[Copypasta] Raid Shadow Legends changed my life

twitchquotes: i used to play fortnite all nite. no sleep! but ever since obama told me to try raid shadow legends for free, i am addicted. this game is a game. it has graphics. it has characters. best of all it has a loot box mechanic to enhance my experience even more by adding another exciting chance based layer to the game! two week ago i spend all my money becoming a raid shadow legend. now i live in a dumpster outside a mcdonalds with free wifi. at night i sneak into the mcdonalds just like my new racoon dad, stripey, taught me to do so that i can charge my phone. through the cracked screen i am still perpetually amazed at the graphics of this game... they look so real! thank you obama, you truly change my life!
twitch chat
January 2020
I used to be a real ad
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I fucked Up DVD

Earlier today I was really horny, and I saw what I thought to be a blank DVD. I thought, DVDs have a tight hole, they might feel pretty good. So I put my soft pp into the hole of the DVD, and for a few seconds as I started getting harder, it felt pretty good, but then, once I was fully erect, it started being painful. My pp was stuck in the DVD, and I had to break it in half to get if out. It was then when I flipped the broken DVD over and realized that it was not a blank DVD, but a copy of the Pixar movie Up.. Well guys, guess I fucked up.
April 2022

Classic

Sonic Inflation

Today I learned that in 2003 the fast food company “Sonic” began printing out their own money to pay their workers. This led to a huge inflation in the economy and was one of the leading factors of the 2008-2009 recession. Would highly recommend looking up Sonic Inflation on google if you want to learn more.
April 2021

Kripp discovered one weird trick to look twice his age

twitchquotes: Kripp is the remarkable twenty year old that discovered one weird trick to look twice his age. It's called being VEGAN and it limits your body’s nutritional intake and makes you look and feel TWICE AS OLD. Why would anyone want to be vegan you may ask, well all vegans hate animals so they eat all the animals food so that they starve to death.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

I know my opinion is irrelevant because I am a pleb

twitchquotes: I know my opinion is irrelevant because I am a pleb, but hear me out. Are us plebs as insignificant as we are made out to be? If there were no plebs, could there be any subs? I know were seen as copypasta bots, but I am a pleb and I am PROUD. SET AN EXAMPLE FOR US, FELLOW PLEBS, DO NOT FUCKING COPY AND PASTE THIS!
twitch chat
January 2015
imaqtpie

plebs vs subs

Reynad's Lawyer

twitchquotes: ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽_•︻̷̿┻̿═━一 Greetings, I am Reynad's new lawyer, Gino Pasterino. It appears you are playing one of my client's decks, which is now under copyright at the US patent offices. Please desist immediately or be subject to monetary fines and penalties. No cappuccino.
twitch chat
June 2014
Kripp
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