Chungus has no beginning. Chungus has no end. Chungus is infinite. Millions of years after our civilization has been eradicated and forgotten, Chungus will endure.
Chungus is eternal. The pinnacle of evolution and existence.
We are but rudimentary creatures of blood and flesh. We touch Chungus' mind, fumbling in ignorance, incapable of understanding.
Organic life is nothing but a genetic mutation, an accident. Our lives are measured in years and decades. We wither and die. Chungus is eternal. Before it, we are nothing.
Chungus imposes order on the chaos of organic life. We exist because Chungus allows it, and we will end because Chungus demands it.
Chungus transcends our very understanding. We cannot grasp the nature of Chungus' existence.
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More Copypastas
Bird with cock
I dream of becoming a carrot
twitchquotes:
I dream of becoming a carrot. When I'm home alone I dig holes in the backyard and stand in them, put lettuce on top of my head from sun up to sun down. I would steal sun tan spray from stores and use it until I turned a bright orange. People tell me it's impossible for me to be a carrot but I know I can be anything I want to be.
twitch chat
Classic
Hi Kripp, this is OJ, your long lost brother
twitchquotes:
ʜɪ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ, ᴛʜɪs ɪs ᴏᴊ, ʏᴏᴜʀ ʟᴏɴɢ ʟᴏsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴛʜᴇʀ. ɪ ғᴏᴜɴᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴠɪᴀ ᴘᴏʀɴʜᴜʙ ᴀɴᴅ ɪ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ᴛᴏ ɢᴇᴛ ɪɴ ᴄᴏɴᴛᴀᴄᴛ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀɢᴀɪɴ ᴀɴᴅ ɢɪᴠᴇ ᴘᴀᴘᴘᴀʀɪᴀɴ ᴀ ʜᴜɢ. ᴘʟᴇᴀsᴇ ʟᴇᴛs ʙᴏɴᴅ ᴀɴᴅ ᴡᴀᴛᴄʜ ᴘᴏʀɴ ᴛᴏɢᴇᴛʜᴇʀ ᴀᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴘᴏʀɴʜᴜʙs, ɪ ʜᴇᴀʀᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴇʀᴇ sᴛᴀʀʀɪɴɢ ᴏɴᴇ... ᴘʟᴇᴀsᴇ ʀᴇᴘʟʏ ᴀsᴀᴘ ᴏᴄᴛᴀᴠɪᴀɴ, ʏᴏᴜʀ ʟᴏᴠɪɴɢ ʙʀᴏᴛʜᴇʀ - ᴏᴊ.
twitch chat
Kripp
Ben Shapiro ordering pizza
Hello, is this Pizza Hut?
Excellent. My name is Ben Shapiro. Conservative thought leader. Prominent white YouTuber. The Muggsy Bogues of the intellectual dark Web. And—look, it’s just a fact—I would like to order some pizza pie. If you are triggered by that request, I do not care. I truly do not.
Now let’s discuss conditions. First, thank you for agreeing to debate me. Typically, in fora such as this, I am met with ad-hominem mudslinging, anything from “You racist creep” or “Is that your real voice?” to raucous schoolyard laughter and threats of the dreaded “toilet swirly.” However, your willingness to engage with me over the phone on the subject of pizza shows an intellectual fortitude and openness to dangerous ideas which reflects highly on your character. Huzzah, good sir. Huzzah.
Second, any pizza I order will be male. None of this “Our pizza identifies as trans-fluid-pan-poly”—no. Pizza is a boy. With a penis. It’s that simple. It’s been true for all of human history, from Plato to Socrates to Mr. Mistoffelees, and any attempt to rewrite the pillars of Western thought will be met with a hearty “Fuh!” by yours truly. And, trust me, that is not a fate you wish to meet.
Now. With regard to my topping preference. I have eaten from your pizzeria in times past, and it must be said: your pepperoni is embarrassingly spicy. Frankly, it boggles the mind. I mean, what kind of drugs are you inhaling over there? Pot?! One bite of that stuff and I had to take a shower. So tread lightly when it comes to spice, my good man. You do not want to see me at my most epic. Like the great white hero of Zack Snyder’s classic film “300,” I will kick you.
Onions, peppers—no, thank you. If I wanted veggies, I’d go to a salad bar. I’m not some sort of vegan, Cory Booker weirdo. And your efforts to Michelle Obama-ize the great American pizza pie are, frankly, hilarious. Though not as funny as the impressively named P’Zone—when I finally figured out that genuinely creative pun, I laughed until I cried and peed. A true Spartan admits defeat, and I must admit that, in this instance, your Hut humor slayed me, Dennis Miller style.
And, with that, you have earned my order. Congratulations. Ahem. Without further ado, I would like your smallest child pizza, no sauce, extra cheese. Hello? Aha. A hang-up. Another triggered lib, bested by logic. Damn it. I’m fucking starving.
Ben Shapiro
Response to Sadge brother letter
twitchquotes:
📜 ✍ ️ 
𝓑𝓻𝓸𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓻 𝓘 𝓻𝓮𝓬𝓮𝓲𝓿𝓮𝓭 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓶𝓮𝓼𝓼𝓪𝓰𝓮 𝔀𝓮𝓵𝓵. 𝓘𝓽 𝓮𝔁𝓬𝓲𝓽𝓮𝓼 𝓶𝓮 𝓽𝓸 𝓲𝓷𝓯𝓸𝓻𝓶 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓪𝓫𝓸𝓾𝓽 𝓪 𝓬𝓸𝓬𝓴 𝓻𝓮𝓼𝓮𝓻𝓿𝓮, 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓽 𝓷𝓸𝓽, 𝓬𝓸𝓬𝓴 𝔀𝓲𝓵𝓵 𝓫𝓮 𝓼𝓮𝓷𝓽 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝔀𝓪𝔂 𝓼𝓸𝓸𝓷.
𝓑𝓻𝓸𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓻 𝓘 𝓻𝓮𝓬𝓮𝓲𝓿𝓮𝓭 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓶𝓮𝓼𝓼𝓪𝓰𝓮 𝔀𝓮𝓵𝓵. 𝓘𝓽 𝓮𝔁𝓬𝓲𝓽𝓮𝓼 𝓶𝓮 𝓽𝓸 𝓲𝓷𝓯𝓸𝓻𝓶 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓪𝓫𝓸𝓾𝓽 𝓪 𝓬𝓸𝓬𝓴 𝓻𝓮𝓼𝓮𝓻𝓿𝓮, 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓽 𝓷𝓸𝓽, 𝓬𝓸𝓬𝓴 𝔀𝓲𝓵𝓵 𝓫𝓮 𝓼𝓮𝓷𝓽 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝔀𝓪𝔂 𝓼𝓸𝓸𝓷.
twitch chat
Forsen