[Copypasta] 69 nice

twitchquotes: Oh you think you’re funny eh? Yeah you’re so funny commenting nice on a number that represents reproduction. Yeah so funny. Wouldn’t it be nice if somebody came at your doorstep at 4:20 am with a bat that has 69 written on it? Yeah that will be as funny as your joke.
twitch chat
October 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Look, kid. You wanna give up?

twitchquotes: Look, 👀 kid. 👦 You 👈 wanna 🙈 give 👉 up? 🔺 Fine. 👌 But 🍑 you 👈 didn't 🚫 get 🔟 here 👏 by 😈 giving 😘 up. 🔺 You 👈 didn't 🚫 get 🔟 this 👈 far 🌌 by 😈 giving 😘 up. 🔺 You 👈 didn't 🚫 get 🔟 all 💯 these 👈 followers, fans, admirers, and 👏 hot 🔥 groupies by 😈 giving 😘 up. 🔺 Don't 🚫 give 👉 up. 🔺 You're 👉 the 👏 champ. You're 👉 the 👏 boshy.
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September 2017
MOONMOON

G2, aka “Gold 2”

twitchquotes: G2, aka “Gold 2”, named after their players average skill level. They are currently the best team in EU and are best known for their inting midlaner, CRAPS, and their inability to defeat PVB, Vietnam’s worst team.
twitch chat
September 2019
Riot Games

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Never lucky veganism

twitchquotes: In a new study scientists aimed to find the origin of luck by studying an internet celebrity known as Kripparian, famous for playing a children's card game for thousands to watch, after inumerous claims of being "never lucky" while playing said game. The scientists eventually isolated a single variable known only to this particular individual: veganism. While it might yet be soon to draw any conclusions, scientists seem to agree that a meat-rich diet is indeed the cure for "never lucky".
twitch chat
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I saw exactly 1.09441 square inches of a girls shoulder today

I saw exactly 1.09441 square inches of a girls shoulder today, I immediately fell to my knees, as the rush of dopamine signaling my impending, earth shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen EVERYONE in the immediate vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever had, or ever will produce shot out SO HARD that my dick was ripped apart by my Übernut, accelerating to 5% of the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. It vaporized the girl as it punched right through her, it barely slowed before cutting through a structural support beam in the school as if it were a nuclear powered angle grinder. the sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path caused the school to collapse, and every female in the state of illinois became pregnant with my children.
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