[Copypasta] Homo Sapiens

twitchquotes: When I was 12 yrs old, a male friend asked me if I was Homosexual or Heterosexual. I didn't know what either meant, but I did know we were called Homo Sapiens. So I said I was Homosexual. He laughed at me. He then explained the difference and then I said I must be heterosexual because I had sex with his mom.
twitch chat
July 2018
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Day 2 without sports

twitchquotes: Day 2 without sports: Found a young lady sitting on my couch yesterday. Apparently she’s my wife. She seems nice. Apparently we also have 2 kids.
twitch chat
March 2020

Coronavirus

COVID

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⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠋⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠙⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣾⣿⣦⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣶⣶⣾⣷⣶⣆⠸⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⣿ ⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣷⡈⠻⠿⠟⠻⠿⢿⣷⣤⣤⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿ ⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹ ⠁⠀⠀⢀⣤⣤⡘⢿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈ ⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⡇⢸⣿⡁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢈⣉⣉⡁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⡀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠛⢡⣾⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀ ⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣿⣿⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸ ⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⡿⢁⣴⣶⣦⣴⣶⣾⡿⠛⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿ ⣿⣿⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠿⠿⢿⡿⠿⠏⢰⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⠟⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣄⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣠⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
January 2022

The Picture

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, Micheal here. Yes, your highschool boyfriend. I still have our private picture. "The picture". If you dont want this to be posted on internet - send me your cat.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Hafu likes money a lot

twitchquotes: (◕‿◕✿) Hello! My name is Hafu! (◡‿◡✿) My boyfriend just broke up with me! He said he doesn't like looking at my beef curtains and my chest is too flat. (◕‿-) But it's okay! I will sob uncontrollably on stream. My viewers will feel sorry for me and give me lots of money. I like money a lot. (。♥‿♥。)
twitch chat
September 2014
Kripp

I use this chant to summon Sneaky

twitchquotes: ╰( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )つ──☆・゚ My di ck is small, my butthole is leaky, I use this chant to summon Sneaky ╰( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )つ──☆・゚
twitch chat
March 2016
Sneaky
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