[Copypasta] DONALD TRUMP NUDES

twitchquotes: IF πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ YOU πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ SEE πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ A LINK πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ THAT πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ SAYS πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ DONALD πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ TRUMP πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ NUDES πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ DON’T πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ CLICK πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ ITS πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ A πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ VIRUS πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ THAT πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ PUTS πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ AMERICAN πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ FLAGS πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ BETWEEN πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ EVERY πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ WORD πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ YOU πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ TYPE
twitch chat
October 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Wife wants to leave me because of an NFT diamond ring

My wife loves new technology and is into cryptocurrency and so I thought it would be thoughtful to buy her a diamond ring as a NFT. I spent about 3 ETH which is like $12000 CAD. So when she got home from work I told her I had a surprise for her. I put a blindfold on my wife and guided her into our room where our computer is set up. Soon as she opened her eyes and saw what it was, she absolutely exploded with rage saying I was an asshole and was only thinking about myself. She then accused me of spending money on stupid thing and said she’s going to go find a boyfriend. I don’t know what to do in this situation. I was only thinking about HER interests and how happy she would be to receive this new technology. Plus the price of her ring will only appreciate. Stupid real diamonds only depreciate. We have now signed up for NFT relationship counselling. I have been seeking relationship advice but everyone says to buy her NFT flowers or NFT chocolates. And when I did that, that was the last straw. Wife sent me divorce papers and I converted it into NFT. I know in the long run when all these NFT’s moon. She will come crawling back.
February 2022

Shrek is love. Shrek is life

I was only nine years old. I loved Shrek so much, I had all the merchandise and movies. I'd pray to Shrek every night before I go to bed, thanking for the life I've been given. "Shrek is love", I would say, "Shrek is life". My dad hears me and calls me a faggot. I knew he was just jealous for my devotion of Shrek. I called him a cunt. He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep. I'm crying now and my face hurts. I lay in bed and it's really cold. A warmth is moving towards me. I feel something touch me. It's Shrek. I'm so happy. He whispers in my ear, "This is my swamp". He grabs me with his powerful ogre hands, and puts me on my hands and knees. I spread my ass-cheeks for Shrek. He penetrates my butthole. It hurts so much, but I do it for Shrek. I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water. I push against his force. I want to please Shrek. He roars a mighty roar, as he fills my butt with his love. My dad walks in. Shrek looks him straight in the eye, and says, "It's all ogre now". Shrek leaves through my window. Shrek is love. Shrek is life.ο»Ώ
February 2021

Shrek

Classic

Young pistachio becomes grand old cashew

twitchquotes: Let me tell you a story. I was once a young pistachio like you. But then I saw the light. I saw the kripp and let the kripp into my life. Now I am a grand old cashew with a pepperoni plantation to boot. Don't make the mistake I once did and deny the kripp. Kripp is love. Kripp is life. Praise the Kripp. Amen.
twitch chat
May 2014
Kripp

My BODY is machine that turns diary products into spicy liquid diarrhea

My πŸ€Έβ€β™‚οΈBODYπŸ‹οΈβ€β™€οΈ is a πŸš‚πŒπ€π‚π‡πˆππ„πŸš‚ that turns πŸ„π’Ήπ’Άπ’Ύπ“‡π“Ž π“…π“‡π‘œπ’Ήπ“Šπ’Έπ“‰π“ˆπŸ₯› into ➑ πŸ”₯β“ˆβ“…β’Ύβ’Έβ“ŽπŸ”₯ πŸ³π“π’Ύπ“†π“Šπ’Ύπ’ΉπŸ’¦ πŸ’©πŸ’©π”»π•€π”Έβ„β„β„π”Όπ”ΈπŸ’ͺπŸ’ͺ
March 2021

Emoji Pasta

The emotion of the topdeck, the salt of the defeat

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp remember you don't play for the gold or for the wins, you play to feel the emotion on the topdick, the PJSalt on the defeat, you live for the BM, because you can be one with your cards, but mostly because at least through the match you're free. plz no linguini
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing