[Copypasta] I am Admiral Akbar, commander of the Somalian Piraterinos

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparian. I am Admiral Akbar, commander of the Somalian Piraterinos. We have taken Kaseytron hostage on our ship, the Edwin Van Q***f. Please send money to our friend, Eddy Pasterino, prince of Nigerino. Thank and please no copy pastarino
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Brofist and crofist

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, I am a lawyer and I represent StrifeCro. I notice that your 'brofist' is strikingly similar to StrifeCro's 'crofist'. Given that StrifeCro owns the 'fisting' patent, I request that you immediately cease and desist from 'brofisting' any more subs, or my client will take you to court. Yours sincerely, Eddie Barristerino.
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

Kripp and another language

twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Dear Mr. Morosan, this is Sister Agatha

twitchquotes: Dear Mr. Morosan, this is Sister Agatha from the preschool down the road. Did you and Rania have a child recently? I ask because of all the crying and whining I've heard coming from your house. The only explanation is that there is an immature person in there, and surely that wouldn't be you, a fine emotionally-stable adult! Please come by and I'll give the child a free lesson in manners! Cheers, Agatha.
twitch chat
April 2018
Kripp

Classic

neverlucky

Albert Einsteinerino

twitchquotes: hello kripp, my name is Albert Einsteinerino, and I've been a huge fan of yours. You've inspired me to quit my physics degree and pursue my dream of playing video games all day asking for donations from people. Thank you for motivating me to go after my dream
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

i graduated top of my class from burger king

twitchquotes: you fucking vegan, ill have you know i graduated top of my class from burger king university in burger flipping and have flipped over 9000 burgers in my day you dumb vegan, but you wouldn't know that would you you soy muncher? If you said that to my face I would be flipping patties all over your vegan face and you'd be full of my meat before you even knew what was happening.
twitch chat
September 2017
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing