[Copypasta] Meet the Engineer TF2

twitchquotes: Hey look buddy, I'm an engineer. That means I solve problems, not problems like "What is beauty?" Because that would fall within the purview of your conundrums of philosophy. I solve practical problems, for instance: how am I going to stop some mean mother Hubbard from tearing me a structurally superfluous be-hind? The answer, use a gun, and if that don't work... Use more gun. Take for instance this heavy caliber tripod mounted lil' old number designed by me, built by me, and you best hope... Not pointed at you.
twitch chat
June 2019
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Being a hentai actress must be so weird

Being a hentai actress must be so weird. Imagine this: you’re in a soundproof room pleasurably screaming into an 800,000¥ microphone about how much you love old man dick at 10:47 AM on a Tuesday in October while your 45-year-old boss oversees you through a glass window from the other room. You eventually look up after 2 hours of practicing your unnaturally high-pitched moans and see him give you a big thumbs up as you pretend to have an orgasm.
May 2021

Weebs

I'm just a memer

twitchquotes: ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ、ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ FeelsBadMan ☂ just a memer ヽ｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ｀、ヽヽ｀ヽ、ヽヽ
twitch chat
June 2016
Forsen

Classic

xqcRage

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢲⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⡀⢀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢀⠊⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠂⠸⣿⠿⠛⠻⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢡⣤⣤⠀⠀⢀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠋⠉⠁⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠒⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⠐⠒⠚⠛⠛⠻⠇⠀⠀ ⣉⣁⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠇⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣤⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣷⣶⡀⠀⢀⣤⢤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣴⣶⣾⣿⣿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⢤⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠟⠂⠀⠒⠻⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠙⡉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠤⠤⠤⣤⣀⣀⣀⠀⠉⠙⠛⢿⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢉⣿⢶⣤⣀⣠⣤⣤⣤⣶⣶⣿⣿⣶⣶⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣶⣶⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢀⠀⠸⠧⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⢀⠀⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣈⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⠘⠛⠋⣩⣭⣬⣠⣬⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⡀⢠⣦⣤⣄⣀⢀⣠⣤⡀⡴⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
ascii art
December 2020
xQcOW

The waiter says "Say When", grating the parmesan cheese over my pizza

The waiter says "Say When", grating the parmesan cheese over my pizza. Foolish mistake. Anyone should know that there is no "when". As parmesan fills the restaurant, the pizza only gets better. After only an hour, the restaurants interior its completely filled with parmesan, killing twenty. But the resuraunt is only the beginning. Next the USA will be taken by parmesan, a force stronger than anyone could have anticipated. After that comes the world. Consider this a warning, to get to a foreign planet immediately. At least that will provide temporary safety, until the parmesan rises to mars. At that point, there will be enough cheese on my pizza, and I will be ready to eat.
August 2021

Ben Brode and Firelands Portal

twitchquotes: Ben Brode here! We are happy to announce we have finally solved an issue that has plagued Hearthstone since beta. Despite our best efforts with cards like Flamecannon and Ethereal Conjurer, Mage was still able to lose games in Arena. With the Old Gods we introduced Faceless Summoner, and yet mage's average arena winrate was still only 75%. With the introduction of Firelands Portal, we hope to finally make Mage a viable arena class. 4Head
twitch chat
August 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

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