[Copypasta] Born to be a Twitch channel mod

twitchquotes: You can say that I was born to be a Twitch channel mod. I catch a glimpse of copypasta, the adrenaline starts pumping. A whiff of drama, I snap into duty. My streamer calls for a chat ban, I erase that motherfucker from the history books of this channel. There is no !command I won’t code, no timeout I won’t give, no Twitch laws I won’t overlook, and no order I won’t obey to make my streamer happy. And if you become his problem, well, I’m sorry to say that I’ll become yours.
twitch chat
December 2019

MODS

Classic

I used to be a real ad
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Harambe I'm coming

twitchquotes: FeelsGoodMan 🔫 HARAMBE I'M COMING FeelsGoodMan 🔫
twitch chat
August 2016

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Harambe

This is probably the worst thing I've ever seen

This is probably the worst thing I've ever seen. 100 years from now when I'm dying on a hospital bed and I'm asked what my biggest regret was it will be that I turned on my internet and scrolled through the internet on that fateful day... I will never be able to recover from this. No amount of therapy will save me. No amount of prescription pills will let me recover. I am a shell. This memory is so bad my brain is physically rejecting it and now I have a headache every time I think about it. Why did you post this, thinking it was a good idea? You've permanently ruined my life because of this, I hope you're happy. I hope that one day this gets branded as a war crime and you get hauled off to prison, never to see the light of day again. The fact that you're already not in a psych ward for insanity is so baffling I have lost all faith in every kind of justice system. If you subscribe to any religion, you'd best spend the rest of your time atoning for this ultimate sin. Have a terrible day, I hope this creation of yours haunts you in your dreams.
January 2021

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Hello my friend, this is a moderator of PornHub

twitchquotes: Hello my friend, this is a moderator of PornHub™. We have noticed you haven't logged in for 4 weeks, we're just checking to see that everything is okay with our biggest fan. Since you visited us last time we've updated the Gay section with many videos we know you will enjoy. See you soon
twitch chat
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KappaPride

My laptop gets hot when chat is spammed

twitchquotes: Guys can you please not spam the chat. My mom bought me this new laptop and it gets really hot when the chat is being spamed. Now my leg is starting to hurt because it is getting so hot. Please, if you don't want me to get burned, then dont spam the chat
twitch chat
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Only the chosen one can stack these cans!

twitchquotes: DrinkPurple Only the chosen one can stack these cans! PogChamp DrinkPurple but wait PogChamp can you do three cans! PogChamp PogChamp !! DrinkPurple
twitch chat
August 2016

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Text-to-Speech Playing