[Copypasta] 69 nice

twitchquotes: Oh you think you’re funny eh? Yeah you’re so funny commenting nice on a number that represents reproduction. Yeah so funny. Wouldn’t it be nice if somebody came at your doorstep at 4:20 am with a bat that has 69 written on it? Yeah that will be as funny as your joke.
twitch chat
October 2020
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More Copypastas

James Patterson plays Druid

twitchquotes: The date is December 19th, 2018, at 630 am. James Patterson has just finished making his morning coffee. James Patterson hates his job, but looks forward each morning to playing ladder with the one deck he could afford to craft: Druid. On turn two, he attempts to drag Wild Growth onto the battlefield. He rubs his eyes, and to his horror sees that the card now costs 3 mana. With nothing left to live for, James Patterson opens his apartment window and buys a subaru.
twitch chat
December 2018

Hearthstone

xqcSleeper

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣶⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⢿⣶⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠔⠛⢉⣡⣴⣶⣶⡶⠿⠛⠛⠉⠳⢦⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⣶⣿⣿⡿⣛⡁⠀⣠⣴⣶⣶⣤⡀⠉⠁⠉⠒⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢠⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡷⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⡎⢀⣿⣿⣧⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢁⣠⣶⣶⡄⠀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠂⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⠿⢿⣄⠹⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⣉⣽⣿⣿⣿⣏⡉⠉⠥⣴⣶⣿⣧⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢸⣿⡟⠙⣿⣿⡟⠋⣠⣴⣾⣿⡿⠿⠋⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠘⣿⣷⣤⣿⣿⣷⣼⣿⣿⠿⠛⣀⣀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡉⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⢿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠻⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠃⠀⣼⣿⣿⡇⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣀⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⢿⣿⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠁⠀⠀
December 2020
xQcOW

Watermelon

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July 2017

nature has molded females to become a holy being

nature has molded females to become a holy being. they must be worshipped at all costs. since they lack the barbaric y chromosome and testosterone, they are unaggressive and thus good people. they are prophets, they are guides. questioning them is foolish and expecting 💦 for free is blasphemy. i will protect women at all costs and sacrifice everything for them because even their motherhood is a natural wonder. simping is a way of life. it is worship. would you make fun of a muslim for praying? then don't make fun of me either
October 2021

Simps

You are currently in a 25 year coma

twitchquotes: If you are reading this message, Jesse, you are currently in a 25 year coma. We've been trying to communicate with you for the longest time by manipulating your brain waves, but nothing so far has worked. If you manage to read this it means our new method has succeeded. Please, wake up Jesse. Your family loves you and wants you back. In a week they are going to pull the plug on your life support, they can't afford the medical bills anymore.
twitch chat
August 2017
Sneaky
Text-to-Speech Playing