twitchquotes:
Two guys are in a boat with three cigarettes. They had no fire, so they threw one of the cigarettes overboard, and the entire boat became a cigarette lighter.
twitch chat
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More Copypastas
Caleb, this is Tom from LA Fitness
twitchquotes:
Caleb, this is Tom from LA Fitness: we want you to know you are forever banned from our facilities. We understand you take your workout seriously, but what you and your "friends" did in the showers had no cardiovascular value. I know you said you were "working each others glutes", but we both know that's a lie. What you did with the curl bar was disgusting, and our staff is STILL trying to scrub lubricant and bodily fluids off the ceiling. We have added a "Caleb Alarm", don't return.
twitch chat
Calebhart42
KappaPride
I’M NOT BEGGING FOR AN ALL ACCESS PASS
twitchquotes:
“I’M NOT BEGGING FOR AN ALL ACCESS PASS. I’M SIMPLY ASKING MULTIPLE STRANGERS MANY TIMES TO SPEND $15 ON ME” 
twitch chat
OverwatchLeague
It can only be described as a Twisting Nether
twitchquotes:
I gasp in horror as Kripp pulls out his "huge gun". It can only be described as a Twisting Nether. He says "I got lethal now ". Then he topdecks Blizzard and frosts my face. I groan as he grabs my package and whispers "No sniperinos on my stream..." Then he continues to Gorehowl me.
twitch chat
Kripp
Hearthstone
Giant Douche
twitchquotes:
If Reynad was a Hearthstone card he'd be a Giant Douche
twitch chat
Reynad
Please give me an All-Access Pass
twitchquotes:
I’m a gamer school girl, so, i need money for my college, which is why i can’t by this All-Access Pass. But i hope someone can give me one of them. It means so much for me
twitch chat
OverwatchLeague