[Copypasta] I fucking hate Stuart Little

twitchquotes: I fucking hate Stuart Little. I know what you’re thinking, this is some kind of funny joke, but no. Stuart Little is a piece of shit. A damn rat got picked over actual children at an orphanage and he’s supposed to be a hero? And I can’t even tell you how many damn times I’ve seen a great parking space only to turn the corner and realise Stuart Little is already parked there in his stupid little fucking convertible. He took my wife and the kids and my house and my job. I swear to fucking god, I’m going to kill myself and take that goddamn rodent to hell with me. Stuart Little has ruined my family. Last summer, I approached the miserable mouse in the street, and asked him for his autograph, because my son is a huge fan. The fucking rat gave me the autograph and told me to burn in hell. Later, when I gave my son the autograph he started crying and said he hated me. Turns out the mousefucker didnt write his autograph, no, he wrote “you’re a piece of shit, and i fucked your mom”. I’m now divorced, and planning a huge class-action lawsuit against the white devil that ruined my life. Your time is almost over, Stuart. All the people you’ve wronged will rise against you.
twitch chat
May 2020
I used to be a real ad
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OpieOP

twitchquotes: ᴌOpieOPށ ᴌOpieOPށ ᴌOpieOPށ
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forsenSheffy

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ascii art
November 2021
Forsen

Emote

All Cops Are Sus (ACAS)

Instead of saying ACAB(all cops are bastar*ds) we should start saying ACAS(all cops are sus). Think about it, it's less offensive and it only shows that we think that a cop might be sus(suspicious) of something but not necesseraly guilty of it. It's the same thing in the popular game amogus with thinking that all red players are impostors really. This might sound stupid but hear me out. Statistically, every player regardless of their color has the same chance of being the impostor, yet, there is this social stigma that only red players are impostors. However, players of Amugus have developed this great system that will help them show their suspicion on someone without saying that they are the impostor(in case that they actually aren't). They say that someone is 'sus' so nobody gets their feelings hurt. We can apply this knowledge to the real world, right? If everyone can be an impostor in amongsus, regardless of their color, so can anyone be a bastard in real world, regardless of their task(job as some low inteligence individuals might call it).
April 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Disgrace to all Morosans

twitchquotes: Ｏｃｔａｖｉａｎ Ｍｏｒｏｓａｎ， ｔｈｉｓ ｉｓ ｙｏｕｒ ｇｒｅａｔ ｇｒｅａｔ ｇｒａｎｄｐａｒｒｉａｎ， Ｉ ａｍ ｃｏｎｔａｃｔｉｎｇ ｙｏｕ ｆｒｏｍ ｂｅｙｏｎｄ ｔｈｅ ｇｒａｖｅ ｔｏ ｔｅｌｌ ｙｏｕ ｔｈａｔ ｙｏｕ ａｒｅ ａ ｄｉｓｇｒａｃｅ ｔｏ ａｌｌ Ｍｏｒｏｓａｎｓ ｂｅｃａｕｓｅ ｏｆ ｙｏｕｒ ｒｅｃｅｎｔ ｓｗｉｔｃｈ ｔｏ ｂｅｉｎｇ ａ ｃａｓｕａｌ． Ｐｌｓ ｎｏ Ｍａｓｅｒａｔｉ
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Just as the founding fathers intended

I own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
November 2020
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