[Copypasta] My mom took away my Xbox

twitchquotes: My mom took away my Xbox. This is the saddest moment in my life. The most pain and unimaginable suffering I have ever felt before. Have I been a bad boy? Is that why she did what she did? I don’t know. I have so many questions. I also have depression because of lack of Xbox. I can’t play Minecraft. I love Minecraft so so much, it’s my favorite game in the entire world. Why would she take such joy and happiness away from me? Does she think I do bad things on there? If so, she should know that I join good Christian Minecraft servers only. That’s it.... I give up. I can’t fr*cking take another painful second of this anymore. This torture is what has been depressing me for so long. I swear to h**k, I’ll get that Xbox back if it kills me.
twitch chat
December 2018
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69 is so funny

twitchquotes: 69 is so funny. Whenever I hear it, I just burst out laughing. I run out into the living room and grab the Tv remote. I start flicking through the channels. “You guys, it’s so funny, you’ll laugh so hard!” I can barely get it out as I’m laughing so hard, banging the table and snickering while I flick through the TV channels. I finally get to The CW, and the number 69 is on the bottom right-hand corner of the screen! My family and friends who were over all stand up in tremendous applause, and my wife and children come back from upstate to be with my comedic genius!
twitch chat
April 2020

monkaShh

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣤⣶⣶⣿⣶⣶⣤⣀⠄⣀⣤⣴⣶⣶⣶⣦⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢀⣤⣿⠡⢟⡿⠿⣛⣛⣛⠿⢿⡆⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣃⣸⣧⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣋⣵⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⡄⣩⣴⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣭⣉⣀⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢀⣿⡟⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢋⣭⣴⣶⣶⣶⣦⣮⡙⠟⢛⣭⣭⣶⣶⣶⣮⣭⣄⠄ ⣴⣸⣿⠑⣛⣿⠟⢩⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⡋⠉⣿⣿⡌⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⡋⠛⣿⣧ ⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣭⣝⡻⠿⣿⣿⣷⣧⣵⠿⢟⡑⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠶⠭⠶⠟⠃ ⣬⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣬⣙⣛⣒⠠⢤⣤⡔⢚⣛⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⣋⣱⣾⣿⣿⣿⣎⡙⢛⣋⣉⣉⣅⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢏⣭⡝⢿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣛⣩⣭⣭⣭⣛⣛⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⡏⣾⣿⡇⢸⣿⡿⠿⢛⣃⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⢾⣿⣯⣭⣍⣛⣛⣛⡻⠶⠶⣮⣭⢡⣿⣿⢇⣭⣵⣶⠾⠿⠋⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⢿⣦⣤⣭⣭⣭⣝⣛⡻⠿⠿⠿⠶⠶⢸⣿⣿⢠⣤⣤⣶⠾⠛⠄⠄ ⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣾⣿⡿⠰⠖⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣭⣕⠒⠲⣭⣭⣝⣛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⢛⣛⣭⠄⣿⡟⢣⣴⣾⠟⢂⣤⡀⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣮⣭⣭⣭⣍⣛⣛⣉⣭⣭⣭⣶⢸⣿⣿⣿⣯⣴⠞⣛⣭⣶⣷⠄
November 2021

Pepe

Marketing Director for Doritos messages Kripp

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʟʟᴏ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘᴀʀɪɴᴏ, ɪ ᴀᴍ ᴍᴀʀᴋᴇᴛɪɴɢ ᴅɪʀᴇᴄᴛᴏʀ ғᴏʀ ᴅᴏʀɪᴛᴏs, ᴄʜᴜᴄᴋ ᴏʀᴡᴇʟʟ ᴘʏʀɪɴᴏ, ᴀᴋᴀ ᴄ.ᴏ. ᴘʏʀɪɴᴏ. sɪɴᴄᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʀᴇ ɴᴏᴡ ᴄᴀsᴜᴀʟ sᴇʟʟᴏᴜᴛ ᴡᴇ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛᴏ sᴘᴏɴsᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ! ᴀʟʟ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴏ ɪs ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴄᴏᴍᴍᴇʀᴄɪᴀʟ ᴡʜᴇʀᴇ ᴀʀᴛᴏsɪs ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴇᴀᴛ ғʀɪᴛᴏ ᴀɴᴅ ʏᴏᴜ sᴀʏ ɴᴏ ғʀɪᴛᴏʀɪɴᴏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴇᴀᴛ ᴅᴏʀɪᴛᴏ.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

forsenWhip

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠛⠛⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⣀⡠⠤⠄⠄⠐⠢⠤⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⣉⠛⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠔⢉⣤⣶⣶⣶⣦⣄⡀⠄⠉⠲⣄⡀⠄⠄⠉⠛⠶⣦⣤⣌⣉⣙ ⣿⣿⣿⣏⣀⡀⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⠐⡄⠙⢢⡀⠄⠢⡐⢨⡉⠛⢿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠛⠛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣌⠳⣔⣝⠶⣄⠈⠲⣭⡓⢶⣿ ⣿⣿⡏⢀⠄⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡹⣿⡷⣌⠳⡀⠄⢻⣷⣿ ⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡈⢿⣿⢷⣌⠂⠄⠻⣿ ⣿⡏⠄⠄⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⢹⣷⡹⣿⣶⣶⣿ ⣿⠁⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠹⣿⣯⢻⣿⣿ ⣏⣀⣁⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠸⣿⣷⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣿⣿⣿ ⢁⣠⣤⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢬⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠘⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⣼⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
November 2021

Kripp drained Greece's entire supply of Oranges

twitchquotes: Kripp, its Stavros the Fruit Seller from the bazaar. I'm sorry to tell you but you've drained Greece's entire supply of Oranges. Because of the rioting on the streets we advise you to hide any OJ supply you might have left. We can now only sell you Olive Juice and the odd jar of Tzatziki. Please no gyro ouzo
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp
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