[Copypasta] My IQ is extremely, almost embarrassingly, high

twitchquotes: My IQ is extremely, almost embarrassingly, high. I've never actually taken an IQ test, mind you, but my educated guess is that, if I did, my score would be whatever is the highest possible. No doubt your IQ is lower than mine, but please don't feel stupid or insecure about this, it's not your fault. You're probably just born that way. And you know what? Thank your lucky stars and subpar genetic makeup that you don't have to bear the burden of brilliance like I have to. Being incredibly intelligent is a curse. This is not just one of the many astute observations I have every day, by the way, it is a fact recently confirmed by science.
twitch chat
January 2019
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Donald Trump answers what is 2+2?

Donald Trump answers the question: What is 2+2? "I have to say a lot of people have been asking this question. No, really. A lot of people come up to me and they ask me. They say, "What's 2+2"? And I tell them look, we know what 2+2 is. We've had almost eight years of the worst kind of math you can imagine. Oh my god, I can't believe it. Addition and subtraction of the 1s the 2s and the 3s. Its terrible. Its just terrible. Look, if you want to know what 2+2 is, do you want to know what 2+2 is? I'll tell you. First of all the number 2, by the way I love the number 2. It's probably my favorite number, no it is my favorite number. You know what, it's probably more like the number two but with a lot of zeros behind it. A lot. If I'm being honest, I mean, if I'm being honest. I like a lot of zeros. Except for Marco Rubio, now he's a zero that I don't like. Though, I probably shouldn't say that. He's a nice guy but he's like, "10101000101", on and on, like that. He's like a computer! You know what I mean? He's like a computer. I don't know. I mean, you know. So, we have all these numbers and we can add them and subtract them and add them. TIMES them even. Did you know that? We can times them OR divide them, they don't tell you that, and I'll tell you, no one is better at the order of operations than me. You wouldn't believe it. That I can tell you. So, we're gonna be the best on 2+2, believe me. OK? Alright. Thank you."
October 2016

Donald Trump

You know what's worse than Ajit Pai?

twitchquotes: You know what's worse than Ajit Pai? To access the punchline to this joke, you must purchase the Punchline Package for $14.99
twitch chat
December 2017

Net Neutrality

Complaining about copypastas

twitchquotes: By complaining about copypastas you are just making it worse. Can't you see that? Every time you comment and complain about people posting the same comments each time just adds to the incentive for people who think they are funny to continue. I am willing to bet that this comment will turn into a *** copypasta at this point just because of how "funny" and "ironic" it would be to make a copypasta out of a comment complaining about copypastas.
twitch chat
March 2016

I hate Twitch Chat

Kripp defending Blizzard on Diablo Immortal

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, video game journalist and decent human being here. Looking to get your thoughts on the disgusting response of entitled gamers to the Diablo Immortal reveal. On a scale from Hitler (least evil) to Straight White Male PC Gamer (most evil), how would you characterize those who criticize Blizzard? Hope to hear you are as unbiased as I am, thanks!
twitch chat
November 2018
Kripp

hey guys, ninja sub here, I am hardstuck gold

twitchquotes: hey guys, ninja sub here, I am hardstuck gold and i loveeee fortnite! all the cool kids at my school play it, and i subbed to ninja because he told me to, and he has lots of viewers haHAA
twitch chat
July 2018
Ninja
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