[Copypasta] Six foot antlers

twitchquotes: I bet all you beta f*gs don't wear antlers either. Science has shown that the male deers with the largest antlers attract the most females, so obviously the exact same principle works for human females. When I walk into the club reeking of sweat with six foot antlers strapped to my head, I get the attention of every female in the room. Pretty much ever man too, that's how powerful the effect is.
twitch chat
March 2015
Kripp
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Hardcare games like Minesweeper

twitchquotes: Kripp we are all very disappointed in you. Playing games because Blizzard will pay you? What are you? A shill now? Remember when you played hardcore games like Hearthstone, Minesweeper, or Diablo 3? Everything changed when you got a girlfriend. I'm starting to wonder if you even drink OJ anymore.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Trump wakes up chained to the wall

twitchquotes: Trump wakes up chained to the wall of a small room with Kripp standing over him. Orange Juice begins pouring from the walls, quickly filling the space. Trump screams in horror as he struggles to get free. Kripp walks out, shuts the door and sits down to begin his stream, the white wall of the death chamber visible behind him for all his viewers to see
twitch chat
July 2015
Kripp

Kripp's next hoodie color

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, Im excited to think of what the next hoodie color will be. This ones been going strong 20 days in a row now. Maybe we'll go back to the blue one or even the other light grey one that was worn for 30+ days. It's like a game now.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Romanian Salt Baron

twitchquotes: POLICE REPORT - Canadian Mounties have at last apprehended the "Romanian Salt Baron" after suspiciously salty whining was heard outside of a dingy apartment in Toronto. The Salt Baron, a morose, balding gypsy man, was at the time playing a children's card game when Mounties burst through the door. The man attempted to resist by "brofisting" the officials, but his scrawny vegan arms had no effect. The man's wife then assumed her true Succubus form and escaped into the Nether. More at 11.
twitch chat
July 2016
Kripp

Will this pay for singing in mumble

twitchquotes: [̲$̲(̲ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°̲)̲$̲] Leifman will this pay for singing in mumble? [̲$̲(̲ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°̲)̲$̲]
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
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