A teacher asked the class, "what is SEX?" Johnny got up and said, "Sex is a TEMPTATION which causes a SENSATION when a boy sticks his LOCATION into a girl's DESTINATION which increases the POPULATION for the next GENERATION. Do you get my EXPLANATION? or do you need a DEMONSTRATION?"
The teacher fainted.
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A reply to 'k'
K? K what? The letter before L? The letter after J? Did you know that in JK the K stands for โkidding?โ So your reply is โkidding?โ or K as in Potassium? Do you need some Special K for breakfast? K as in I can K/O you? Can I knock you out and feed you to hungry sharks? Sharks have a K in it. "K"? Are you fucking kidding me? I spent a decent portion of my life writing all of that and your response to me is "K"? Are you so mentally handicapped that the only letter you can comprehend is "K" - or are you just some fucking asshole who thinks that with such a short response, he can make a statement about how meaningless what was written was? Well, I'll have you know that what I wrote was NOT meaningless, in fact, I even had my written work proof-read by several professors of literature. Don't believe me? I doubt you would, and your response to this will probably be "K" once again. Do I give a fuck? No, does it look like I give even the slightest fuck about a single letter? I bet you took the time to type that one letter too, I bet you sat there and chuckled to yourself for 20 hearty seconds before pressing "send". You're so fucking pathetic. I'm honestly considering directing you to a psychiatrist, but I'm simply far too nice to do something like that. You, however, will go out of your way to make a fool out of someone by responding to a well-thought-out, intelligent, or humorous statement that probably took longer to write than you can last in bed with a chimpanzee. What do I have to say to you? Absolutely nothing. I couldn't be bothered to respond to such a worthless attempt at a response. Do you want "K" on your gravestone? Do you want people to remember you as the asshat who one day decided to respond to someone with a single letter? "Hey, look, everybody! It's that "K" guy!" That's who you are. You're going to be known as the "K" guy. How does it feel? Do you feel happy? Quite honestly, I don't care, which is why I'm not even going to respond to you. Goodbye, and good luck with your future as that guy who said "K".
Silver 5, time for NA LCS!
twitchquotes:
Hey guys. Me and my friends have always dreamed about joining the NA LCS. We created a ranked team, climbed up all the ranks till we got Silver 5. We have finally done it. Time for NA LCS! 
twitch chat
Riot Games
League of Legends
EU vs NA
Natalie Portman is the reason I work out
Natalie Portman is the reason I work out. I have this fantasy where we start talking at the Vanity Fair Oscars party bar. We exchange a few pleasantries. She asks what I do. I say I loved her in New Girl. She laughs. I get my drink.
"Well, see ya," I say and walk away. I've got her attention now. How many guys voluntarily leave a conversation with Natalie Portman? She touches her neck as she watches me leave.
Later, as the night's dragged on and the coterie of gorgeous narcissists grows increasingly loose, she finds me on the balcony, my bowtie undone, smoking a cigarette.
"Got a spare?" she asks.
"What's in it for me?" I say as I hand her one of my little white ladies. She smiles.
"Conversation with me, duh."
I laugh.
"What's so funny?" she protests.
"Nothing, nothing... It's just... don't you grow tired of the egos?"
"You get used to it," she says, lighting her cigarette and handing me back the lighter.
"What would you do if you weren't an actress?" I ask.
"Teaching, I think."
"And if I was your student, what would I be learning?"
"Discipline," she says quickly, looking up into my eyes, before changing the subject. "Where are you from?"
"Bermuda," I say.
"Oh wow. That's lovely."
"It's ok," I admit. "Not everything is to my liking."
"What could possibly be not to your liking in Bermuda?" she inquires.
"I don't like sand," I tell her. "It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere."
Classic
THIS GAME IS AMAZING
THIS GAME IS AMAZING! Time to get ready for big daddy HOE Biden
The results ๐are in and our gurl ๐๐ป sanders is out ๐ณ๏ธโ๐. Time to get ready for big daddy HOE Biden. He's cumming ๐ฆ๐ฆ to DOMINATE๐คผโโ๏ธ our HEAD of state ๐ and his bitch๐๐ปโโ๏ธ mike pence. He may be a donkey but he's big as a horse ๐๐ด and is ready to touch ๐๐คซ๐ the hearts ๐of all Americans ๐บ๐ธ. Cum erection day ๐ณ y'all sluts better fill that hole ๐๐ป๐ next to biden and relaseโ America's aching ๐คคthrobbing ๐ฎ desire for green ๐ค๐คenergy, a ban ๐on those naughty big black guns๐ช๐พ, and more money to pay๐ต๐ฐ๐ธ those slutty nurses ๐ฉโโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ to make us all feel better ๐๐ฅด. Cum ๐ฆ hoevember help the needy ๐
๐ง๐ปโโ๏ธ by supporting big daddy Biden ๐จ๐ปโ๐ฆณand naughty Nancy๐โโ๏ธ๐ and give dirty Donald ๐ฉ, bitch McConnell ๐ข, and those filthy ๐ท๐ reSUBlicans๐ blue balls๐ต. Send to ๐ of your most deviant ๐democrats. If you get 5๏ธโฃback ur a Biden bitch ๐
๐ป๐ต. if u get ๐ u will spend a hot ๐ฅ Decemberโ๏ธnight with those skanks at the ERECToral ๐๐ college ๐.)