[Copypasta] Bad at video games. Get good.

twitchquotes: Hello Streamer. I would like to tell you a story. I am a 44 year old women from Colombia. My babby is 14 yaer old and has ligma so he cannot play vidya games. Everi day he must roll his wheelchair to school where he is bullied because of his condition. When he comes home he has no friends to play with, so the only thing he can do is to watch your stream. Because at least then he will feel good about his life since you are so fucking bad at video games. Fucking loser. Get good.
twitch chat
August 2019
I used to be a real ad
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You need a high IQ to understand Rick and Morty

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Rick and Morty. The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Rick's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation - his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realize that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Rick and Morty truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in Rick's existencial catchphrase "Wubba Lubba Dub Dub," which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Dan Harmon's genius unfolds itself on their television screens. What fools... how I pity them. 😂 And yes by the way, I DO have a Rick and Morty tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.
September 2017

Rick and Morty

Classic

Just hit gold and I feel really dangerous IRL

twitchquotes: Last night I hit Gold rank in League of Legends, Summoner's Rift for the first time. Today, when I went on my walk to my standard retail job, idk I felt like I had this new edge to me that wasn't there before. I went from a triangle to a square pretty much. Have any other LoL overachievers ever felt this way before? It's like my rank is strapped to my waist and now whenever people are at risk of passing me on the sidewalk, they skirt over to the other side in a tizzy. At work, someone tried to shoplift some Almond Joy. When I caught him, I yelled "hey!" And he looked at me and scoffed, like, "whatever dude, don't be a hero." I put a hand on my hip and said "I'm not a hero, I'm a jungler." He dropped the candy bar and ran to his getaway vehicle. I recorded the plate and called the police.
twitch chat
January 2020

League of Legends

BALDING not MALDING

twitchquotes: Look at all of these non-intellectuals in chat. They struggle so hard to spell simple words such as "bald". They always type "mald" in chat instead. The pure stupidity in chat makes me lose hair in a way in which my hairline recedes aka "BALDING" not "MALDING".
twitch chat
July 2019

Tyler1 breaks the rules

twitchquotes: Tyler1 isn't so great? Are you kidding me? When was the last time you saw a player with such an ability and movement with Draven? Tyler puts the game in another level, and we will be blessed if we ever see a player with his skill and passion for the game again. Faker breaks records. Bjergsen breaks records. Tyler fking 1 breaks the rules. You can keep your statistics. I prefer to be ALPHA. BigBrother
twitch chat
December 2016

League of Legends

REVERSE BIG BANG

twitchquotes: ୧༼ಠ益ಠ༽୨ UNFOLLOW UNSUB UNDONATE UNBORN FORMAT:C DELETE SYSTEM32 CRAWL BACK INTO MOTHER REVERSE BIG BANG ୧༼ಠ益ಠ༽୨
twitch chat
January 2015
Forsen

୧༼ಠ益ಠ༽୨ riot ୧༼ಠ益ಠ༽୨

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