[Copypasta] Wanna buy some dongers?

twitchquotes: ༼ຈل͜├┬┴┬┴ Psst… Moderator, you wanna buy some dongers?
twitch chat
January 2019
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

SAVE THE INTERNET

twitchquotes: "SAVE THE INTERNET" refers to the imminent removal of net neutrality, which requires Internet Service Providers (ISPs) to treat the provision of internet service as a UTILITY not a LUXURY, thereby requiring them to provide it FAIRLY to EVERYONE, and not just people/businesses who pay premiums to receive the same service as before. It also restricts them from unfairly throttling speeds and access to specific websites. If net neutrality is abolished, Twitch will be inaccessible to most Americans.
twitch chat
July 2017

Hank from Breaking Bad

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⢄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠖⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠋⠳⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠙⢦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⡿⢁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠸⣷⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⡧⢕⠂⠀⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠀⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⠏⠃⠈⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠈⠀⠀⠀⠐⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣴⣶⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⣴⣴⣄⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⠌⣻⣦⣤⡀⢀⣤⡠⢔⡀⢀⣀⣉⢻⢿⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⠋⡟⠙⠛⠚⠘⠋⢉⠁⠈⠙⠋⠃⠿⠟⠛⠩⠹⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⡎⡐⠙⠓⠚⠉⠠⣾⡆⠀⢰⠀⠒⠒⠒⠂⡀⢺⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⡁⠀⠀⠀⡤⠔⡎⠂⠀⠈⡖⣀⡀⠀⠀⠨⠄⢿⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣷⣿⣧⣠⡖⠁⠀⣿⣧⣀⣀⣠⣷⠀⠉⢦⣤⣤⣷⡗⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣸⠉⠛⢿⣶⣄⡨⠻⢿⣿⣿⣅⣄⣶⣾⠿⠛⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣦⠀⠀⠈⠻⢍⠙⠉⠋⠋⠉⡿⠋⠀⠀⣼⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠞⣦⠀⢬⢧⣄⣀⡁⠉⣀⣠⡽⠁⠀⡼⠅⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣧⣄⡉⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠋⠀⢠⣼⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣷⡄⠈⠀⠀⢀⢀⣤⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠻⠶⠼⠟⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣤⣶⣶⣶⣦⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⡱⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠟⠛⠁⠄⠂⠀⠓⠋⢟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⠜⢖⣁⣀⣀⡀⠀⢀⣐⢠⣴⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣷⣛⠿⠻⠉⠯⣉⠠⠹⠚⠺⠿⢿⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢐⣿⣿⡿⡿⣿⣷⠆⠀⠐⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣼⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡶⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⡟⠻⣋⢉⣉⠁⣀⢀⣄⣠⣄⡀⠀⣉⣉⣙⠻⢻⣿⣿⡷⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣾⡏⠑⠓⠉⢉⣾⣿⣿⣿⣯⠑⠚⠓⢛⣾⣼⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⡿⠻⠠⢤⣔⣼⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣲⣄⠀⠘⠻⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣧⠀⣀⠟⠃⠡⣿⠿⠞⠽⣿⠈⠛⣶⣀⣇⣿⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣾⣯⠃⢠⣴⣦⠀⠀⣠⣴⣦⡀⠘⣿⡷⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣾⡇⢠⡿⡿⠻⠁⢠⠸⠻⢿⢷⠀⢸⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⡇⠊⣠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣶⣦⣤⣀⠃⣾⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣧⣬⡶⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣦⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⡿⡛⢟⢶⣶⣽⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠿⢶⣴⡿⠟⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
August 2021

Fortnite Creepypasta (DO NOT RESEARCH)

Fortnite.EXE ctepypasta (do not read at 3AM VERY SCARY!!!) So i loaded up fort nite as usal.... but when i get to the lobby... therr is jonsy! He has black eyes and dark smiling mouth.... when i go to item shop... there is only one item... it is called BLOOD and cost 666 v buck. When i click on it... hyper relistic blood appeared on my screen!!! Then ramirez jumpscared me and fotnite crashed and deleted itself.... I havent dared to open game after that...
December 2020

Fortnite

Buzz Lightyear action figure stuck in my ass

I currently have a Buzz Lightyear action figure stuck in my ass. I am male if it matters. I've always been into putting things in my ass I don't know why, I'm not gay or anything I just like how it feels. Well I got drunk last night and decided to play with my ass and I hadn't gone shopping so I was out of carrots and cucumbers so I looked around and I saw my Buzz Lightyear action figure and thought "why not?" I've put action figures up there before because they feel different and it's funny. I grabbed Buzz, lubed him up and put him up against my asshole and started sliding him in. "To infinity and beyond!" I moaned as Buzz entered me. The only problem is that he has those wings that expand and so they popped open nearly splitting me in half and now he's stuck in there and I can't get him out. I know I need to go to the emergency room but honestly I'm scared and ashamed. I've managed to hide it from my wife so far but I think she's getting suspicious and can tell something is wrong. I'm going to try to sneak to the ER later and hopefully get it taken care of without her finding out.
July 2022

Confessions

could you please take post down (Twitter)

Excuse me, not to be disrespectful or rude but could you please take post down. That is my sister who was killed by a metra train. And it this post is very disrespectful. Idk who you are or if you even know her but I need you to take this down please.
April 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing