[Copypasta] You have been gifted FREE EMOTIONAL TRAUMA

twitchquotes: ────────────────────────────────── TwitchVotes You have been gifted EMOTIONAL TRAUMA and PERMANENT ANXIETY. Type Sadge to activate──────────────────────────────────
twitch chat
August 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

GME stock and WSB vs short sellers

Let me tell you what happens tomorrow because it's even worse than what happened today. There they are, Melvin Capital. Furiously jerking their 2 inch boomer cocks to their GME short gainz. They are so close, edging themselves with "Oh yeah, the next Blockbuster" and "Yes baby, brick and mortar go bye-bye." They even sit in a circle sucking and jerking each other off, double fisting like they're skiing down Mt. Everest with cocks instead of poles. Out of nowhere, Ryan Cohen steps in with the most massive and vieniest schlong they've ever seen. He starts eating their lunch and muttering about Cheey for games and they can't do anything because their engorged penises are stuck in eachothers mouths and poop chutes. They attempt to ignorr him and try to keep jerking but they accidentally used hand sanitizer instead of lotion. BAM GME starts rising from the ashes and the retards of WSB are lighting the fires. We brought lighters that we borrowed from our wives boyfriend's and they weren't those shitty clear one. We have motherfucking Bics and torches. Melvin is crying and pleading but we are too retarded to understand coherent English. They see giant red dildos on their screens and their buttholes begin to pucker. They dump everything they have at us in an attempt to supress the price but again, we only understand broken english and emojis. We only understand basic visuals and colors. When we see green, we buy. When we see red, we take out another student loan or CC cash advance and we buy more. We are fucking unstoppable. GME skyrockets and they start scrambling to pull dicks out of random orifices, but it's too late. Bears R Fuk. After we are done splooging all over their faces, and becoming their wife's new boyfriends, we throw Melvin and BOA on the chopping block to be liquidated and disposed of. That's what happens tomorrow, and we are gonna turn that shit into a movie.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Peter Griffin Slug

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣖⣿⠿⢿⣿⣶⣶⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⡋⢩⡟⡟⢳⣽⣻⣍⣧⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣯⡯⡄⢦⣳⡶⢞⣿⣵⣽⡏⠋⣽⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠋⠁⠀⠀⠨⠽⣟⠛⠛⣿⣿⣮⠈⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⡠⣠⡀⠘⢾⣽⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠄⠀⠀⢀⢨⣿⣥⣠⣄⣿⣿⡅⠁⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⠶⠺⠳⠄⠀⠀⠀⠰⠈⠭⠝⠊⠿⠅⠁⠐⠀⣧⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⢾⠏⢥⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣈⣟⣳⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡾⣁⠰⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⡆⠐⢨⡷⣄⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠟⠅⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⢠⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡏⢾⡿⣯⣀⢋⡿⡆⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠅⠀⠀⠀⠀⠖⣴⣴⢟⠅⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠢⡀⢻⣿⣃⢽⠇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⡃⡀⠀⠀⠀⣘⠽⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⡀⢠⡄⠀⢀⣼⣿⡜⣿⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⣿⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢒⣆⣔⣲⣶⣶⣤⡴⣟⠛⡋⠖⠪⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣽⡧⡎⣤⠆⢰⢸⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠃⠉⠉⣉⠚⠛⠊⠘⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⢾⡟⣿⣿⡶⣝⣾⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⣼⠏⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣟⢿⣽⣾⣽⡟⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⣮⣞⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⡉⠈⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⢚⢲⣶⣤⣤⣤⣦⣥⡽⠶⡟⡛⠇⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡻⡦⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠈⠀⠀⠀⠦⢘⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣀⡀⠑⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠘⡾⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡴⠻⣷⣤⠄⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⢤⡄⣠⡔⠀⣾⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣤⠞⡯⠀⠈⠁⠙⠇⠀⠰⠶⠿⠷⠿⠟⠛⠛⠷⠾⠿⠿⠿⢾⠻⠯⠁⠀⢰⢹⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣠⣴⣺⠿⢭⡭⠉⠉⠉⢐⡙⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢱⡾⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢠⠾⠋⠹⠍⠛⠱⠛⠿⢿⢶⣴⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⠈⢡⣔⣠⣥⣼⢷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⣿⣦⢬⣭⣾⣧⣓⡀⡤⢈⡙⢣⣝⡳⠞⡃⠀⠀⠀⠀⡴⠀⢀⣶⣴⣦⣥⡀⠐⠟⢟⠛⡛⠛⠿⠻⢛⠛⢛⠭⠈⢌⡼⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠈⠛⠺⠾⠿⠇⠈⠉⠉⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠓⠶⠦⠿⢿⣿⣽⣿⣦⣀⣦⣭⣭⠵⠤⠦⠴⠾⠦⠤⠤⠶⠶⠛⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
May 2022

Family Guy

Kripp is censoring his chat

twitchquotes: TheIlluminati Kripp is censoring his chat. Don't believe me? Look at this: Kripp is a ████. Kripp is ███████ out to g2a. Kripp is a blizzard █████ TheIlluminati SPREAD THE TRUTH TheIlluminati
twitch chat
February 2017
Kripp

🗿 is the worst emoji

🗿 is the worst emoji. It's horrendous and ugly. I hate it. The point of emojis is to show emotions, but what emotion does this show? Do you just wake up in the morning and think "wow, I really feel like a massive fucking stone today"? It's useless. I hate it. It just provokes a deep rooted anger within me whenever I see it. I want to drive on over to the fucking emoji headquarters and kill it. If this was the emoji movie I'd push it off a fucking cliff. People just comment 🗿 as if it's funny. It's not. 🗿 deserves to die. He deserves to have his smug little stone face smashed in with a hammer. Oh wow, it's a stone head, how fucking hilarious, I'll use it in every comment I post. NO. STOP IT. It deserves to burn in hell. Why is it so goddamn smug. You're a fucking stone, you have no life goals, you will never accomplish anything in life apart from pissing me off. When you die noone will mourn. I hope you die.
April 2021

The tragedy of United Airlines the Overbooked

twitchquotes: Did you ever hear the tragedy of United Airlines the Overbooked? I thought not. It’s not a story the CEO would tell you. It’s a sky legend. United Airlines was an Airline of the sky, so powerful and so overbooked he could use Force to influence the passengers to give up their seats… He had such a knowledge of the police that he could even keep the employees he cared about from not having a seat. The police's use of Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his seat, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice KO'd him and took his seat. Ironic. He could save others from losing their seats, but not himself.
twitch chat
April 2017

Tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise

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