[Copypasta] I've always wanted to be an octopusserino

twitchquotes: ive always wanted to be an octopusserino but everytime i try to tell someone they make fun of me. well ive had it up to here. today is the day i put my tentacles down. im sick and tired of people telling me what i can and cant be. i will be getting surgery to split my legs like pasterinos so i can have tentacles if you copy and pasterino my story to mock me i swear i will ink all over your face!
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

I cannot get over how much Kripp complains

twitchquotes: I cannot get over how much this guy complains as soon as he doesn't get extremely lucky. He is so incredibly narcissistic that he truly believes nobody else is allowed to do well or draft effective cards. We are all just guests who play in Kripp's world of hearthstone. To suggest that you are better than Kripp must simply mean that you have better RNG. What an arrogant failure of a man
twitch chat
June 2016
Kripp

Classic

Hearthstone

Kripp subscribes to life

twitchquotes: ļ¼©ć€€ļ½•ļ½Žļ½“ļ½•ļ½‚ļ½“ļ½ƒļ½’ļ½‰ļ½‚ļ½…ļ½„ć€€ļ½†ļ½’ļ½ļ½ć€€ļ½Œļ½‰ļ½†ļ½…ć€€ļ½”ļ½ć€€ļ½—ļ½ļ½”ļ½ƒļ½ˆć€€ļ¼«ļ½’ļ½‰ļ½ļ½ļ½ļ½’ļ½‰ļ½ļ½Žļ¼Œć€€ļ½„ļ½…ļ½–ļ½ļ½”ļ½…ļ½„ć€€ļ½ļ½Žļ½„ć€€ļ½“ļ½•ļ½‚ļ½“ļ½ƒļ½’ļ½‰ļ½‚ļ½…ļ½„ć€€ļ½ļ½™ļ½“ļ½…ļ½Œļ½†ć€€ļ½”ļ½ć€€ļ½ˆļ½‰ļ½ļ¼Œć€€ļ½ˆļ½‰ļ½“ć€€ļ½ƒļ½ˆļ½ļ½Žļ½Žļ½…ļ½Œļ¼›ć€€ļ½ˆļ½ļ½—ć€€ļ½ļ½ć€€ļ¼©ć€€ļ½’ļ½…ļ½ļ½ļ½‰ļ½„ļ¼Ÿć€€ļ¼«ļ½’ļ½‰ļ½ļ½ć€€ļ½‚ļ½…ļ½”ļ½’ļ½ļ½™ļ½“ć€€ļ½ļ½…ļ¼Œć€€ļ½“ļ½•ļ½‚ļ½“ļ½ƒļ½’ļ½‰ļ½‚ļ½‰ļ½Žļ½‡ć€€ļ½ˆļ½‰ļ½ļ½“ļ½…ļ½Œļ½†ć€€ļ½”ļ½ć€€ļ¼¬ļ¼©ļ¼¦ļ¼„ļ¼ć€€iā€™ļ½ć€€ļ½“ļ½ļ½’ļ½’ļ½™ć€€ļ¼«ļ½’ļ½‰ļ½ļ½ļ¼Œć€€ļ½‚ļ½•ļ½”ć€€ļ¼“ļ¼Øļ¼©ļ¼³ć€€ļ¼­ļ¼Æļ¼®ļ¼“ļ¼Øć€€ļ½™ļ½ļ½•ć€€ļ½ļ½’ļ½…ļ½Žā€™ļ½”ć€€ļ½‡ļ½…ļ½”ļ½”ļ½‰ļ½Žļ½‡ć€€ļ½™ļ½ļ½•ļ½’ć€€ļ½„ļ½ļ½Žļ½‡ļ½…ļ½’ļ½“ļ¼Œć€€ļ¼µļ¼®ļ¼³ļ¼µļ¼¢ļ¼¢ļ¼„ļ¼¤ļ¼Ž
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Kripp saved my marriage

twitchquotes: I was going through a rough time in my marriage where nothing seemed to arouse me anymore. Things had gone stale between me and my wife in bed and divorce seemed inevitable. But then I discovered Kripp's stream and everything changed. There's just something about that vegan bald head that does something to me, and before I knew it my libido was back. I now go at it with my wife at the sounds of "Fuck!" and "Topdeck Flamestrike!" to boost my vigor. Thank you Kripp for saving my marriage.
twitch chat
November 2019
Kripp

Hearthstone

"Only 200 Gems, are you kidding me?!"

twitchquotes: "Only 200 Gems, are you kidding me?!" screams Kripp at the struggling mobile game dev who's game he is being sponsored to play. "How am I supposed to hit rank 1 without a massive head-start over everyone else!? I have to be able to brag to my chat about being #1 in every game I play!" The developer, scared, gives in to his demands. Business as usual for the Kripp.
twitch chat
November 2018
Kripp

sellout

Kripp please pet your cat

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparian, Leon Tidewellow here, CEO of PETA. My sources tell me that you haven't pet your cat in over 3 years, and thats a little too long. I'll give you 5 minutes, if you don't pet the cat then you WILL be brofisted. Have a nice day!.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing