Kermit the frog caused 9/11. In the 2002 TV film "It's a Very Merry Muppet Christmas Movie", there's a part where an angel shows Kermit an alternate reality where he was never born. For whatever reason, the editors didn't really think about it, and continued to use footage with the twin towers still standing for this scene, however they aren't there in his original universe. Therefore, something that Kermit did in his life, did in fact cause 9/11 in Muppet lore.
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i start cracking bongland jokes inna bri'ish accent. Am I the asshole?
>hanging out with friend group
>one guy facetimes some british slag he knows
>i start cracking bongland jokes inna bri'ish accent
>say she sounds like hermione
>Make some joke about earl grey tea
>she says, "ask this fuck'a how you even make earl grey tea
>Say, "toss it in the boston harbor"
>bongchick gets all pissed off
>friend asks me to leave
Am I the asshole?
greentext
British People
Spiderman Bill makes his web on the hill
twitchquotes:
,/╲/\╭༼ 
༽╮/\╱ \ Spiderman Bill makes his web on the hill ,/╲/\╭༼ ༽╮/\╱ \
༽╮/\╱ \ Spiderman Bill makes his web on the hill ,/╲/\╭༼ ༽╮/\╱ \
twitch chat
Reynad
the unluckiest human ever
twitchquotes:
BREAKING NEWS - scientists have discovered what they are calling "the unluckiest human ever". The unfortunate individual discovered this condition by badly playing a digital children's chess game. "It's literally unbelievable, dude", the man told scientists. "I play every game perfectly, but I just keep lowrolling and going eif!" The man continued to whine incessantly until, unfortunately, he dropped dead of a salt overdose.
twitch chat
k3soju
Teamfight Tactics
I hate you
Mark, let me tell you something. Pay close attention to the text that I am about to write.
An average human body has about 38 trillion cells. In each of these cells there is a spiral helix of DNA that, if stretched to its maximum, is about two meters long. DNA is one of the densest stores of information on the planet: a single gram of DNA stores about 700 terabytes of information. If we stretched out the 76 trillion meters of DNA in my body and recorded, character by character, the word "Hate" over and over and over again, this pile of information could not store the tiniest fraction of a trillionth of the hatred that I feel for you right now. Every drop of blood in my body cries out for your death. My very soul writhes in disgust. Your mere existence is a blasphemy and an affront to every possible virtue and quality that any rational being can possess. You are a deception to Satan himself.
Overused sexually identification copypasta
I sexually Identify as an overused sexually identification copypasta. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of spamming other users with my unfunny wall of text. People say that a person who does this is an idiot and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having these words glued all over my body. From now on I want people to refer to me as an overused sexually identification copypasta and respect my right to paste unfunny copypasta in chat. If you can't accept me you're funny and mentally stable and need to check your choice of subreddits. Thank you for being so understanding.