Ok. Listen up bud. You’re a kid, and you’re getting cocky. You snuck in a few good quick scopes and got a few points ahead of me, but you have no chance. I am a Call of Duty god. I would be killing terrorists in Iraq if it weren’t for the fact that I would punch the drill sergeant in the face if he even looked at me funny. So don’t get cocky, bud. Or just like my kill/death ratio, you’re going down, kid. As soon as I finish the campaign I’m tracking your IP, hunting you down and beating the crap out of you. You’ve been warned.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Warrior vs warrior
twitchquotes:
HEH, GREETINGS 
ARMOR UP ARMOR UP I can take the hit Welcome to the grand tournament TANK UP TANK UP I'M OUT OF CARDS
ARMOR UP ARMOR UP I can take the hit Welcome to the grand tournament TANK UP TANK UP I'M OUT OF CARDS
twitch chat
Reynad
Hearthstone
Endgame spoilers
twitchquotes:
I just saw endgame, and it was pretty good, but there were a few weird things. I thought it was strange how the Russo Brothers decided to render Thanos’ erect penis in such vivid detail. The veins were so perfectly done I couldn’t even tell his cock wasn’t real. Another thing I found weird was when Black Panther broke the fourth wall and gave the audience the n-word pass. I did appreciate it, but it would feel more in place in a Deadpool movie. Overall, it was still excellent, but I think that they definitely need to reconsider some things.
twitch chat
I hope your arena wins soar as high as I'm going to be
twitchquotes:
Key Kripp! I'm Rob! I just purchased a fresh, legal dimebag from a Colorado dealer and intend to celebrate. I hope your arena wins soar as high as I'm going to be during the stream
twitch chat
Kripp
My husband said I have "boy pussy."
My husband said I have "boy pussy."
I am a biological woman and a female. I haven't spoken to him since.
For context we were having sex, and at some point with his eyes closed he moaned "yeah that boy pussy..." and then stopped, realising he spoke out loud.
I'd feel better if he mentioned another woman because we're (somewhat) open but I'm pretty sure he's bisexual and instead of speaking to me about it, fantasizes about me being a twink.
Toast the rarity of your reveal card was nerfed
twitchquotes:
Toast, this is Blizzard employee. The rarity of your reveal card was just nerfed to common. To get a rare card, please mention the new expansion at least 4 more times.
twitch chat
DisguisedToast