Have you ever thought about how, to a horse, the world is basically Candyland? Like they're wandering down a trail and boom, there's just some thistles. And then to the left, a delicious tree. There's just food all over the ground everywhere. Horses seem pretty excited about it.
I used to be a real ad
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Twitch Viewbot Premium Package
twitchquotes:
Hello, thank you for ordering the Twitch Viewbot Premium Package for $550 which will last 2 months and end on 8/13/17. This subscription will have your chat enter life-like messages that are believable and you'll never be suspected! Here are some examples: 
how do you play this game? 
what game is this? Additionally, upgrade for another $50 and earn the message: 
STRIMMER TURN THIS DUMB SHIT OFF
Hello, thank you for ordering the Twitch Viewbot Premium Package for $550 which will last 2 months and end on 8/13/17. This subscription will have your chat enter life-like messages that are believable and you'll never be suspected! Here are some examples: how do you play this game? what game is this? Additionally, upgrade for another $50 and earn the message: STRIMMER TURN THIS DUMB SHIT OFF
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Viewbots
CLG is fantastic
twitchquotes:
CLG is fantastic, just needs to work on communication, map awareness, laning, vision control, csing, poking, landing skillshots, objective control, early game, mid game, late game, ganking, and getting kills.
twitch chat
LCS
League of Legends
This is probably the worst thing I've ever seen
This is probably the worst thing I've ever seen. 100 years from now when I'm dying on a hospital bed and I'm asked what my biggest regret was it will be that I turned on my internet and scrolled through the internet on that fateful day... I will never be able to recover from this. No amount of therapy will save me. No amount of prescription pills will let me recover. I am a shell. This memory is so bad my brain is physically rejecting it and now I have a headache every time I think about it. Why did you post this, thinking it was a good idea? You've permanently ruined my life because of this, I hope you're happy. I hope that one day this gets branded as a war crime and you get hauled off to prison, never to see the light of day again. The fact that you're already not in a psych ward for insanity is so baffling I have lost all faith in every kind of justice system. If you subscribe to any religion, you'd best spend the rest of your time atoning for this ultimate sin. Have a terrible day, I hope this creation of yours haunts you in your dreams.
Classic
Secret Puerto Rican lover
twitchquotes:
Hola, Kripp, this is Antonio, Rania's secret Puerto Rican lover. I mistakenly left a package of my Magnum XXL Heavy-Duty Condoms at your place last night while you were complaining about a children's card game. I was hoping I could swing by tonight and pick them up. I'll just go in through the backdoor just like how I do with Rania, the dirty girl! Thanks, and good luck with your funny little computer game!
twitch chat
Kripp
Classic
Reynad Rick Harrison
twitchquotes:
I'm Reynad and this is my stream. I work here with my nazi mods and my boyfriend, Jeff. Every game on this stream is bullshit RNG and pure salt. One thing I've learned after 4 years - you never know WHAT will trigger me next. 
twitch chat
Reynad