[Copypasta] I've always wanted to be an octopusserino

twitchquotes: ive always wanted to be an octopusserino but everytime i try to tell someone they make fun of me. well ive had it up to here. today is the day i put my tentacles down. im sick and tired of people telling me what i can and cant be. i will be getting surgery to split my legs like pasterinos so i can have tentacles if you copy and pasterino my story to mock me i swear i will ink all over your face!
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Kripp needs to find a Romanian woman

twitchquotes: KRIPP! This is Papparian, your father! What is this I hear about marrying a Greek woman and making mini kripps with her??!! You need to find yourself a real full bodied Romanian woman, boy. One that can hand squeeze OJ and carry on our bloodline.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Brofist

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–’β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–„β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–„β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–’β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–’β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–’β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆ β–‘β–ˆβ–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–’β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–’β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–ˆ β–„β–€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–‘β–ˆβ–’β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–“β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–‘β–‘β–“β–„β–ˆ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–‘ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–€β–‘β–„β–€β–“β–„β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘ β–ˆβ–’β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–€β–€β–„β–€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–€β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
February 2015
Kripp

Worst Matchup

twitchquotes: Worst Matchup: Warrior βœ“ Shaman βœ“ Priest βœ“ Rogue βœ“ Druid βœ“ Warlock βœ“ Hunter βœ“ Mage βœ“ Paladin βœ“
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp

Kripp drained Greece's entire supply of Oranges

twitchquotes: οΌ«ο½’ο½‰ο½ο½οΌŒ its Stavros ο½”ο½ˆο½… Fruit οΌ³ο½…ο½Œο½Œο½…ο½’ from the bazaar. I'm sorry to ο½”ο½…ο½Œο½Œ you but you've ο½„ο½’ο½ο½‰ο½Žο½…ο½„ Greece's ο½…ο½Žο½”ο½‰ο½’ο½… ο½“ο½•ο½ο½ο½Œο½™ of οΌ―ο½’ο½ο½Žο½‡ο½…ο½“οΌŽ 2ecause of ο½”ο½ˆο½… ο½’ο½‰ο½ο½”ο½‰ο½Žο½‡ on ο½”ο½ˆο½… streets ο½—ο½… advise you to ο½ˆο½‰ο½„ο½… ο½ο½Žο½™ οΌ―οΌͺ ο½“ο½•ο½ο½ο½Œο½™ you ο½ο½‰ο½‡ο½ˆο½” ο½ˆο½ο½–ο½… ο½Œο½…ο½†ο½”οΌŽ οΌ·ο½… ο½ƒο½ο½Ž ο½Žο½ο½— ο½ο½Žο½Œο½™ ο½“ο½…ο½Œο½Œ you οΌ―ο½Œο½‰ο½–ο½… οΌͺuice ο½ο½Žο½„ ο½”ο½ˆο½… odd ο½Šο½ο½’ of οΌ΄ο½šο½ο½”ο½šο½‰ο½‹ο½‰οΌŽ οΌ°ο½Œο½…ο½ο½“ο½… no gyro ο½ο½•ο½šο½
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

This is your father Vyascheslav from Moskva

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparian, this is your father Vyascheslav from Moskva. I have started working overtime at the power plant, and your sister Tatyana has gone to Berlin to sell her body to Kraut swine for money. We do all this to pay for your "Stoned Heart of the Cards" game. Please win tournament and send us rubles soon, so our family can be together again.
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing