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If you ever need a man to be the kiwi to your pie...

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʏ ɢɪʀʟ, ɪ ʜᴇᴀʀ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴍᴇᴍᴇs, sᴏ ʜᴏᴡ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴡᴇ ɢᴇᴛ ᴛᴏɢᴇᴛʜᴇʀ ᴀɴᴅ ʀᴀɪsᴇ ᴏᴜʀ ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀs? ɪ'ᴅ ᴘᴇᴘᴘᴇʀᴏɴɪ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴘɪᴢᴢᴇʀᴏɴɪ ᴀɴʏ ᴅᴀʏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ɢᴇᴛ ᴍᴇ sᴛᴀʀᴛᴇᴅ ᴏɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴅɪɢɴɪᴛASS (ʜᴇʜᴇ). ɪғ ʏᴏᴜ ᴇᴠᴇʀ ɴᴇᴇᴅ ᴀ ᴍᴀɴ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴋɪᴡɪ ᴛᴏ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴘɪᴇ, ᴍᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ᴍʏ ғᴇᴅᴏʀᴀ ᴀʀᴇ ʀᴇᴀᴅʏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴡᴀɪᴛɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ɢᴇᴛ ᴅᴏᴡɴ ᴛᴏ sᴏᴍᴇ ᴄʀᴜᴢɪɴ' ᴀɴᴅ ʙʀᴜᴢɪɴ' ᴀɴᴅ ɪ'ᴍ ʀᴀʀɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ғɪʟʟ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴍʏ ɢᴏʟᴅᴇɴ ɢʟᴜᴇ. ᴊᴜsᴛ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ɢᴏ ᴛʜʀᴏᴡɪɴɢ ᴍʏ ʙᴀʀᴏɴ, ᴏʀ ɪ'ʟʟ ʟᴇᴀᴠᴇ ɴᴏᴛʜɪɴɢ ʟᴇғᴛ ᴏғ ʏᴏᴜ ʙᴜᴛ ᴄʀᴜᴍʙᴢ
twitch chat
July 2014
imaqtpie

Lord Voldemort has infiltrated the Dignitas house

twitchquotes: Michael, this is Dumbledore, Lord Voldemort has infiltrated the Dignitas house and killed Scarra. The legend says the one that carrys the mark of the donger on his forehead is destined to stop the dark lord. Please Michael avenge Scarra!
twitch chat
October 2014
imaqtpie
What happened to this ad? :(

WSB Choose your fighter

Choose your fighter Alex Magikarp 🐟 Elon TechnoCuckLord 🤖+🤴 Jeff Divorcedzos 💔 Salmonella 🐔 Nutella 🍫 Bill "HELL Giga GUH is coming" Clownman 🤡 Chamath, "I'm abouta fuck shit up" Papaya 🍈 Ryan Cocken your butthole 🥒💦 👉👌😳 🥒 Z 🥒 U 🥒 C 🥒 C 🥒 Tim 🍎 Bottom 🅱️ENIS Jack Ma MIA 🤷‍♂️ Cathie "A prayer a day keeps the 🐻s' away" or "Jesus, take my buying power" Woods 🙏✝️
March 2021

WallStreetBets

Kniferino to cut off your dongerino

twitchquotes: ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ ᴛʜɪs ɪs ʜᴀғᴜ! ɪ ᴀᴍ ᴄᴏᴍɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ᴇsɢɴ ᴀs ᴡᴇʟʟ, ᴀɴᴅ ɢᴜᴇss ᴡʜᴀᴛ ɪ ᴀᴍ ʙʀɪɴɢɪɴɢ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴍᴇ? ᴀ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ᴋɴɪғᴇʀɪɴᴏ ᴛᴏ ᴄᴜᴛ ᴏғғ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀɪɴᴏ ғᴏʀ ᴄʜᴇᴀᴛɪɴɢ ᴏɴ ᴍᴇ! ɪғ ɪ sᴇᴇ ᴀ sᴜᴄᴄᴜʙᴜs ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ ɪ ᴀᴍ ɢᴏɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ sᴛᴀʀᴛ ᴅᴀᴛɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴜᴍᴘ! ᴅᴏɴᴛ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴍᴇ ᴅᴏ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜ. ᴘʟᴢ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ʙᴀᴄᴋ.
twitch chat
April 2014
Kripp

hablo espaneo

twitchquotes: helo fabby i am hablo espaneo i come from mexican i am liking your curse videos. after i am watching your streaming video i am strong enough to shoot father hablo with crossing bow. learning tumble and fight dragon. i now in jail watching stream with dyrus on big tv. no copy pasterino macachino banerinio spamino. thank u
twitch chat
July 2014
Dyrus
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?

If I only get one message ,I'll make it sweet and sharp

twitchquotes: I only get one message in slow mode huh? well, if i only get one message, i'll make it sweet and sharp. These authoritarian mods will not be tolerated. Hearthstone was based on the premise of the free market, and it has been corrupted by N A Z I mods in chat who are power hungry. Don't ruin the Hearthstone and twitch chat experience. Thanks
twitch chat
November 2014
Trump

People watch reynad just to masturbate

twitchquotes: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Reynad does it bother you that out of 15k viewers, its highly likely that some people watch your stream just to masturbate? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
twitch chat
May 2014
Reynad

Epik skill-capped MEMER LORD

twitchquotes: Yo QT, it's me... Scarra... I know what we said before and I hope we can just put it behind us... We need an Epik skill-capped MEMER LORD to come carry us. Peng Yalang just isn't doing it for us anymore.... FailFish
twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie

I can't stop staring at Sneaky's sexy face

twitchquotes: I woke up this morning ready to play some LoL. I went to the toilet and did my business like every day before making some green tea. I sat at my PC ready to play but then I had the thought: maybe I should check what's on Twitch. That was 8 hours ago and now I can't stop staring at Sneaky's sexy face.
twitch chat
May 2020
Sneaky

All becoming better than Kripp

twitchquotes: When Kripp misplay, I want to show him my knowledge. I Criticize his gaming abilities and call him the noob. all becoming better than kripp
twitch chat
April 2014
Kripp
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?

Albert Einsteinerino

twitchquotes: hello kripp, my name is Albert Einsteinerino, and I've been a huge fan of yours. You've inspired me to quit my physics degree and pursue my dream of playing video games all day asking for donations from people. Thank you for motivating me to go after my dream
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Not enough brofisting

twitchquotes: Dear Mister-I'm-Too-Good-To-Bro-Fist-All-My-Subs, this'll be the last pasta I ever send your ***. It's been six months and still no word - I don't deserve it? I know you got my last two pastas; I wrote the Kappas on 'em perfect. I'm in the chat right now, spamming penises in r9k. Hey Kripp, I drank a fifth of OJ, you dare me to riot?
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Reynad would like Forsen to join Temple Storm

twitchquotes: Hi Foreskin, it's Reynard here. I want you to join my team Temple Storm. You are very salty and we like that. I will play you $500 American, more than a Swede makes in a lifetime. I will also be requiring your salt for my hair.
twitch chat
November 2014
Forsen

Kripp's friend parrot is jealous

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʟʟᴏ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ, ᴛʜɪs ɪs ʏᴏᴜʀ ʙᴇsᴛ ғʀɪᴇɴᴅ ᴘᴀʀʀᴏᴛ. ɪ sᴇᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴏᴛ ɴᴇᴡ ғʀɪᴇɴᴅ ᴄᴀᴛ, ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴍᴀᴋᴇs ᴍʏ ʙᴇᴀᴋ ᴀᴄʜᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ғᴇᴀᴛʜᴇʀ sʜɪᴠᴇʀ. ɪ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ʀᴀɴɪᴀ sᴇxʏ ʙᴇᴅ sᴏᴜɴᴅ ɪғ ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ʜᴏᴍᴇ. ᴘʟᴇᴀsᴇ ɴᴏ ᴘᴀsᴛᴇʀɪɴᴏ ғʟᴀᴘᴘᴇʀɪɴᴏ ғᴇᴀᴛʜᴇʀɪɴᴏ
twitch chat
May 2014
Kripp

Sandown being investigated by the FBI

twitchquotes: ༼▀ل͜▀༽ The FBI is currently investigating a possible DDOS attack against Kripparian. It is believed that Sandown masterminded this attack against Kripparian's stream, in order to steal his viewers and promote his own streaming career. It is estimated that Kripparian has lost tens of millions of dollars in the DDOS attack, which Sandown allegedly had executed. Sandown refused to comment on the event when reporters swarmed his house, but he later released a brief statement denying the allegation. Kripparian spoke out later that night stating that he intends to sue Sandown if it is proven that he did commit this cyber crime. ༼▀ل͜▀༽
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp
I used to be a real ad

Just seen Biden in a hotel

twitchquotes: Just seen Biden in a hotel and I asked how he was feeling about the election. He laughed and winked at me, then grabbed me by the hair and dragged me into a toilet and spat in my mouth while whispering “count every vote” over and over in my ear. Make of that what you will.
twitch chat
November 2020

2020 US Election

Hello Kripp, this is your mother

twitchquotes: Hello kripp. This is your mother, I saw that "brofist" you just gave to one of your subscribers. Don't make me come to Athens and make you give him a better brofist. Haven't I taught you better fisting? Love always, mum
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

My name is Octavius Kripparius Muridius

twitchquotes: My name is Octavius Kripparius Muridius, commander of the PJSalteers of the North, General of the Salty Legions and loyal servant to the TRUE emperor, Saltarrian. Father to a Flamestriked son, husband to a Top decked wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this stream or the next.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

We are Kappa

twitchquotes: WE ARE KAPPA , KAPPA LIVES IN OUR SOUL AND WE WILL PRAY HIM DAY AND NIGHT FOR THE DONGERINOS HEARTHSTONERINOS FROM DUMBLANDIA THANKS FOR HEARD AND SORRY FOR BAD ENGLAND KAPPA
twitch chat
March 2014
Reynad
Waiting for adblock to be disabled

Dubarino

twitchquotes: Wᴇʟʟ Mᴇᴛ ғʀᴏᴍ Dᴜʙᴀɪ, Rᴇʏɴᴀᴅ. Pʟs sᴛᴏᴘ ᴛʜᴇ ୧༼ಠ益ಠ༽୨ ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴄʜᴀᴛᴇʀɪɴᴏ. "୧༼ಠ益ಠ༽୨" ᴍᴇᴀɴs "Yᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴀ ɢᴏᴀᴛ ᴘᴇɴ!s" ɪɴ ᴅᴜʙᴀʀɪɴᴏ.
twitch chat
January 2015
Reynad
Text-to-Speech Playing