[Copypasta] I, a god-level CoD player, could join the military

Ok. Listen up bud. You’re a kid, and you’re getting cocky. You snuck in a few good quick scopes and got a few points ahead of me, but you have no chance. I am a Call of Duty god. I would be killing terrorists in Iraq if it weren’t for the fact that I would punch the drill sergeant in the face if he even looked at me funny. So don’t get cocky, bud. Or just like my kill/death ratio, you’re going down, kid. As soon as I finish the campaign I’m tracking your IP, hunting you down and beating the crap out of you. You’ve been warned.
February 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Kripp's gotta hit up the bathroom

twitchquotes: "Give me a second, guys," Kripp says. "Gotta hit up the bathroom" He turns down the volume on his microphone, and immediately gives Dex a swift kick down the stairs. As Dex yelps loudly in pain, Kripp overturns the nearest chair, yelling "Fuck this game!" as loudly as he can. Rania tries to calm him down, but Kripp swiftly bodyslams her onto a glass coffee table. After taking a few deep breaths, Kripp wipes the blood off of his face, sits back down at his computer, and resumes his stream.
twitch chat
January 2018
Kripp

Classic

AYAYA 2

⡿⠋⠄⣀⣀⣤⣴⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣌⠻⣿⣿ ⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠹⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠹ ⣿⣿⡟⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣮⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆ ⡟⢻⡇⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣣⠄⡀⢬⣭⣻⣷⡌⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠃⣸⡀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠈⣆⢹⣿⣿⣿⡈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⢻⡇⠄⢛⣛⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠹⣿⣆⠸⣆⠙⠛⠛⠃⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠸⣡⠄⡈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠁⣠⣉⣤⣴⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⡇⢸⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⡄⢿⣆⠰⡘⢿⣿⠿⢛⣉⣥⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣻⠟⣉⣤⣶⣶⣾⣿⡄⣿⡿⢸ ⠄⢰⠸⣿⠄⢳⣠⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢻⡇⢸ ⢷⡈⢣⣡⣶⠿⠟⠛⠓⣚⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⢸⠇⠘ ⡀⣌⠄⠻⣧⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠛⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠘⠄⠄ ⣷⡘⣷⡀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡋⢀⣠⣤⣶⣶⣾⡆⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣷⡘⣿⡀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡿⠟⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⡄⢀ ⣿⣿⣷⡈⢷⡀⠙⠛⠻⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠷⠾⠿⠟⣛⣋⣥⣶⣄⠄⢀⣄⠹⣦⢹⣿
July 2019

Weebs

Avoid embarrasing incidents

twitchquotes: Hey chat, take it easy please. Sometimes I see the same message posted twice. Take your time to actually read chat to avoid embarrassing incidents like this. Thank you. :)
twitch chat
December 2018

Classic

This is your long lost brother, Jokerc

twitchquotes: Hello Jokerd, this is your long lost brother, Jokerc. I have missed you so much, I hope you don't mind that I played your mage while you were sleeping? Also I told method that we shared the account lmao!
twitch chat
August 2019
JokerdTV

👅HAPPY NEW YEARS SLUTS 🍆

👯hey SlutS! 👯💅 Now that we got our yearly 🎁 FUCK 👊🏼from good ole Saint DICK 🎅🏾 it’s FINALLY New Years Eve!!!🗓🍾👅 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣0️⃣ was a LONGG 🍆🍆 and HARD 😉✊🏻😫 year.... we laughed😂😆👌🏼 We cried 😢😖👎 We coughed 💦🤒🤧 we fucked GOOD👍🏻 dick🍆 and 😵😵BAD 😔 dick, 😫 BUTT 🍑 now let’s 👏👏Celebrate 🙌🎉 and watch that 💦🍆BIG 👅 BALL 😎👌🏼 Drop 👄👄 on us! 💃💃 So spread 👐🏽 those 👐🏽 legs 👐🏽 and count down ⬇️ from 🔟 until your man 💪🏾 pops 🎉 his CORK 🍾🍾 into that thirsty 👅thirsty 👅 hole! 🥰🥰 Send this to 2️⃣1️⃣ COCK-BEGGING ✊🏻🍆 WHORES to get BUTTFUCKED 🍑😱 for the next 3️⃣6️⃣5️⃣ days 😍😍😍
August 2021

Emoji Pasta

New Years

Holiday Emoji

NSFW

Holiday

Text-to-Speech Playing