A teacher asked the class, "what is SEX?" Johnny got up and said, "Sex is a TEMPTATION which causes a SENSATION when a boy sticks his LOCATION into a girl's DESTINATION which increases the POPULATION for the next GENERATION. Do you get my EXPLANATION? or do you need a DEMONSTRATION?"
The teacher fainted.
What happened to this ad? :(
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If Harambe and my girl both drowning
twitchquotes:
If harambe π and my girl π§ π both drowning π± π and I can only save one π€ π¬ Catch me at my girl funeral π π» πΉ with my dick out π π― π π
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Emoji Pasta
Harambe
SKROINK!
twitchquotes:
[ α€ ΰ² (oo) ΰ² ]α€ οΈ΅β»ββ» SKROINK! [ α€ ΰ² (oo) ΰ² ]α€ οΈ΅β»ββ»
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Kripp
After a good game in csgo, i added him
twitchquotes:
After a good game in csgo, i added him because he seemed like a cool guy. We got chatting, over the next couple of months we became good friends. Lots of banter, lots of great CS and most importantly true friendship. I invited him to my house for a csgo lan party. He said he was coming so i was looking forward to meeting him in real life. When he arrived at my house, he pushed me against the wall and started nibbling my ear. Turns out he was vegan. Don't trust this guy.
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CSGO
Szechuan sauce at McDonald's
"Hey, do you guys have szechuan sauce?", I ask the low IQ minimum wage slave. "N-no, sir. We just ran out", he muttered. I was overcome with a primal rage. I jump on the counter, screaming "I'm Pickle Rick!β. The 200 IQ crowd chanted in unison, βWUBBALUBBA DUB DUBβ whilst beating their chests towards the cowering worker. I put my shirt over my head and let out the purest REEE to show my devotion to Rick. Everyone else REEEs as well. Yes, my brothers, let it all out. The manger comes in and calls the police, he doesnβt understand the mature and intellectual nature of our cries. We Naruto run to the next McDonalds store as we search endlessly for that sauce.
Rick and Morty
Kripp reluctantly crawls into bed
twitchquotes:
Kripp reluctantly crawls into bed where a breathless Hafu is waiting. She takes hold of his hand and whispers, "It's ok, I broke up with Jake." He squeezes her hand, let's go, squeezes again, "You're the best female arena player...," Kripp says dejectedly, "But I made a vow to Rania to never love another woman." Hafu runs her hands lovingly down his cheek, "You're not cheating," she whispers, "I'm really Amaz."
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Kripp