[Copypasta] Six foot antlers

twitchquotes: I bet all you beta f*gs don't wear antlers either. Science has shown that the male deers with the largest antlers attract the most females, so obviously the exact same principle works for human females. When I walk into the club reeking of sweat with six foot antlers strapped to my head, I get the attention of every female in the room. Pretty much ever man too, that's how powerful the effect is.
twitch chat
March 2015
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Artosis the Great

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparian! This is your lord and saviour, Artosis the Great! I have boarded my private jet to Greecerino to meet you and your lovely wiferino Rania. See you soon! Much loverino, please no dan marino gran torino
twitch chat
April 2014
Kripp

Ingesting too much salt can cause casualness

twitchquotes: Studies show that ingesting too much salt can kill healthy bacteria in your digestive track, this can cause side-effects ranging from a weak immune system, acid reflex, and being a casual...
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Lower case is for the lower class

twitchquotes: 鈺班技嗖犑柼矤嗉斤緣 LOWER CASE IS FOR THE LOWER CLASS 鈺班技嗖犑柼矤嗉斤緣
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Can you take it easy with your complaints about Flamestrike?

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp. Can you take it easy with your complaints about Flamestrike? My friend is a developer at Blizzard and he invented Flamestrike. He has been getting spam letters in the mail threatening to "brofist" him. These spammers claim to be "insane" and "crazy" and "have exactly what they need to beat him." I am worried for him, please help. Thanks man.
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

What's that?

twitchquotes: "Octavian," weeps a heartbroken Rania, "we need to talk. I'm not happy anymore. Your frail, vegan body no longer satisfies me. I asked you for a child, and all you gave me was this mangy mutt. Well, I've got news for you. I'm pregnant, and I bet you know who the father is. That's right, it's Tanner from Foot Locker. I'm leaving you, Octavian, you've ruined everything. Do you have anything to say for yourself?" Kripp lifts the headphone off his ear and glances in Rania's direction. "What's that?"
twitch chat
May 2019
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing