[Copypasta] what do you think the billions of dollars smell like

twitchquotes: Do you think that Jeff Bezos gets embarrassed when Twitch mobile has a 10 second delay in front of his billions of dollars? Sorry if this offends anyone but I thought it was a funny thing haha. And I would like to know if any of you have pics of Jeff Bezos looking nervous or embarrassed in front of chat I just want to see it for a few laughs haha. Another thing I am wondering is what do you think the billions of dollars smell like I am just curious for laughs haha I would like to smell them
twitch chat
July 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

We require you to change your Twitch name to hl_kripp

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparino, this is Noah Liferino, CEO of No Life Incorporated©. As you may already know, we are requiring you to change your Twitch name to hl_kripp (has life) as you no longer are a "no life". This was stated in the contract you signed under section 6 article 9 paragraph 420. This is to be enforced immediately.
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March 2015
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Sesame Street Celebrity Recruitment Department

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparian. Its Becky from the Sesame Street Celebrity Recruitment Department. Although "E-Sports" has indeed become mainstream, we unfortunately have declined your application to be on an episode of Sesame Street. We have already filmed the episode where "K" is the letter of the day. Thank you for your interest.
twitch chat
October 2015
Kripp

Hey, vsauce, Micheal here! Why is my peepee hard? Or is it?

Hey, vsauce, Micheal here! Why is my peepee hard? Or is it? Well, ya see, we need to start with the peepee itself. The hardening of the peepee is called an erection. Erection. The term itself shares a similarity with our own predecessors, Homo Erectus. That's Latin for Gay Straight. So, naturally, we can start to fill in the picture. Our predecessors, Gay Straights, also had hard peepees. Which brings us back to modern day erections. You see, an erection is a signal to tell you that you are gay, a leftover device from the era of Gay Straights. But what is "gay"? To quote Nelson Mandela, "To be gay is not to love others. It is to love yourself and to stay true in the face of many hardships and hard dicks." In Layman's terms, Nelson Mandela is trying to tell us to go fuck ourselves. This is vital to know because it puts into perspective the absolute size of gayness itself, divided into unique homogenous subgroups. Such a diverse range is exactly why the flag of LGBTQBBQ communities is a rainbow. But, you ask, how does this tie in to what gay Is? I'm getting there. Gay is a slang term for homosexual, which is to have sexual interest in someone of the same gender as yourself. To see more on the topic of gender, click the annotation on my face now for a playlist of videos specifically on the subject. So, to answer your question, your peepee is hard because you're gay. Hopefully today's little snippet was a good brain train for you. If you'd like to find other fun ways to test your mind mettle, click the annotation up here to go see some of my huge DONGs. And, as always, thanks for watching.
August 2021

I like to drink my milk

twitchquotes: I like to drink my milk<༼ຈل͜ຈ༽> I do it all the time ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ and every time I drink it┌༼ຈل͜ຈ ┐ Kripp starts to scream and whine ┌༼@ل͜@༽┐ But never need to worry ༼ ºل͟º༽ my Bones are staying strong ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Wikipedia donation request

To all our readers in the U.S., Please don't scroll past this. This Friday we humbly ask you to defend Wikipedia's future. 98% of our readers don't give; they simply look the other way. If you are an exceptional reader who has already donated, we sincerely thank you. If you donate just $2.75 today, Wikipedia could keep thriving in the long term. We ask you, humbly: please don’t scroll away. If Wikipedia has given you $2.75 worth of knowledge, take a minute to donate to the Wikimedia Endowment. Show the world that access to reliable, neutral information matters to you. Thank you.
January 2022
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