[Copypasta] Two guys are in a boat with three cigarettes

twitchquotes: Two guys are in a boat with three cigarettes. They had no fire, so they threw one of the cigarettes overboard, and the entire boat became a cigarette lighter.
twitch chat
December 2018
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Copypastas

My name is Yoshikage Kira

My name is Yoshikage Kira. I'm 33 years old. My house is in the northeast section of Morioh, where all the villas are, and I am not married. I work as an employee for the Kame Yu department stores, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don't smoke, but I occasionally drink. I'm in bed by 11 PM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, I wake up without any fatigue or stress in the morning. I was told there were no issues at my last check-up. I'm trying to explain that I'm a person who wishes to live a very quiet life. I take care not to trouble myself with any enemies, like winning and losing, that would cause me to lose sleep at night. That is how I deal with society, and I know that is what brings me happiness. Although, if I were to fight I wouldn't lose to anyone.
September 2019

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure

I'm already Tracer

twitchquotes: ❓ Maybe I’ll be Tracer 😛💨🕰️ ❗ I’m already Tracer 🏳️‍🌈👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 ❔ What about Widowmaker 💜🕷️ ❕ I’m already Widowmaker 🕸️ 👌🏿💯I’ll be Bastion 🤖 🚫 N͘͞E͞͠R̷͘F͟ ͞͠BAS̢͞Ţ͢IO̢N͟҉҉ ⚰️ 🤷 You’re right; so, Winston 🐵👍🏿 🍌 I wanna be Winston 🦍 🗡️ I guess I’ll be Genji 🐱‍👤 😏 I’m already Genji 👤 💀 Then I’ll be McCree 🤠👌 🔫 I already chose McCree 🕛☠️ ✋ I have an idea 🙋 ❓ What’s your idea? 🤔 🙌 You should be— 😇🦶 🙅 I’m not gonna be Mercy ‼️✨
twitch chat
November 2018

Emoji Pasta

Overwatch

Greetings Tyler1, I am the CEO of MacDonalds

twitchquotes: Greetings Tyler1, I am the CEO of MacDonalds, Big Mac-yler OpieOP . I am writing to you to see if you would be interested in working with us. We would like to harness the extreme amount of salt from your body and use it in our fries. Please reply ASAP.
twitch chat
May 2016
Tyler1

salty

Top secret highly classified storingo

twitchquotes: My name is Edmond Krune from Australia. I work with the Australian border patrol and we have been receiving multiple immigrants by the name of "imaqtpie". After assembling intelligence from all our data bases we have traced it down to this website. Please make sure to stop immigrating into Australia Mr. imaqtpie. Please do not copy and paste this top secret highly classified storingo dogeringo.
twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie

Kaceytron's Porn Producer

twitchquotes: KACEYTRON, HERE'S YOUR PORN PRODUCER CALLING YOU OUT! I COULDN'T REACH YOU ON PORNHUB OR BRAZZERS, SO I'M CALLING YOU OUT HERE ON THE TWITCH CHAT, HOPE YOU DON'T MIND! WE JUST SCHEDULED A NEW MOVIE CALLED "KING DONGER" YOU'LL BE THE MAIN STAR ALONG WITH BEN D'OVER AND KINKY KONG! COME OVER TOMORROW AT 12PM, WE START PRODUCTION AT THAT HOUR. IF YOU DO WELL, YOU'LL HAVE AN EXTRA. <3 XOXO
twitch chat
June 2014
Kaceytron
Text-to-Speech Playing