[Copypasta] Magic the Gathering Thought Erasure

twitchquotes: Yesterday, there was a Magic the Gathering tournament at my local hobby shop. My girlfriend decided to tag along and come support me. I ended up doing pretty poorly (1-3), but the hobby shop gave out a consolation prize of a random foiled uncommon card. The card that I received was called "Thought Erasure" and immediately held the card up to my girlfriend and said "AND I CAST THOUGHT ERASURE, BE GONE THOT!" as a joke, but said it pretty loudly. The shop is pretty small and a lot of people caught wind of my act and needless to say my girlfriend was very embarrassed. We're home now and she still hasn't spoken to me. I'm fucked boys.
twitch chat
November 2018
I used to be a real ad
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me preds egg rolls

twitchquotes: last week i was out really late walking through a dark alley and out of nowhere i hear "me preds" then a small asian boy wearing a kakashi cosplay came out of nowhere screaming "me preds" over and over telling me to sell my kogmaws and reksais. The same guy got me again today but this time he was saying something about egg rolls .
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In Twitch Chat they don't say I love you

twitchquotes: In Twitch Chat they don't say "I love you", instead they say "OMEGALUL" which translates to "I watch you to not laugh with you, but at you" and I think that's really beautiful.
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Liberty Mutual Auto Insurance

twitchquotes: 🚶You owned a car 🚗🚗 for 4⏰📅 years⏰👍. You🚶 named it👱 Brad👱. You💑❤💗 loved💕Brad💕😙. And then you🚶⚠ totaled⚠🚧🚗🚙 him🚦. You two 💏💑had been through everything 👬together🎭. 👬2 boyfriends👬, 🔨🔧3 jobs🔫,❌ nothing ❌could replace👱 Brad🍆🍆. Then Liberty Mutual📞📞📞 calls, and you break into your 😊happy😊 💃dance💃💃🍆.
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Kiwi's Father, Pineapple

twitchquotes: Imaqtpie, this is Kiwis father, Pineapple, I must ask you to wake Kiwi up ASAP, otherwise he will be late for kindergarten! Do it preferably with a loud scream. Pls no fruiterino pasterino
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HYDRA SUMMONING SPELL

twitchquotes: THIS IS THE SUMMONING SPELL HandsUp FOR THE HYDRA DEEK OF HELL HandsUp ONE WEEB MUST BE SACRIFICED HandsUp FOR THE HYDRA DEEK TO RISE HandsUp OH MIGHTY HYDRA I SING YOUR SONG HandsUp MAY YOU GROW BIG AND LONG HandsUp
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April 2021
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