twitch chat
December 2014

Classic

EU vs NA

Text-to-Speech Playing