[Copypasta] Roses are red, I'm flexing today

twitchquotes: 💪 😂 roses are red 💪 😂 violets are blue 💪 😂 i'm flexing today 💪 😂 why aren't you?? 💪 😂
twitch chat
September 2017
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

How traders politely decline the second date

I discovered recently if I am on a date and I’m not that interested in a second, all I need to do is start talking about my stocks. They won’t ask for another one then, I won’t have to politely decline.
December 2021

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We The Sus Music changed my dad

So my dad is a raging homophobe. When I was 7 yrs old he nearly beat me to death for sleeping in the same bed as my friend in Minecraft. He overheard me listening to this song and burst into my room. I braced for impact, fearing the worst. Instead he remained silent and I saw this strange look in his eyes that I'd never seen before. He just divorced my mom and told us he is moving to Puerto Rico with his longtime partner Antonio Banderas and he's not coming back. Thank you We The Sus Music!
June 2021

Kripp's corgi Fey yips at Kripp

twitchquotes: CorgiDerp "Alright, yip at Kripp, I guess" CorgiDerp "Haven't yipped at Kripp in a while, let's go yip" CorgiDerp "Yipping at Kripp isn't that good, but alright" CorgiDerp
twitch chat
January 2017
Kripp

I hate you

Mark, let me tell you something. Pay close attention to the text that I am about to write. An average human body has about 38 trillion cells. In each of these cells there is a spiral helix of DNA that, if stretched to its maximum, is about two meters long. DNA is one of the densest stores of information on the planet: a single gram of DNA stores about 700 terabytes of information. If we stretched out the 76 trillion meters of DNA in my body and recorded, character by character, the word "Hate" over and over and over again, this pile of information could not store the tiniest fraction of a trillionth of the hatred that I feel for you right now. Every drop of blood in my body cries out for your death. My very soul writhes in disgust. Your mere existence is a blasphemy and an affront to every possible virtue and quality that any rational being can possess. You are a deception to Satan himself.
August 2021

McAfee didn't kill himself

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ஜ۩☆۩ஜ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ ☆★☆ 𝐌𝐂𝐀𝐅𝐅𝐄𝐄 𝐃𝐈𝐃𝐍'𝐓 𝐊𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝐇𝐈𝐌𝐒𝐄𝐋𝐅 ☆★☆ ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ஜ۩☆۩ஜ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬
June 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing