πͺ π roses are red πͺ π violets are blue πͺ π i'm flexing today πͺ π why aren't you?? πͺ π
I used to be a real ad
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Kripp's kidney stone surgery
twitchquotes:There was a heated discussion among the medical experts gathered around an operating table, on which laid an unconscious Romanian man in his 30s. "The salt levels are off the charts!" exclaimed a cardiologist. The head surgeon sighs, "I guess this is what you get when you combine a vegan diet and a sedentary lifestyle playing a children's card game." Upon those words the body suddenly stirs, from which a muted voice barely croaks, "Tell...Rania...not to press...the button".
There was a heated discussion among the medical experts gathered around an operating table, on which laid an unconscious Romanian man in his 30s. "The salt levels are off the charts!" exclaimed a cardiologist. The head surgeon sighs, "I guess this is what you get when you combine a vegan diet and a sedentary lifestyle playing a children's card game." Upon those words the body suddenly stirs, from which a muted voice barely croaks, "Tell...Rania...not to press...the button".
When I was 13, I came out to my parents as a Morbius male.
When i was 13, i came out to my parents as a morbius male. They couldnt accept my morbality, so they sent me off to camp. They just didnt understandβ i was morbed that way. At the camp, they gave us electromorb therapy to morb us into beta males. I resisted the treatment, being a morbius male, you cant morb me out of being morbed. I fooled the counselors into thinking they had successfully morbed be into a beta male, and i returned home. To this day, i live a double lifeβ one for my parents, who still cannot accept morbality, and one where its always morbin time.
When i was 13, i came out to my parents as a morbius male. They couldnt accept my morbality, so they sent me off to camp. They just didnt understandβ i was morbed that way. At the camp, they gave us electromorb therapy to morb us into beta males. I resisted the treatment, being a morbius male, you cant morb me out of being morbed. I fooled the counselors into thinking they had successfully morbed be into a beta male, and i returned home. To this day, i live a double lifeβ one for my parents, who still cannot accept morbality, and one where its always morbin time.
Every fucking time I pass by the kitchen I canβt resist but stick my dick in the Nesquik cereal box. It doesnβt matter if the cereal hurts my tip, I thrust it in as fast as I can. I donβt care if my grandma cries for me to stop, I canβt resist looking at his goddamn face; yeah, thatβs right, the Nesquik bunnyβs face. As I masturbate in chocolate cereal balls I imagine the Nesquik bunny begging me to destroy his ass, and then ejaculating chocolate milk all over my face as I grant his wish. Normal people disgust me, my only sex drive is towards that fucking bunny; since the first time Iβve seen his sexy ass I canβt restrain myself from cumming in the chocolate cereal box at least twice a day. Everyone in the house thinks that Iβm crazy and that I need some kind of therapy, but truth is, Iβm the only sane one here.
I hate taking shits
I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.
TL;DR I hate shitting
I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.
TL;DR I hate shitting
You guessed it right, I'm SUMMIT1G
twitchquotes: MY GRAGAS IS BAD MY CHO'GATH IS FREE YOU GUESSED IT RIGHT IM SUMMIT1G