[Copypasta] I fucking hate Stuart Little

twitchquotes: I fucking hate Stuart Little. I know what you’re thinking, this is some kind of funny joke, but no. Stuart Little is a piece of shit. A damn rat got picked over actual children at an orphanage and he’s supposed to be a hero? And I can’t even tell you how many damn times I’ve seen a great parking space only to turn the corner and realise Stuart Little is already parked there in his stupid little fucking convertible. He took my wife and the kids and my house and my job. I swear to fucking god, I’m going to kill myself and take that goddamn rodent to hell with me. Stuart Little has ruined my family. Last summer, I approached the miserable mouse in the street, and asked him for his autograph, because my son is a huge fan. The fucking rat gave me the autograph and told me to burn in hell. Later, when I gave my son the autograph he started crying and said he hated me. Turns out the mousefucker didnt write his autograph, no, he wrote “you’re a piece of shit, and i fucked your mom”. I’m now divorced, and planning a huge class-action lawsuit against the white devil that ruined my life. Your time is almost over, Stuart. All the people you’ve wronged will rise against you.
twitch chat
May 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
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A physicist called Octavian

twitchquotes: The year is 2027. A physicist called Octavian has created the first inter-dimensional portal capable of exploring alternate galaxies. "Finally, I have done it..." he says as he steps into the portal. He enters a room where he sees himself giving a "Brofist" to his computer. His only reaction: " FailFish ".
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Kripp

if my girl and fidget spinner both dying

twitchquotes: if my girl👧😍and fidget spinner߷ both dying😱and I can only save one 😤😬catch me at her funeral 😔👻🌹spinning ߷ through ߷ the ߷ pain ߷ 💯 😎
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June 2017

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AngelThump v2

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⣿⣿⠿⠋⢀⣠⣤⣄⡀⠙⢿⡿⠛⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢠⣶⣦⡈⠃⡠⡺⢿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠦⠀⢠⣾⣿⣆⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⣰⣿⣿⣿⡟⢠⠸⠟⠈⠛⠛⠛⠸⠿⡀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣧⣈⠛⢿⣿⣿ ⠿⠟⢋⣠⣾⣿⣿⢿⣻⣇⢸⡀⠀⢸⣦⣤⣾⡇⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣄⠙ ⣀⠚⠛⠛⣽⡿⠃⠛⣠⣤⡀⠃⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⢀⣴⣦⣙⣘⠛⠗⢉⣁⣴ ⣿⣿⣿⣤⣁⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠙⠛⠛⠛⠉⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣿⣿
November 2020

Give the Kitty 200 kissy wissy's on his little tum tum

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, this is Kenneth J. Nipplemeyer IV, sole heir to the Nipplemeyer fortune. I am willing to give you the entirety of my family's $26 Billion Fortune if you give the Kitty 200 kissy wissy's on his little tum tum on stream. Must be done enthusiastically and at 60fps or no deal. Sincerely. Kenneth aka "the Nippster"
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

it will look like a copy pasta

twitchquotes: i bet if i just type out a paragraph plat chat will copy pasta it. literally there is nothing funny or interesting about this text but it is pretty long so it will look like a copy pasta.
twitch chat
March 2018
Text-to-Speech Playing