[Copypasta] Wife wants to leave me because of an NFT diamond ring

My wife loves new technology and is into cryptocurrency and so I thought it would be thoughtful to buy her a diamond ring as a NFT. I spent about 3 ETH which is like $12000 CAD. So when she got home from work I told her I had a surprise for her. I put a blindfold on my wife and guided her into our room where our computer is set up. Soon as she opened her eyes and saw what it was, she absolutely exploded with rage saying I was an asshole and was only thinking about myself. She then accused me of spending money on stupid thing and said she’s going to go find a boyfriend. I don’t know what to do in this situation. I was only thinking about HER interests and how happy she would be to receive this new technology. Plus the price of her ring will only appreciate. Stupid real diamonds only depreciate. We have now signed up for NFT relationship counselling. I have been seeking relationship advice but everyone says to buy her NFT flowers or NFT chocolates. And when I did that, that was the last straw. Wife sent me divorce papers and I converted it into NFT. I know in the long run when all these NFT’s moon. She will come crawling back.
February 2022
https://www.reddit.com/r/CryptoCurrency/comments/smpah0/wife_wants_to_leave_me/
What happened to this ad? :(
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are you a "girl"?? A "female?" A "member of the finer sex?"

Excuse me sir or ma'am but I couldn't help but notice.... are you a "girl"?? A "female?" A "member of the finer sex?" Not that it matters too much, but it's just so rare to see a girl around here! I don't mind, no--quite to the contrary! It's so refreshing to see a girl online, to the point where I'm always telling all my friends "I really wish girls were better represented on the internet." And here you are! I don't mean to push or anything, but if you wanted to DM me about anything at all, I'd love to pick your brain and learn all there is to know about you. I'm sure you're an incredibly interesting girl--though I see you as just a person, really--and I think we could have lots to teach each other. I've always wanted the chance to talk to a gorgeous lady--and I'm pretty sure you've got to be gorgeous based on the position of your text in the picture--so feel free to shoot me a message, any time at all! You don't have to be shy about it, because you're beautiful anyways (that's juyst a preview of all the compliments I have in store for our chat). Looking forwards to speaking with you soon, princess! EDIT: I couldn't help but notice you haven't sent your message yet. There's no need to be nervous! I promise I don't bite, haha EDIT 2: In case you couldn't find it, you can click the little chat button from my profile and we can get talking ASAP. Not that I don't think you could find it, but just in case hahah EDIT 3: look I don't understand why you're not even talking to me, is it something I said? EDIT 4: I knew you were always a bitch, but I thought I was wrong. I thought you weren't like all the other girls out there but maybe I was too quick to judge EDIT 5: don't ever contact me again whore EDIT 6: hey are you there?
September 2021

Simps

Please refrain from likening us to plebeians

twitchquotes: Twitch streamers and their subscribers define us (not subscribed audience) as members of a lower social class, plebs as they call it. I find it inappropriate to compare us with ancient Rome's lowest class as there is nothing ignominious to being a member of the proletariat. Also their living standards were significantly inferior to ours (e.g. health, education) so the comparison is unsound. In the future, please refrain from likening us to plebeians because descriminating due to economic and social status like that is reprehensible in our modern society.
twitch chat
November 2018

Classic

plebs vs subs

Here in my garage

twitchquotes: Here in my garage, just bought this new Lamborghini here. It’s fun to drive up here in the Hollywood hills. But you know what I like more than materialistic things? Knowledge. In fact, I’m a lot more proud of these seven new bookshelves that I had to get installed to hold two thousand new books that I bought. It’s like the billionaire Warren Buffett says, “the more you learn, the more you earn.”
twitch chat
August 2018

Zamn She's 12?

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣶⣶⣶⢶⣲⣦⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣶⣿⣿⡿⠿⠾⠿⠿⢿⣿⣶⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣷⠟⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠳⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣼⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠨⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢛⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠺⠏⠀⠀⠀⢁⠀⣀⠉⡣⣤⠤⢤⣶⠔⡋⢉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠄⢃⣄⠀⠀⠐⠁⣀⣘⠽⠁⠀⠸⡗⡁⠛⡽⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠄⠄⠈⣃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢮⠉⠙⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠄⡠⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠎⠐⠦⣀⣀⣤⣴⣆⣤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣶⠏⡆⣿⣄⠀⠀⠀⣾⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠩⢼⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣀⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⠁⠆⢻⣿⣄⡀⢰⡿⣡⣦⣉⣉⠉⢉⣹⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⢀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣟⢿⡏⠏⠈⠉⠉⠉⠘⢸⣳⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⡟⢻⣿⣻⣿⡇⢘⡀⠀⠘⣿⡇⠘⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀ ⣿⡅⢸⣿⡿⣟⣥⠀⢷⣤⣴⣿⣿⣆⠀⠰⡆⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⡇⣸⡥⡇⣿⣿⣷⡈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣶⣀⣀⡠⠈⣱⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣻⡇⣿⣿⡇⣿⢏⣻⣿⣦⡠⠙⠿⢿⣿⣿⠿⠟⣉⣪⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏ ⣿⠃⣿⣿⣿⣿⠉⢿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣤⣤⡰⠷⢶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣇ ⣿⢸⣿⣿⡇⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⠟⠉⡿⣏⠏⠁⢠⣜⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⢧⣿⣿⣿⣛⣚⣒⣀⣧⣿⠀⠀⠘⣧⠾⠶⠶⠶⠾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏ ⣿⣿⡿⡟⠛⠛⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡗ ⣿⣇⣿⠀⠀⣀⡀⠀⣠⠀⢠⡀⣠⠀⣄⠀⣆⠀⣄⡢⠐⣴⠆⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡷ ⣿⣷⢻⠀⠀⣀⠉⢸⠒⢣⢸⠈⠈⡆⠇⠑⠻⠀⠀⢤⣤⠄⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡷ ⣾⣿⢸⠀⠀⠉⠉⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣰⣾⣿⣿⣿⣯⡗ ⣿⣿⣾⣐⢠⣤⣤⠤⠤⠶⠶⣶⣖⣒⣚⣛⣻⣿⣿⣭⣭⣭⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣛⣋⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟
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November 2021
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