[Copypasta] Not funny I didn't laugh

Not funny I didn't laugh. Your joke is so bad I would have preferred the joke went over my head and you gave up re-telling me the joke. To be honest this is a horrid attempt at trying to get a laugh out of me. Not a chuckle, not a hehe, not even a subtle burst of air out of my esophagus. Science says before you laugh your brain preps your face muscles but I didn't even feel the slightest twitch. 0/10 this joke is so bad I cannot believe anyone legally allowed you to be creative at all. The amount of brain power you must have put into that joke has the potential to power every house on Earth. Get a personality and learn how to make jokes, read a book. I'm not saying this to be funny I genuinely mean it on how this is just bottom barrel embarrassment at comedy. You've single handedly killed humor and every comedic act on the planet. I'm so disappointed that society has failed as a whole in being able to teach you how to be funny. Honestly if I put in all my power and time to try and make your joke funny it would require Einstein himself to build a device to strap me into so I can be connected to the energy of a billion stars to do it, and even then all that joke would get from people is a subtle scuff. You're lucky I still have the slightest of empathy for you after telling that joke otherwise I would have committed every war crime in the book just to prevent you from attempting any humor ever again. We should put that joke in text books so future generations can be wary of becoming such an absolute comedic failure. Im disappointed, hurt, and outright offended that my precious time has been wasted in my brain understanding that joke. In the time that took I was planning on helping kids who have been orphaned, but because of that you've waisted my time explaining the obscene integrity of your terrible attempt at comedy. Now those kids are suffering without meals and there's nobody to blame but you. I hope you're happy with what you have done and I truly hope you can move on and learn from this piss poor attempt
September 2019

Classic

What happened to this ad? :(
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roleplay with you as your online gf

twitchquotes: I just have seen your stream and wanted to say that I thought you were super adorable. you don鈥檛 know me at all and i know it鈥檚 kinda weird. I just thought maybe it鈥檇 be fun to roleplay with you as your online gf maybe? I know you鈥檙e straight. I鈥檓 a boy that鈥檚 why I was saying roleplay.. this isn鈥檛 a troll. again, I know it鈥檚 really random and weird. I鈥檓 sorry. It would just be a fun online relationship - nothing serious and I could donate to you and your stream and support you and just be here
twitch chat
July 2019

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Think about your actions

twitchquotes: I have noticed that, although this subreddit has 179,776 readers, I am not receiving 179,776 upvotes on my posts. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to click 'upvote'. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to upvote my most recent posts. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
twitch chat
September 2018

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GME $1000 IS NOT A MEME

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January 2021

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Put shoe on head to prove not pre-recorded

twitchquotes: 銉洁技嗪堎勍溹簣嗉斤緣 PUT SHOE ON HEAD TO PROVE NOT PRE-RECORDED 銉洁技嗪堎勍溹簣嗉斤緣
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Pretending I'm Ahri

twitchquotes: Sometimes I like to put 9 towels into my anus and pretend I'm Ahri. Please no coperino and pasra macaroni, thank you! Sorry for bad England, I walk many Egyption miles to come watch.
twitch chat
December 2018

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League of Legends

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