[Copypasta] Homo Sapiens

twitchquotes: When I was 12 yrs old, a male friend asked me if I was Homosexual or Heterosexual. I didn't know what either meant, but I did know we were called Homo Sapiens. So I said I was Homosexual. He laughed at me. He then explained the difference and then I said I must be heterosexual because I had sex with his mom.
twitch chat
July 2018
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

SCP logo

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣴⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⡄⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢋⣵⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⣩⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣬⣙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣷⡍⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢹⠃⣠⣾⣿⣿⡿⢋⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠈⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⡙⣿⣿⣿⢦⡀⢣⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⡿⠀⡯⠊⣡⣿⣿⠏⣴⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⣀⣤⣤⠀⣤⣤⡀⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣌⢻⣿⣧⡉⠺⡄⢸⠹⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠃⢷⠀⡠⢺⣿⣿⡏⣰⣿⣿⡟⠁⣠⣾⣿⣿⠿⠀⠿⣿⣿⣷⡄⠘⣿⣿⣿⡄⣿⣿⣯⠢⡀⢸⠀⢹⣿ ⣿⣿⠀⢸⠊⣠⣿⣿⣿⢀⣿⣿⣿⠁⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣹⣿⣿⣦⠈⢺⠀⢸⣿ ⣿⠹⡆⠀⣴⢻⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⠀⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⢿⣿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⡇⢈⣿⣿⣿⠀⣿⣿⣿⠳⡀⢀⡇⢸ ⣿⡀⠹⣸⠉⣿⣿⡿⢋⣠⣿⣿⣿⡀⠸⠟⢋⣀⢠⣾⣿⣷⡀⣀⡙⠻⠁⢸⣿⣿⣿⣈⠻⣿⣿⡄⠹⡜⠀⣸ ⣿⢧⠀⠇⢠⣿⣿⣷⡘⣿⣿⣿⣟⣁⡀⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠀⣠⣉⣿⣿⣿⡿⢠⣿⡿⢧⠀⠁⣰⢿ ⣿⡌⢷⡄⣾⠀⣿⣿⣷⡜⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⠈⠉⠛⠛⠛⠉⢁⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣰⣿⣿⡇⢸⢀⡴⠃⣼ ⣿⣷⣄⠙⢿⠀⣿⢿⣿⣿⣌⠿⠟⡻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠿⠟⣼⣿⡿⢫⠃⢸⠋⢀⣼⣿ ⣿⣿⣟⣶⣄⡀⢸⡀⢻⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣶⣍⣙⠛⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠛⣋⣥⣶⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⠁⣸⢀⣴⣶⣯⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠾⣧⠀⢯⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢫⠃⢠⢷⣛⣉⣽⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⣁⡈⢧⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⣠⢋⣀⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣉⠉⠉⠉⣀⣀⡭⠟⠛⢛⣛⠛⠛⠛⣛⠛⠛⠩⣥⣀⣈⢁⢀⣀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣝⡛⢉⣁⣀⣤⠖⣫⣴⣿⣿⣷⣬⡙⣦⣤⣀⡈⣉⣩⣯⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
January 2021

Kurumx and Soju fanfic

twitchquotes: "THIS GAME IS FUCKIN GARBAGE!" Kurum yelled, voice cracking slightly in exasperation. "What's wrong Huney-Krum?" Soju called out from the kitchen. "I JUST WENT 5TH TO A FUCKIN BOT... and what the hell did you call me, bowl cut?" Kurum responded, still fuming. "Well, you told me if I called you 'My little Krummy Wummy' one more time you were gonna kick my ass..." Soju pouted, his head peeking around the kitchen door frame "Look, if you take a little break, I know where you can still be top 1..
twitch chat
February 2021
k3soju

Teamfight Tactics

Ho Lee Fuk

twitchquotes: Hello, my name is Ho Lee Fuk and i are fromm Chinaland Father say i need become doctor and make her proud but i chose become HS player like Reckful. Father not happy with choice and told commit sudoku but i know i make right choice. Sorry i no speak propeller engrish and pls no coppy pasterino dongerino frappucino cappucino al pacino
twitch chat
March 2014
Reckful

Today I attempted to insert a whole cantaloupe melon

twitchquotes: Today I attempted to insert a whole cantaloupe melon into my anus because the local shops had run out of apricots (I buy a lot). Using about a gallon of butter, breathing techniques and a few hours I managed to finally get it inside. However it was too uncomfortable so I tried to shit it back out.This is where things got confusing because rather than a melon sliding out half a dozen apricots did. Now there is a chance that I just blacked out upon excreting the cantaloupe and it rolled away somewhere and that I happened to have a dozen or so left over apricots lying around my rectum from earlier but I cannot for the life of me find the melon anywhere.I think I may have the power to anally turn melons into apricots. Further experimentation will be required of course (once my rectum has recovered) but if this turns out to be true then I may be able to solve world hunger.
twitch chat
April 2019

Alvin from "Alvin and the Chipmunks" is not a chipmunk

Alvin from "Alvin and the Chipmunks" is not a chipmunk. This is proven by the name "Alvin and the Chipmunks", as you can see, Alvin is separated from the chipmunks, suggesting that Alvin is an entirely different species, making him an "imposter" amongst the others. Also, in "The Chipettes", Brittney has the strongest resemblance to Alvin, so why is it not called "Brittney and the Chipettes". So all that proves that Alvin is not a chipmunk. Not to mention that Alvin wears red, and I'm not sure about you, but that seems awfully sus to me. In the video game "Among us", the color red is was the birth of the obnoxious catchphrase, "red sus", being that the color red in the game is a stereotype that they are the imposter. While that might be unrelated, keep in mind that Alvin wears red too, and he is also the imposter amongst the other chipmunks. So this proves that Alvin is not a chipmunk, or anything like that. Alvin is just a sussy amogus imposter.
October 2021
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing