[Copypasta] GabeN says James is an ass

twitchquotes: James. We've had issues with James at previous events. Some Valve people lobbied to bring him back for Shanghai, feeling that he deserved another chance. That was a mistake. James is an ass, and we won't be working with him again.
twitch chat
June 2019

Classic

Dota 2

I used to be a real ad
More Classic Copypastas

Shrek is love. Shrek is life

I was only nine years old. I loved Shrek so much, I had all the merchandise and movies. I'd pray to Shrek every night before I go to bed, thanking for the life I've been given. "Shrek is love", I would say, "Shrek is life". My dad hears me and calls me a faggot. I knew he was just jealous for my devotion of Shrek. I called him a cunt. He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep. I'm crying now and my face hurts. I lay in bed and it's really cold. A warmth is moving towards me. I feel something touch me. It's Shrek. I'm so happy. He whispers in my ear, "This is my swamp". He grabs me with his powerful ogre hands, and puts me on my hands and knees. I spread my ass-cheeks for Shrek. He penetrates my butthole. It hurts so much, but I do it for Shrek. I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water. I push against his force. I want to please Shrek. He roars a mighty roar, as he fills my butt with his love. My dad walks in. Shrek looks him straight in the eye, and says, "It's all ogre now". Shrek leaves through my window. Shrek is love. Shrek is life.ο»Ώ
February 2021

Shrek

Classic

With this chant I summon spam to the chat!

twitchquotes: β•°( Ν‘Β° ΝœΚ– Ν‘Β° )γ€β”€β”€β˜†γƒ»οΎŸClickity Clack, Clickity Clack, with this chant I summon spam to the chat! β•°( Ν‘Β° ΝœΚ– Ν‘Β° )γ€β”€β”€β˜†γƒ»οΎŸ
twitch chat
November 2014

Classic

Rick Astley paradox

twitchquotes: If you ask Rick Astley for a DVD of the movie Up, he won’t give it to you because he’s never gonna give you Up. However, by not giving you Up like you asked for it, he’s letting you down. This is known as the Astley paradox.
twitch chat
June 2020

Classic

Somewhere in a parallel universe, Europe didn't need to be saved by America

twitchquotes: β˜…γ€€γ€€β˜… Β° ☾ β˜† ΒΈ. ΒΈ γ€€β˜…γ€€ :.γ€€ . β€’ β—‹ Β° β˜…γ€€ .γ€€ *γ€€.γ€€.γ€€γ€€ΒΈ .γ€€γ€€ Β° γ€€ΒΈ. * ● ΒΈ .γ€€...somewhereγ€€γ€€γ€€Β° ☾ Β° γ€€ΒΈ. ● ΒΈ .γ€€γ€€β˜…γ€€Β° :.γ€€ . β€’ Β° γ€€ .γ€€ *γ€€:.γ€€.in a parallel universe* ● ΒΈ γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€Β° ☾ Β°β˜† γ€€. * ΒΈ.γ€€γ€€γ€€β˜…γ€€β˜… Β° . .γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€.γ€€β˜Ύ Β°β˜† γ€€. * ● ΒΈ ..EUROPE...Β° β˜Ύγ€€β˜… °● ΒΈ .γ€€γ€€γ€€β˜…γ€€Β° :.γ€€ . β€’ β—‹ Β° β˜…γ€€ .γ€€ * DIDN'T NEED TO BE SAVED BY AMERICA β˜Ύγ€€β˜… °● ΒΈ .γ€€γ€€γ€€β˜…γ€€Β°
twitch chat
December 2014

Classic

EU vs NA

This is probably the worst thing I've ever seen

This is probably the worst thing I've ever seen. 100 years from now when I'm dying on a hospital bed and I'm asked what my biggest regret was it will be that I turned on my internet and scrolled through the internet on that fateful day... I will never be able to recover from this. No amount of therapy will save me. No amount of prescription pills will let me recover. I am a shell. This memory is so bad my brain is physically rejecting it and now I have a headache every time I think about it. Why did you post this, thinking it was a good idea? You've permanently ruined my life because of this, I hope you're happy. I hope that one day this gets branded as a war crime and you get hauled off to prison, never to see the light of day again. The fact that you're already not in a psych ward for insanity is so baffling I have lost all faith in every kind of justice system. If you subscribe to any religion, you'd best spend the rest of your time atoning for this ultimate sin. Have a terrible day, I hope this creation of yours haunts you in your dreams.
January 2021

Classic

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