[Copypasta] My mom took away my Xbox

twitchquotes: My mom took away my Xbox. This is the saddest moment in my life. The most pain and unimaginable suffering I have ever felt before. Have I been a bad boy? Is that why she did what she did? I don’t know. I have so many questions. I also have depression because of lack of Xbox. I can’t play Minecraft. I love Minecraft so so much, it’s my favorite game in the entire world. Why would she take such joy and happiness away from me? Does she think I do bad things on there? If so, she should know that I join good Christian Minecraft servers only. That’s it.... I give up. I can’t fr*cking take another painful second of this anymore. This torture is what has been depressing me for so long. I swear to h**k, I’ll get that Xbox back if it kills me.
twitch chat
December 2018
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Bear King Burry vs TSLA

Bear King Michael Burry in the ring, slappin TSLA with a metal chair. His glass eye open wide with rage as he batters TSLA relentlessly. "The valuation..." crunch "makes...." crunch "NO.... " crunch "SENSE!" he roars with maniacal autistic glee. TSLA struggles for the edge of the ring, but coughs blood as each hit lands, and eventually stops moving. Bear King Burry drops the chair. Bear King Burry turns to the crowd "Was this your champion!? Was TSLA supposed to be your chosen one!?" A child in the crowd turns his face into his mother's side and cries. On the side of the ring WSB can barely move. TSLA was supposed to tag them in, but couldn't make it to the side in time. "Get up TSLA" WSB whimpers hopelessly, a single tear rolling down their cheek. "Get up..." Bear King Burry turns to WSB "Now it is your portfolio's turn. Get in here you little bitch." "Excuse me." Someone replies from behind BKB. "I believe I can give you the fight you want." A robed figure is administering smelling salts to TSLA. The figure puts TSLA on its shoulder and carries TSLA gently out of the ring. "And just who the fuck do you think you are?" BKB rumbles ominously. BKB's fingers squeeze so tightly on the chair that metal bends. "Who am I?" the robed figure inquires. The robed figure stands straight and stretches to their full height. They must be at least 7' tall. The crowd stops crying and watches in stunned silence. "Who am I?" The figure repeats menacingly. The figure turns around to face BKB, ripping off his robe. A gleaming light fills the stadium. Before us stands a Golden deity, rippling with muscle. If there is an ounce of body fat it is currently in hiding, only to make way for seemingly endless coiled golden musculature. The figure looks directly into Bear King Burry's eyes. "I'm Goldman Sachs, and i'm here to kill you."
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Anime girl wink

⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⠛⠁⣴⣿⡿⠿⠧⠹⠿⠘⣿⣿⣿⡇⢸⡻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢹⡇⣿⣿⣿⠄⣞⣯⣷⣾⣿⣿⣧⡹⡆⡀⠉⢹⡌⠐⢿⣿⣿⣿⡞⣿⣿⣿ ⣾⡇⣿⣿⡇⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⢻⣦⡀⠁⢸⡌⠻⣿⣿⣿⡽⣿⣿ ⡇⣿⠹⣿⡇⡟⠛⣉⠁⠉⠉⠻⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⡉⠂⠈⠙⢿⣿⣝⣿ ⠤⢿⡄⠹⣧⣷⣸⡇⠄⠄⠲⢰⣌⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣤⡀⠄⠈⠻⢮ ⠄⢸⣧⠄⢘⢻⣿⡇⢀⣀⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⠄⢀ ⠄⠈⣿⡆⢸⣿⣿⣿⣬⣭⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⠝⠛⠛⠙⢿⡿⠃⠄⢸ ⠄⠄⢿⣿⡀⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⡾⠁⢠⡇⢀ ⠄⠄⢸⣿⡇⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⣫⣻⡟⢀⠄⣿⣷⣾ ⠄⠄⢸⣿⡇⠄⠈⠙⠿⣿⣿⣿⣮⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢠⠊⢀⡇⣿⣿ ⠒⠤⠄⣿⡇⢀⡲⠄⠄⠈⠙⠻⢿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠟⠛⠋⠁⣰⠇⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⣿⡇⢬⡻⡇⡄⠄⠄⠄⡰⢖⠔⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⣼⠏⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⣿⡇⠄⠙⢌⢷⣆⡀⡾⡣⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣼⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⢿⣿⣿
March 2019

Weebs

Salt season pass

twitchquotes: Kripp, this is Don salteroni from Sodium enterprises, we would like to remind you to renew your season pass as soon as possible if you would like to continue receiving daily shipments of table salt, best regards Don salteroni. pls no PJSalt
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

I'm Summit1g, and this is my stream

twitchquotes: I'm Summit1g, and this is my stream. I PUBG here with my man JoshOG. Everything in here has a story and a meme. One thing I've learned after 5 years - you never know WHO is gonna camp at the other side of that bridge.
twitch chat
July 2017
Summt1g

PlayerUnknown's Battlegrounds

YOU THINK THIS SHIT IS A JOKE

twitchquotes: You all think these are copypastas. YOU THINK THIS SHIT IS A JOKE, it is not a fucking joke. I am trying to CON-VER-SATE. You are so socially inept to even do this and I can’t carry you in this like everything else since it takes two to conversate. Pay attention. Think thoughts. Just do anything. I swear I don’t even know how your parent can tolerate you.
twitch chat
June 2020

I hate Twitch Chat

Text-to-Speech Playing