[Copypasta] I, a god-level CoD player, could join the military

Ok. Listen up bud. You’re a kid, and you’re getting cocky. You snuck in a few good quick scopes and got a few points ahead of me, but you have no chance. I am a Call of Duty god. I would be killing terrorists in Iraq if it weren’t for the fact that I would punch the drill sergeant in the face if he even looked at me funny. So don’t get cocky, bud. Or just like my kill/death ratio, you’re going down, kid. As soon as I finish the campaign I’m tracking your IP, hunting you down and beating the crap out of you. You’ve been warned.
February 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Cybrix virus strikes with thin crust of pizza

twitchquotes: Hello my name is Pepperino Connors this will be my 127th day since the CYBRIX virus striked the Capitols of every importante cities of the World with thin crust of pizza. If someone would have warned us about this madness we could have saved the 0.000000001% of the population. Pls copy this madnerinos to warn them of the imninent threat
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Obama Not Bad

░░█▀░░░░░░░░░░░▀▀███████░░░░░ ░░█▌░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▀██████░░░ ░█▌░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░███████▌░░ ░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░████████░░ ▐▌░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▀██████▌░░ ░▌▄███▌░░░░▀████▄░░░░▀████▌░░ ▐▀▀▄█▄░▌░░░▄██▄▄▄▀░░░░████▄▄░ ▐░▀░░═▐░░░░░░══░░▀░░░░▐▀░▄▀▌▌ ▐░░░░░▌░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▀░▀░░▌▌ ▐░░░▄▀░░░▀░▌░░░░░░░░░░░░▌█░▌▌ ░▌░░▀▀▄▄▀▀▄▌▌░░░░░░░░░░▐░▀▐▐░ ░▌░░▌░▄▄▄▄░░░▌░░░░░░░░▐░░▀▐░░ ░█░▐▄██████▄░▐░░░░░░░░█▀▄▄▀░░ ░▐░▌▌░░░░░░▀▀▄▐░░░░░░█▌░░░░░░ ░░█░░▄▀▀▀▀▄░▄═╝▄░░░▄▀░▌░░░░░░ ░░░▌▐░░░░░░▌░▀▀░░▄▀░░▐░░░░░░░ ░░░▀▄░░░░░░░░░▄▀▀░░░░█░░░░░░░ ░░░▄█▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▀▀░░░░░░░▌▌░░░░░░ ░░▄▀▌▀▌░░░░░░░░░░░░░▄▀▀▄░░░░░ ▄▀░░▌░▀▄░░░░░░░░░░▄▀░░▌░▀▄░░░ ░░░░▌█▄▄▀▄░░░░░░▄▀░░░░▌░░░▌▄▄ ░░░▄▐██████▄▄░▄▀░░▄▄▄▄▌░░░░▄░ ░░▄▌████████▄▄▄███████▌░░░░░▄ ░▄▀░██████████████████▌▀▄░░░░ ▀░░░█████▀▀░░░▀███████░░░▀▄░░ ░░░░▐█▀░░░▐░░░░░▀████▌░░░░▀▄░ ░░░░░░▌░░░▐░░░░▐░░▀▀█░░░░░░░▀ ░░░░░░▐░░░░▌░░░▐░░░░░▌░░░░░░░
July 2015

Sonic Inflation

Today I learned that in 2003 the fast food company “Sonic” began printing out their own money to pay their workers. This led to a huge inflation in the economy and was one of the leading factors of the 2008-2009 recession. Would highly recommend looking up Sonic Inflation on google if you want to learn more.
April 2021

You ACTUALLY consider yourself to be a TRUE hip hop fan?!

You ACTUALLY consider yourself to be a TRUE hip hop fan?!? HA! Let me guess, you listen to basic trap trash like Lil Baby, Gunna, Trippie Redd, DaBaby, Roddy Rich, Young Thug, Travis Scott, A$AP Rocky, Kanye West, Lil Uzi Vert, and Playboi Carti. I would never touch that garbage. You see, I listen to REAL HIP HOP: BROCKHAMPTON, Denzel Curry, and Tyler, the Creator. You really think those artists would ever take influence let alone ever listen to those GARBAGE artists?!?!?!?!? NEVER.
January 2022

Mirana

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣤⠠⠤⣤⡤⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣴⡲⠶⣺⡋⠋⠁⠄⠄⠙⠢⡀⠘⠱⠱⡄⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⠔⠋⠄⠄⣴⣿⡣⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠂⠄⠁⠹⡏⢢⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⡔⠁⠄⠄⠄⣼⠿⢿⣻⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⠃⠄⠢⡀⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢀⠌⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠻⠖⢟⠕⣪⣤⣴⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢳⣿⣶ ⠄⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⣼⣿⣷⠻⡃⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⢹⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠛⠻⣿⣿⡽⠋⠉⢉⣍⣽⣿⣿⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⠶⢼⣿ ⣮⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⠈⣿⣿⣷⡠⠄⣶⣦⣽⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡾⠡⢿⢨⣿ ⣿⣧⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠄⠄⠄⡀⠄⠄⡞⠄⣿ ⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⠄⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⠄⠐⡶⠄⠁⠄⠸ ⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠙⢿⣇⠙⣋⣭⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⢹⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⡀⠉⠄⠧⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⢸⣿⣄⠄⠐⠒⠛⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠁⠄⠄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⠈⢿⣿⣇⠄⠐⢻⣿⣿⡿⠟⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⠈⣿⠋⠄⠄⠈⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣀⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
February 2021

Dota 2

Text-to-Speech Playing