[Copypasta] Ten reasons why you can't move to Scotland

Tin resins why ye canae move tae Sco'land. Win - We dinnae want ye here Tae - Yer nae hard enough Threh - Ye wouldnae like the wither (and ye wouldne ken hoo tae describ it - dreich, drookit, haar, etc) Fir - Yer a dafty who couldne git intae oor big skels and dinnae ken aboot the Sco'ish Enlightinment Fiv - Yer a big girruls blouse and cannae keep up wi oor drinkin Sex - Yed get snapped in hoff if ye played fitbaw wi us sivvun - Ye coodnae handle the patter It - Wae dinnae wint ye drivin up the hoos prices Nin - Yer pribly a jobbyjabber who likes it it in the backsie Tin - Oor wimmun boke at the sight of ye If somehoo ye dae mit the abuv requirmints then ye can enter but ye must promis to vote fi SNP, the ONLY party that trilly represents Sco'land. Fuck off hame any English cunts.
September 2021
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Copypastas

Unsponsered Art of Conquest stream

twitchquotes: It is the 2018 Oscars and Tom Hanks stands at the podium to announce Best Actor. โ€œBoy,โ€ he says, โ€œwe got a real competition this year! Johnny Depp, Leo DiCaprio, George Clooney, anyone could win!โ€ The world holds its breath to see who will win the most prestigious acting award in the world. โ€œWow!โ€ says Hanks. โ€œI donโ€™t believe it! The winner is Kripparrian in his โ€˜Unsponseredโ€™ Art of Conquest stream!โ€
twitch chat
January 2018
Kripp

sellout

I hope Seraphine wins xD

twitchquotes: I hope Seraphine wins xD. Iโ€™m a Seraphine main and sheโ€™s just so fun!! People get so mad at the constant singing, and her voice is so cute, like when she sings about about being in K/DA! She is so beautiful and sings like a goddess just like Twitch Chat xD
twitch chat
November 2020

League of Legends

Boom PepegaAim

twitchquotes: ๐Ÿ’ฅ ๐Ÿ’ฅ โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € ๐Ÿ’ฅ โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € ๐Ÿ’ฅ โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € ๐Ÿ’ฅ โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € ๐Ÿ’ฅ โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € PepegaAim โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € LULW โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € ๐Ÿ’ฅ โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € ๐Ÿ’ฅ โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € ๐Ÿ’ฅ ๓ €€ ๓ €€ ๓ €€
twitch chat
December 2019

CSGO

My daughter is dating a douche-bag (response to /r/cryptocurrency post)

My daughter is dating a douche-bag I don't know where I messed up, I thought I taught her well on what to look for in a man. The guy just showed up at my house and starting rambling on about how DCAing 30 dollars in 4 months into Safemoon helped him understand finance and geopolitics. I told him he was completely oblivious about being in a ponzi, this only unchained a what I believed to be a cocaine induced speech saying that Safemoon was going to be the next Bitcoin and he was going to moon while buying "lambos" for his friends because he was no "Bitch-ass paperhands". I'm a bank executive, so you can only imagine what a nightmare this is for me. Don't know what the point of this post is, is not like my daughter is going to stop dating that idiot anyways. I'm scared about my daughter's future.
September 2021

Cryptocurrency

Response to someone correcting spelling

whats that? holy shit. holy fucking shit. you fucking genius. did you actually just correct someone's spelling? you fucking madlad. i can't believe i just witnessed one of the greatest achievements in human history right now. i think im gonna cry, im so excited. to be honest, i would suck your dick to reward you for your HUGE contribution to the human race if the line wasnt so long. you know what? fuck it. ill let you fuck my wife. ill pay you to fuck her. only for the slim chance that one of her kids will have a small part of your magnificent iq. ill mortgage my fucking house just so you could have 15 minutes with her, while hoping that your MASSIVE cock won't rip her in half. after that, we should start a religion for you. fuck jesus, the only thing this dick did is resurrect himself. you are entitled to the praise he's getting. we should make you immortal. losing you would mean stopping the human evolution and we would all revert to monkeys, not that we are more than monkeys in your majestic presence. I suggest we go to the UN and tell them to hand over all their authority to you, im sure you can unite all the people of the world just with a single swing of your cock, making the entire population wet in the process. just before that one more thing: can you shut the fuck up? nobody cares about that fucking typo you single chromosomed retarded gnome. I bet you think you are so fucking smart and witty after pointing something that didnt bother anyone. God, you are fucking pretentious, i bet you actually believed all of the text above. Did you think i would let you fuck my wife? She is only 12 you sick paedophile. Im calling the police so you could be tortured for eternity while your remains will be forcibly fed to everybody from your family or anyone even remotely related to you while they are forced to anally fuck a penguin. no, seriously do you think i'm joking? i'll come to your house and fuck your ass with a cactus. not that you would feel it after all the things you already had up there. you're a fucking twat that doesnt contribute to society and you deserve to die slowly.
October 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing